


Journeyed far 'neath moon and star

by TonalModulator



Series: Azura's Reluctant Pawn [4]
Category: Elder Scrolls, Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind, Elder Scrolls Online
Genre: AU where Seht actually interacts with Varuni finally, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, ESO: Morrowind chapter, Multi, major character death is just the vestige and failed incarnates, sex-as-friends for the sake of puns, takes place in ESO but is light on quests
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2020-12-09 00:11:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 25
Words: 48,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20985593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TonalModulator/pseuds/TonalModulator
Summary: The Nerevarine is sent back in time at Azura's behest to deal with some threats in the second era.





	1. The Stranger's Fate

**Author's Note:**

> This started as a headcanon-turned-canon that Ildari could go back in time and actually talk to Sotha Sil while he's still alive, and then it blew up. So now it's going to be a bunch of her reactions to ESO events, plus just generally living in the second era for a while.
> 
> I have a bunch of chapters written or partially-written, but they're not all in order, so sometimes I might post like three at a time when I finish the one that's blocking the others.
> 
> There's occasionally going to be dialogue taken from the game, either directly or slightly modified.

Ildari floated around her laboratory in Tel Uvirith, working intently on her latest magical research. It was the second year of the fourth era, and she had largely retired from adventuring, having turned her focus to her duties as Archmagister. Vehk had come to live at the tower, as there was plenty of room, and ze needed somewhere to stay after "disappearing" from hir city and Morrowind in general. Now ze spent much of hir time hovering and making the occasional comment about Iya's work. She always pretended to be annoyed, but in truth, she liked the company.

Arguing voices floated up to them, causing Iya and Vehk to exchange curious looks. They followed the voices in search of their source.

"Yes, I'm sure the Archmagister is very busy, but I assure you, this is worth her time," came the familiar voice of Divayth Fyr. It seemed he was arguing with one of her guards, who had made the mistake of trying to stop him from disturbing her. "Oh, don't bother trying to threaten me; I'm only entertaining you out of respect for Ildari."

"Let him in," she ordered, and the guard seemed happy to obey.

Divayth rolled his eyes at the guard and ascended the tower. "Sorry to barge in on you like this, but it's important and time-sensitive."

"What's going on?"

"Believe it or not, Azura sent me a vision about you a long, long time ago. I'm supposed to send you back in time to the middle of the second era. Apparently the Prince isn't done with you."

Iya raised an eyebrow in a request for more information.

"I believe she primarily wants you to prevent a major threat to Vvardenfell, though she is gracious enough to allow you some time to get accustomed to the new setting. I'm sure you'll want to see Sil; I'll be there to greet you when you arrive, and I'll help you get to the Clockwork City."

That was an exciting prospect, she had to admit.

"I'm sure you'll have plenty of other adventuring to do as well. I think I remember Molag Bal causing some trouble around that time. And once you've helped out on Vvardenfell, Sil and I will need your assistance back in the Clockwork City. Do you have your ring?"

Ildari nodded and held up her hand with Moon-and-Star on it.

"Good. Bring it with you; some people will need some proof of your identity, myself included. But, obviously, use it sparingly. Don't mention your status to Ayem or Vehk, or any false incarnates. Sil will already be expecting you, as he predicted the events surrounding the Tribunal's decline and his death long in advance. Now, any questions? Though I should emphasize that this is time-sensitive, in multiple senses."

"So, you knew me all along?" Ildari asked.

"Yes."

"You knew I was the Nerevarine even before I came to you with corprus?"

"I did."

Ildari paused. "I'm sorry. That must have been difficult for you, knowing that Seht—"

"Yes, yes. Enough of that." He waved his hands dismissively and then scratched the back of his head in discomfort. "Any non-personal questions?"

Iya smiled apologetically. "Right. Anything I need to know about the time-travel process?"

"Ah. Yes. First, this will be the first successful instance of time travel by mortals, so consider that an honor. Second, it should be extremely disorienting. I've made a potion that should counteract some of that, but it has its own side effects as well."

"Such as?"

"Nausea, headache, bad taste, the usual alchemy stuff. It's strong, but it'll be short-lived. And trust me, without it you'd be down for a week." He handed her a vial. "Now, drink up and we'll get on with it."

The effects of the potion were immediate. As soon as she drank it, she had a splitting headache, and all of her senses were dulled. She swayed and flung her arms out until Vehk offered her an arm for stability.

"_Are you sure this is going to work?_" Iya asked at a volume that was probably somewhere between a whisper and a yell, but she couldn't be sure.

Divayth laughed and began weaving the spell. "Yes, I'm very sure, because I remember the results." He released the spell. "Off you go now, and may Azura guide you!"


	2. To the hearth there comes a stranger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari arrives in the second era and goes to the Clockwork City.

Divayth stood impatiently in the Tribunal Temple in Mournhold, ignoring the glares from passing Ordinators. He was prepared to tell them that he was waiting to meet his new retainer if they asked, but none did. That was for the best; he preferred to limit his interactions with Ordinators to none whenever possible. It was inconvenient that this place was such a strong beacon in magicka-space, when it was also a hub for Temple zealots who certainly did not approve of its use as such.

Just on time, a young mer practically fell out of a rift a few meters away and struggled to get up, clutching her head. Divayth hurried over to her while trying to maintain an air of nonchalance.

"Nasty portal trip, eh? Well, you look to be in one piece, anyway. Up you go." He leaned down and offered a hand to help her up. When she took it, he passed her a charm and whispered, "This will keep you undetected until we can get outside."

Once she was on her feet, he returned to a normal volume and his usual arrogant demeanor that he knew the Ordinators would ignore. "Come along, now. We're already behind schedule."

He led the mer to the nearest door and cast a cloaking spell as soon as they crossed the threshold.

"There we are. Now nosy passersby won't be able to hear or see us. You're Ildari, I presume?"

Ildari nodded at her friend who was just meeting her for the first time in this life. Her headache was already receding, as future-Divayth had promised, and so she managed a smile as well.

Divayth nodded back, looking more focused on his task than on pleasantries. "I'll ask for proof in a moment, but first I need to set up some protections."

He held out his hand for a Psijic handshake. Ildari touched his palm with a small burst of magicka so that he could identify her magicka signature when weaving his spell. Divayth did the same in return, and then began the spellweaving.

"As I'm sure you're aware, the Tribunal are attuned to their people's thoughts about them—prayers, sort of, but broadly defined so that they don't miss anything important. So, while I can't imagine you're the pious type, you still run the risk of having your stray thoughts or memories picked up. Obviously, that would be catastrophic, and so I'm blocking off your connections to Ayem and Vehk. Sil already knows about you, so you don't need to worry about accidentally revealing yourself to him. Plus, it can be nice to have a direct link to at least one living god." He took a few more seconds to finish the spell, and then continued, "Now, may I see that ring of yours? Don't worry, I won't try it on."

She handed him the ring Moon-and-Star, and he examined it on the projected plane. It was indeed authentically Dwemeri in make and Daedric in enchantment. He handed it back to her with a satisfied nod.

"Between that and your signature—and the visions from Azura, I suppose—I hereby stand convinced."

Iya tilted her head. "You can recognize me from my signature?"

"Oh, yes. Yours is an interesting one. You've got all these different facets, all unique, but all with the same underlying pattern. Each one was likely defined in a different life. The primary facet, I suspect, comes from you in this life, and the second strongest one, which seems to be driving the pattern for all the others, is distinctly Nerevar." He smiled. "On that note, it's good to see you."

"You too, Divayth. Though it's only been moments from my perspective."

"Since you've got some time before whatever impending doom Azura wants you to face, I assume you'd like to see Sil?"

"Very much."

"Good, he's very excited to see you," Divayth said with a warm chuckle. "I assume the effects of the travel have worn off enough that you can walk steadily?"

Iya took a few steps and nodded. "Seems that way."

"Good. We'll go through Bamz-Amschend. This way."

He removed the cloaking spell, and they descended the steps away from the temple and continued down toward the bottom of a waterfall.

"Have you been to the Clockwork City before?" Divayth asked as they walked. He noticed Ildari's hesitant expression and caught himself. "Other than that one time, I mean."

"Just that one time," she said.

He nodded quietly. "Sorry. I can't imagine that's a happy memory. But anyway, you're in for a treat, then. It's an absolute marvel. Sil's always pushing the limits; I swear I find something new to be amazed by every time I'm there."

"Other than Sil himself?"

"Some new innovation or something," he said, waving his hands in mock protest. "Maybe also his smile, if I can coax one out of him. Or his laugh, if I'm especially lucky."

He stopped and laughed, shaking his head, and then continued walking. "Look at me. I forgot what your ring does to people."

"Surely a big strong wizard can resist such a minor enchantment," Ildari teased. "That was all you."

"Oh, Neht. What are we going to do with you this time?" he said with an amused smile behind a sigh. Then he looked more serious and asked, "Sorry, is Neht still okay? Or do you prefer Iya? Or no initials at all?"

"Iya's better," she admitted. "Or Ildari. Whichever."

He nodded. "Got it, Iya."

They reached the bottom of the waterfall and headed into a hidden cavern and the ruin of the ancient Dwemer city of Bamz-Amschend. They traversed the ruin without incident and came to a platform where a number of humanoid fabricants were working. Ildari noted with interest that they looked distinctly non-Dwemeri.

"Sil's factotums," Divayth explained. "You'll see plenty more in the City."

To their left was a second platform up a small staircase. A group of factotums stood by the top of the steps, apparently guarding the place. Ildari looked at Divayth to get a sense of whether she should be preparing for a fight, but he seemed unconcerned. As they drew close to the steps, the factotums parted and knelt to allow them to pass.

Divayth giggled. "I love that little touch."

Beyond the guards was a smaller raised platform with a strange dome-like clockwork device.

"After you," Divayth said. "Just touch it. It'll take you to the Clockwork City."

Iya hesitantly reached out a hand, and as soon as she touched it she was sent warping through space. When the sensation ended, she was in what looked like a city of rock and brass.

"Welcome to the Brass Fortress," Divayth said. "Sil should be in the Clockwork Basilica, the city hall. Follow me."

They walked through the city and up a couple of steep ramps until they came to an impressive building that Iya assumed was the Basilica. An Imperial woman in what looked like the armor of Seht's order stood blocking the door with her arms folded. Her eyes were fixed on Divayth, and she did not look happy to see him. Divayth's exasperated sigh led Ildari to believe that the feeling was mutual.

"Fyr," the woman said. "As if your presence wasn't bad enough, now you're bringing outsiders into the Clockwork City?"

"At Sil's discretion, obviously," Divayth replied dismissively.

"You'll forgive me if I don't take your word for it." She turned her eyes to Ildari. "You. I'm Luciana Pullo, Proctor of the Clockwork Apostles. And you are?"

"My name is Ildari," she said, trying to sound confident under the proctor's cutting gaze.

"Why have you come to the Clockwork City, Ildari?"

She realized suddenly that she wasn't prepared for that question. "I'm here because...Sotha Sil...is an old friend of mine. I wanted to see him. And his legendary city."

That was clearly not an acceptable answer, judging from Luciana's eyebrows. But before she could respond, the door behind her opened.

"Ildari," came the calm voice of Sotha Sil.

He was much taller than he had been as a mortal, which was saying something, as he was already towering as a mortal. Ildari assumed that it was his chosen alternative to levitating like his comrades, while still requiring people to look up to him. His skin was gray, having accepted the Dunmer appearance. And best of all, he was _alive_. Ildari broke into a wide smile.

"Thank you for your diligence, Proctor Luciana. Ildari has my leave to be in the City." He turned to the other two. "Please, come with me."

Luciana eyed them once more before stepping aside to allow them to enter the Clockwork Basilica.

Seht led them to his quarters at the top of the Basilica. He did not speak during the walk, but it was not an awkward silence. Rather, it was a silence that carried the understanding that he would speak when it was time to do so, and not before.

Once they were in his chambers and safely out of the public view, Seht turned to face Ildari. His red eyes glowed with warmth, and his lips curved into a smile detectable only to the experienced observer. "Welcome, my friend."

Iya didn't respond with words. Instead, she leapt up at him for a hug, which he returned with equal intensity, and even a chuckle.

"It is so good to see you," he said.

"You too, Seht," she whispered, her face pressed against his chest.

He set her down, and she stepped back and just looked at him for several moments. She could hardly believe she was seeing him again, after so many years of thinking that she'd missed her chance to meet the "SI" of ALMSIVI. She held tight to this new concept and tried to get her mind to overwrite that horrible image of his dangling corpse with this new image of a vibrant, _living_ mer.

Divayth broke the silence. "I'm off, then. I'm sure you two have plenty of catching up to do. I'll be around." He levitated to Sil's height and kissed him. "Have fun, and don't forget your barrier spells!" He booped Sil on the nose before returning to the ground.

Sil blushed slightly, but he and Ildari both thanked Divayth for his help as he took his leave.

They tacitly decided to talk about logistics before the more personal topics. They sat down on a brass sofa, and Seht pulled up a projection of the city and gave her a visual tour, explaining the different regions of the Radius as well as the purposes of the various buildings in the Brass Fortress. He explained more about the Clockwork Apostles and their officers. None of them knew Ildari's true identity, and it would stay that way in the short term. But he also predicted that there may turn out to be an overall benefit for some to learn about her background—Proctor Luciana, in particular.

When Iya expressed interest in staying in the Clockwork City at least some of the time, Seht told her about the citizenship process and said he would sponsor her personally. He also assured her that there would be quarters and a lab set up for her within a day.

There was a lull in the conversation, during which Seht was the one staring at Iya and processing the fact that he was with his old friend again.

Finally, he asked softly, "How have you been, my friend?"

Iya raised her eyebrows slightly. "You mean...for the past 3,500 years or so?"

Seht laughed. "I suppose that is a complicated question. Hmm. A more direct question is, how much resentment do you harbor? Let me be clear that any amount would be justified."

"Resentment toward you guys? Honestly, I'm mostly over it. Mostly. I was upset for a while, sure, especially at Azura's prompting. But truthfully, if I had known back then how little Azura truly cares for her servants, and if I had seen the world you would create, I would not have asked you to make that oath."

Seht nodded contemplatively. "Thank you, Ildari. That is good to hear."

"Now, that's not to say I think everything you guys have done is totally okay. I would have appreciated dying less frequently, for one."

"Perfectly reasonable."

"But I know the whole struggle was largely constructed by Azura in the first place. Any resentment I feel is outweighed by being happy to see you again." She was quiet for a moment. "I wish I could see Ayem too."

"If your adventuring takes you to mainland Morrowind, you likely will."

"Maybe, but not as myself. I wish I could actually talk to her again, before she gets...like she was at the end." Iya shifted uncomfortably. "I never really had the chance. I don't know if she ever even recognized me, beyond just my role as Nerevarine. I _tried_ to talk to her. At the end. I tried so hard..." Her voice broke, and she took a ragged breath. Seht offered her a hand, which she squeezed tightly. She wiped her eyes with her free hand and whispered, "Sorry."

"Take your time," Seht said softly, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles.

She took a couple breaths. "Just so you know, when Ayem sent me to 'confront' you, I had no plans of killing you. She said I'd probably have to, but I thought there was absolutely no chance you'd be beyond reason."

"I know."

"I guess that's not worth much, since she'd already killed you, but there it is."

"It is worth a great deal. I'm sorry you have to bear this burden." He looked at her hand and touched one of the rings on her finger. "Speaking of unfortunate burdens, is this Barilzar's ring?"

"Oh, yeah. Shit. I didn't even think about that. Do you want it?"

He hesitated, but shook his head. "Keep it. But _don't_ lose it, and don't show Barilzar, should you encounter him."

Ildari nodded solemnly. Then, hoping to lighten things a bit, she said, "So, Divayth seems to have made some assumptions."

Seht laughed uncomfortably. "Yes, I was hoping he wouldn't be quite so forward about it, but then, I should not have expected any different."

She shrugged. "It's nice to have his opinion out in the open. I definitely wouldn't want to cross any boundaries that might have shifted over time or changed with the circumstances."

"If anything, I think you would be the one setting boundaries, as you are the one with reason to want to keep your distance. Or, for all I know, you may be in a monogamous relationship in your time. How we interact is up to you."

Iya thought about it for a moment. Then she scooted over so that she was next to Seht, picked up his arm and wrapped it around her, and leaned against him.

Seht chuckled warmly. "I admit that is an answer I had hoped for. And, you are welcome to stay here tonight while your own quarters are being prepared."

"Thanks," she said with a smile. Then she tilted her head with slightly amused curiosity. "Do gods sleep? Other than the weird pseudo-sleep that Vehk described, I mean."

"We can," he said. "But I could easily go without it, if you would prefer to sleep alone."

"No, I think I'd like the company."

He smiled. "Then you shall have it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I've always sort of imagined the First Council et al. as a blob of super close friends whose relationships can be either romantic or not, or ambiguous, but definitely with friend-intimacy.


	3. Eats their sin, and is reborn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari confronts Seht about one of the incarnates who was killed at the Tribunal's hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one might be kind of rough, because the incarnate who gets killed is a kid, so heads up there (though it's also thoroughly regarded as a Very Bad Thing). You can safely skip this chapter if you want.

Keeping memories of eighteen lives in one mortal mind is a strange task. In theory, Ildari had access to all of them, at least as much as would be expected if she were living each life alone. But this was not to say that she was constantly remembering each life all at once; that would be highly impractical. In reality, she had plenty of memories in storage that she had never directly accessed in this lifetime, not because they were hidden, but because they simply had never had cause to be accessed. Even now, several years after she had regained the memories of her past lives, she would occasionally come across some stimulus—a certain smell, a certain emotion, even another memory—that would bring up a scene she hadn't thought of in lifetimes. Usually, they were fairly inconsequential, but once in a while, they brought a great deal of suppressed baggage with them.

Ildari sat in the Archivox, reading a book she had pulled off a spool at random. Fittingly, it was a volume of _The Truth in Sequence_, Seht's liturgy that hadn't been available to her in third era Morrowind. This one recounted the story of the destruction of Mournhold by Mehrunes Dagon, and how Ayem and Seht had (non-permanently) destroyed the Prince right back. The old city had been just about leveled in the attack, and a new city was built on the ruins. She ran the math and determined that the Mournhold of the present was a little less than half as old as the Mournhold of her home time.

It had changed a great deal over the centuries, which was a blessing, really, because it would have been hard for her to stomach the city that she was familiar with. Even the temple building was different, currently having a space for each Tribune, a relic of a time all Three regularly spent time in the capital among their people.

An image flashed across her mind briefly—an old memory. Very old, it seemed, as it took a great deal of focus to hold onto it and probe it for context. As it started to clear up, she recalled the Tribunal Temple in Old Mournhold. At that time, it had one central hall where the Tribunal would hold audience together, as one unit. The hall was huge, and the Tribunes very tall...then it occurred to her that she was a child in the memory. When had she visited the Tribunal personally, especially as a child? Surely, that was the sort of memory that would be stronger, as memories of significant events were often recalled and reinforced throughout the lifetime. That is, unless that incarnate never had the chance to reinforce the memory...

That did it. The rest of the memory clicked into focus, along with the overwhelming feeling of dread that accompanied the event, and Ildari was nearly sick when she relived the spear piercing her heart.

Without thinking, she rose and left the Archivox for the Basilica. She was shaking and could hardly see straight, but she brought out her Nerevar aspect and strode with the confidence of the Captain into the Sotha Locutorium, where she was fortunate enough to find Sotha Sil. He was talking to Proctor Luciana, but she did not wait for a gap in the conversation.

"Serjo Sotha," she said in her Nerevar voice, though she had just enough presence of mind to speak modern Dunmeris. "I would have a word with you in private."

Seht stopped talking mid-sentence and blinked. The last person who had addressed him like that was, well, Nerevar. It was strange to hear such a familiar voice from so long ago, especially coming from a mer in her thirties. It was stranger still that despite the change in roles over the centuries, with Ildari no longer being his Hortator, he knew with absolute certainty that he was in trouble.

Proctor Luciana, on the other hand, saw only a brazen and insubordinate citizen who used her supposed "old friendship" with Sotha Sil as an excuse to circumvent the rules and disrupt the order of the City.

"Excuse me?" Luciana addressed Ildari, stepping between her and Sotha Sil. "I don't know who you think you are, but I shouldn't have to tell you that you have no right to come stomping up and start making demands of Lord Seht."

Despite Iya's clear agitation, Seht let the proctor speak. Ildari needed to know that if she was to safely stay in the Clockwork City, she would have to be more careful, and he suspected that hearing it from someone other than himself would help to reinforce that point. But her agitation was clearly worsening under Luciana's chastisement, and so he did not delay further.

"Thank you, Proctor Luciana. We will talk more later. Ildari?" He noted Luciana's incredulous stare but did not respond, instead gesturing for Iya to follow him into the adjacent Sotha Sacristy.

"Shit, I'm sorry, Seht," Ildari muttered as soon as the door closed behind them. She paced the floor while Seht calmly took a seat.

He nodded simply. "What is on your mind, Iya?"

"Oh, that's right: I'm not sorry. I'm angry." She covered her eyes with her hands and shook her head as she spoke, still pacing. "Angry and disgusted and..._horrified!_" She stopped pacing and turned to face Seht, holding her hands out expectantly. "I mean, what the fuck, Seht?"

"You will have to be more specific."

Iya let out a sharp breath that doubled as a laugh and sat down across from Seht. She rested her head in her hands while she reconstructed the memory and put her thoughts in order, and then looked up to speak. "A memory came back to me. Do you remember a failed incarnate named Aldadim-Ouabihn?"

A wave of recognition crossed Seht's face, followed by guilt, both hidden well. "I do."

* * *

He was the second incarnate, not counting Nerevar himself. The first had taken decades and several visions from Azura to even consider the possibility that he might be an incarnate, and had ultimately been brushed off by his Tribe. He died peacefully in his sleep a week later. In order to avoid wasting another half-century or more in uncertainty, the Prince decided to take a more active role in the next incarnate's journey.

The wise woman of the Urshilaku Tribe received a vision. Azura told her to wake up and go outside, for Nerevar Reborn awaited her. She obeyed, and sure enough, she opened the door to her yurt just as dawn was breaking and found an infant waiting on the mat. His t'lonya was embroidered with a moon and star, and stitched to it was a ring bearing the same design.

Unable to find his parents—or whether he had parents at all—she adopted the baby and named him Aldadim-Ouabihn, "prophesied reincarnation." Following the wise woman's example, the Tribe welcomed him and celebrated him as the incarnate. She continued to receive regular visions from Azura with guidance for raising the incarnate. As soon as he was old enough to understand, Aldadim began receiving visions as well, telling him of his destiny: how he would unite the Dunmer, cast down the false gods, and fulfill the promises of the hero Nerevar.

Missionaries from the fledgling Tribunal Temple visited the camp one day in an attempt to wrangle in the stragglers to the Dunmer's new faith. Their proselytizing was rejected and they were sent on their way, but not before they had spoken to a charming young boy of barely ten years old, wearing a curious ring and calling himself the prophesied reincarnation. They skipped the rest of their tour and headed straight back to Mournhold, and soon after, a pair of Ordinators arrived at the camp to arrest Aldadim-Ouabihn. There was some resistance, but ultimately the Urshilaku knew that resorting to violence now would lead to an all-out war. They would not survive a war against the Houses and any Ashlanders who may have joined them, and so they gave the boy over and prayed to Azura for his safety.

The Prince of Dawn and Dusk knew a lost cause when she saw one, and their prayers went unanswered.

The trip back to Mournhold was mostly quiet. Aldadim peppered the silence with the occasional string of questions, but the Ordinators kept their responses short, though their reticence was more from discomfort than impatience.

"Why do I have to wear these shackles?"

"Because you're under arrest."

"What does that mean?"

"It means we're holding you according to the law, and you have to come with us and not go where you want."

"Where are we going?"

"Mournhold, on the mainland."

"Why are we going there?"

"Because you have to go before the Tribunal and account for your crimes."

"What crimes?"

"Blasphemy. Conspiracy. I'm sure they'll give you the list."

"What will they do with me?"

His conversation partner took a moment to respond. "I don't know," he said quietly. Then he caught himself. "They will do what they know to be just. It is not for us to decide or question. Pray that they have mercy."

Aldadim was quiet for a while. He wondered how being the incarnate could be blasphemy if he was being guided by Azura herself.

The trek continued for several days, and he frequently found himself looking at the Ordinators' helmets. Although he couldn't remember his past lives, he had seen Nerevar enough in his visions to recognize him.

"Why do you wear helmets that look like Nerevar if you hate him?"

The Ordinator laughed uncomfortably. "We don't hate Nerevar. In fact, he's a saint according to the Temple, and his image is sacred to our order."

"But I thought I'm under arrest because I'm Nerevar Reborn."

"You're under arrest because you're _not_ the Nerevarine, because there's no such thing as the Nerevarine. You're lying to turn people away from ALMSIVI and keep the Dunmer divided."

Aldadim bristled at the accusation. "I'm not lying! I'm supposed to _unite_ the Dunmer, not divide us. I'm supposed to prove that the Tribunal are false gods who break promises. Azura said so."

The other Ordinator, who had been quiet for most of the trip so far, spoke up now. "Yeah? Well, I don't see any Daedra around, do you? You're at the Tribunal's mercy now. As far as you're concerned, they're the only gods that matter. Maybe if you learn that, and learn it well, they'll deal kindly with you."

By now, they were nearing the end of the journey. They had crossed the Sea of Ghosts that morning and would reach Mournhold in a matter of hours. One more question burned at the boy's mind. When the meaner Ordinator stepped away to relieve himself, he tapped the nicer Ordinator—or at least, the more talkative one—on the shoulder.

"Is Azura mad at me?"

The Ordinator glanced around and then leaned down to the boy's level, afraid of being overheard by his partner. "Why would you think she's mad at you?"

Aldadim bit his lip and blinked back tears. "Because she stopped talking to me as soon as you made me under arrest. I keep praying and praying and she's always answered me before but now she doesn't. I think it's because I failed her. I know I did something wrong, but I don't know what. But I must have, because I was supposed to be her champion but now she hates me and the Tribunal are going to kill me."

"You don't know that," the Ordinator said softly. He rested a hand on the boy's shoulder. "Maybe you should think about turning to the Tribunal. They'll be more inclined to show you mercy if you've accepted them as our gods. Maybe that's why your Prince isn't talking to you. Maybe she's quiet because she wants you to live."

When they arrived in Mournhold, the two Ordinators walked Aldadim-Ouabihn into the Tribunal Temple, into the central audience chamber, and up to the dais, where the Blessed ALMSIVI waited to pass judgment on the ten-year-old heretic. The hall was huge, and the three young gods towered over the mortals.

"_Why_ is he in chains?" Almalexia demanded. She dropped to her feet and hurried down the steps from the dais to meet the child.

"Clear the hall," Sotha Sil commanded, and all but the four of them made their exits.

Almalexia knelt before the child, and the shackles fell away at her touch. He looked at his freed wrists, and then at Almalexia. He wondered if that meant he wasn't under arrest anymore, but he was afraid to ask. Instead, he just smiled hesitantly. Almalexia placed a hand on his face and regarded him with a sad smile for several seconds, and then stood up and returned to the dais, tears already prickling at her eyes.

She began the ceremonial proclamations when she had retaken her spot on the dais. "Aldadim-Ouabihn, you stand before the Blessed ALMSIVI, divine Tribunal of Morrowind, to be judged by the Triune wisdom of Mercy, Mastery, and Mystery for your crimes."

Sensing that her voice would break if she continued, Sotha Sil picked up from there. "Our sacred justice proclaims that you are heretic and a false incarnate, an insult to the Tribunal Temple and a threat to the Dunmer people. Such offense shall not be tolerated. We determine that you are irredeemable and order your death."

Almalexia squeezed Vivec's hand when Sotha Sil finished talking. Vivec assumed that was an affirmative signal and squeezed back, but looked at her face for additional confirmation. The tears in her eyes were all the confirmation ze needed, and they turned out to be contagious. Ze blinked to clear up hir vision, and then looked to Sotha Sil, who had also caught the wet-eye contagion. He responded to hir look with a solemn nod. Vivec lowered to hir feet and moved slowly down the steps, stopping in front of the boy.

Ze looked down at the child before hir. "Nerevar?" ze asked quietly.

The incarnate nodded.

Ze closed hir eyes for a moment, letting the tears stream freely down hir cheeks. _Three usurper gods crying as we prepare to kill our dear friend and arch-enemy, who happens to be a ten-year-old boy. What a strange world we have created._ Then ze opened hir eyes and drew the spear that was slung on hir back.

"I hope you will forgive us someday, my friend."

* * *

Ildari unconsciously grasped at her heart as she recalled her execution. "I was _ten years old_," she said in a whisper. "What threat could a ten-year-old possibly pose?"

"Do you want an answer?" Seht asked calmly.

"No. Not now. Maybe later." She sighed and drummed her fingers against the table, thinking as she spoke. "I've long accepted that you'd have done things that would look...questionable from the outside. That's just part of ruling, and I imagine it's even more the case when you're reigning as gods for thousands of years. I've largely refrained from judging you as rulers, lest I need to judge the one who trained you." She glanced at Seht with a weak smile at the end, though she held it only long enough to make her point.

Her friend sat so calmly across from her with that even gaze masking endless calculations, hardly different from the one he wore when he ordered Alda's execution. She was normally inclined to believe the claims that he loved his people; it certainly seemed true back in the days of the First Council. But things like this made her wonder how much of it was just detached calculations, always in service of some imagined future people, never the actual, living people.

"But there's a line, Seht, where unfortunate necessity becomes outright cruelty, and that was crossing it. You rejected the Daedra for being cruel and arbitrary—no argument there—but I thought you ascended to give the people a better option. How can you claim that when you murder ten-year-olds in the name of the law? Or am I to understand that arbitrariness was the key failing of the Daedra, and that cruelty is acceptable as long as it happens in accordance with order?"

Some emotion flashed across Seht's face, but he quickly regained his composure. Was it guilt, or defensiveness? Anger, even? Iya had already decided it was his turn to speak, but she gave him a few seconds before she probed.

"So, yes, tell me, Seht: How could you _possibly_ justify killing a ten-year-old?" She tapped the table on "possibly" and her ring clanged against the brass, supplementing the emphasis that her voice had already given it.

With his even voice, as if he was either unaware or hyper-aware of the weight of the situation at hand, he began to explain. "It was not a simple decision. We gave it a great deal of discussion. Ayem initially wanted to spare him—spare you, rather—and raise you in the Temple, but we determined that that would make you too great of a risk."

"I was ten years old."

"Ten-year-olds grow up."

"When they're given the opportunity," she mumbled.

Seht sighed almost imperceptibly, but continued. "If you were being directly influenced by Azura, then having you so close and teaching you the workings of the still-developing Temple would likely have proven to be our undoing."

"Azura ditched me the second I was arrested. Not that any of you bothered to ask before you stabbed me."

"There was no point in asking. Even if she had given up on you as the Nerevarine in that life, she may well have re-established contact if you became a viable asset again. Try to imagine it from your perspective as our mentor, as we were still adapting to being on our own without your mentorship to look to." He ignored Ildari's raised eyebrow. "The fact is that we were three people tasked with rebuilding both the government and the religion. We still thought the Dwemer might return at any moment. The people were still reeling from losing you the first time and being cursed by Azura in the aftermath, and we had a great deal of damage control to play on both those fronts. We had _just_ given the newly-named Dunmer an alternative to Daedra worship, we were still solidifying Temple canon—even Vehk was not quite thirty Lessons in—and we were still struggling to be seen as legitimate across Morrowind. We could not allow even the slightest leniency, especially in the face of a Daedric threat, no matter how young."

"You know, I complain often about my treatment by Azura as nothing but a tool. It even helps me understand your broken oath, because it is true that the Daedra care little for mortals, and the people should be better served by gods who know what it's like to be a mortal, to struggle like a mortal and love like a mortal. And yet here you are, calling me a risk, an asset, a threat. A _thing._ In my time, you specifically are known for your love of the people. Was that pure propaganda? Are you too far dissociated from your people to see us as people? Have you been a god so long that you've forgotten what it is to be mortal, or have you been like this from the moment you got your hands on the Tools?"

Seht was quiet for a long time, processing the hefty accusations, and then let in a soft smile and reached for her hand, which she hesitantly allowed. "Iya, Iya, my dear friend. I would say you know me too well, but in truth I think you know me precisely the right amount. You are right, of course. I spend so much time in the Cogitum, shaping the future, seeing every person as a cog in a grand machine, that it seems I needed a reminder."

"And as for Alda?"

His smile faded. "Aldadim's execution—murder, I won't sugarcoat it—was a tragic and, yes, cruel necessity." He lowered his voice. "When I studied the Tools, I was able to foresee a world where the people would be free from Daedra worship. There would be no more need to live in constant fear of the wrath of chaotic ancestor spirits. We could instead offer the people gods who would love them, who would walk among them and understand them. When I presented my findings to Ayem and Vehk, they agreed that it was not simply an option, but our obligation to the people to bring about that future. We knew there would be costs—your trust chief among them, and that will always haunt us. We knew Azura in particular would retaliate, and that we would be faced with inconceivable challenges. And we decided together that they would be our obstacles to face, for the sake of the future we imagined for our people."

"It's easy enough to call it 'your' obstacle when you're not the child on the sharp end of Muatra."

"Azura did not place you before us as a child. She set you up as her tool—you know this. She was shaping you to be the harbinger of our destruction. She placed you before us as an ultimatum: either kill an innocent child, or cast off our people's hope and return to the old ways. It was a horrible decision, make no mistake, but it was one made long before Aldadim was born."

Ildari did not like being reminded how little control she had over her fate, but she couldn't pretend it wasn't true. She knew she should be taking this up with Azura at least as much as she was with Seht, but, naturally, she found it less terrifying to argue with a Tribune than with a chaotic ancestor spirit.

"Couldn't you have at least waited? Given me another decade or so?" she asked.

"Perhaps we could have. We may have acted too soon. I grant that."

She paused and spent a moment in thought, and then shrugged. "Azura probably would have just offed me around then anyway."

Seht tilted his head, eyeing Iya with questioning concern.

Iya's gaze was distant as she ran through her past lives. "Yeah...Memories of dying tend to be the fuzziest, I guess, especially when it's unceremonious. But there were a bunch of times when I think I just sort of died, of nothing in particular. Usually right after it became clear that I wasn't going to succeed as the Nerevarine." She pulled her gaze back to the present and to Seht. "Huh. I never put that together before."

Seht was now regarding her with a deep frown. "For all I try to regard death as an inevitability, I must admit that I find that appalling. The absolute disregard she shows for you when she begins _and_ ends your life at her whim...I am sorry, Ildari. I know Azura is ultimately the one doing this to you, but of course I share the blame. If I had known—"

Iya interrupted him with a wry smile. "Be honest, Seht. You'd have done exactly the same thing, but you would have been extra sad about it."

His expression softened, and soon became a laugh. "You know me well, Iya."

Iya stood up, walked around the table, and climbed into Seht's lap, where his arms waited to receive her. "Just so we're clear, I'm not okay," she said as she rested her head on his chest.

"No one could expect you to be."

"I'm still mad at you guys, even if it's Azura who should be taking most of the blame."

"That is what we're here for."

She sat up slightly. "No, not as gods, though. I'm mad at you guys, my friends, personally, for killing me when I was a defenseless child."

"I understand. You should be."

She nodded and leaned back into his chest. "I'm going to punch Vehk the second I get back to my time."

Seht chuckled. "That seems entirely appropriate."


	4. The Motions of the Wheel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iya and Seht engage in the motion of The Sublime Piston.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I basically wrote this chapter entirely because I wanted to make a "Divine Metronome" pun. It kind of blew up. Deldrise Morvayn gives us a lot to work with.

Ildari sat at the table of her quarters with a room-temperature bowl of nutriment paste. She had a volume of _The Truth in Sequence_ out in front of her in an attempt to give herself something more interesting to focus on. A knock on her door pulled her attention away from both.

"Iya," Seht said with a warm half-bow when she opened the door. "I was hoping to check in with you, to see how you are adjusting. May I come in?"

"Of course." She stepped away from the door to allow Seht inside. "I was just having, uh, dinner."

She sat back down at the table in front of the bowl. Seht gave her a look of mild amusement as he joined her.

"You sound very enthusiastic."

"I'm as enthusiastic as the paste is interesting," she said, picking up another spoonful.

"Is it truly so bad?"

"No. It's...inoffensive?" she offered. "That's about all I can say. I get that you need to control everyone's nutrition and everything, but couldn't you mix it up a little? Split it into sweet and savory portions? Have it come in hot or cold, crackers and dips, bars for the busy Apostle, something?"

The faint amusement stayed on his face, but he replied, "This is one reason I value having people here who do not see me as a god. Everyone else complains about it among themselves, but when I ask for input, suddenly everyone is eager to extol the virtues of flavorless paste. Thank you. I will look into variations."

While Iya continued to work on her paste, Seht's eyes landed on the book in front of them.

"Ah, you're reading _The Truth in Sequence_. Satisfactory, I hope?"

Iya nodded thoughtfully. "It takes some processing, but I think it's helping me get a better sense of the place, actually."

"Good. How is your laboratory?"

"Great! It seems like there's a tool for everything, as long as I can figure out what they do."

He smiled. "I am glad to hear it. I realize I have not said this explicitly, but do be careful not to research anything that relies on knowledge not yet available in this time period, lest you break the dragon and advance science by hundreds of years."

She nodded. "I will be careful."

"Thank you." He looked around the room. It already had the first signs of being lived in, which was good. "Is your living space comfortable?"

"Comfortable..." she repeated. "I have to say, Seht, given what passes for a bed around here, I've started to wonder if you've ever had sex in your life."

Seht's lips curved into an amused smile. "I would have thought you knew the answer to that."

"I thought I did, but then I got here and I figured I must have fabricated the memories. Do you really expect people to _sleep_ on a tiny sheet of metal, let alone fuck on it? Or is this just one way of encouraging your Apostles to be creative?"

Seht raised an eyebrow and rose from the table. He approached the bed and, keeping his eyes on Ildari, reached underneath and flipped a switch. The frame shifted and the bed expanded to twice its original width.

"That's a start..." Iya begrudgingly admitted.

His gaze still unmoving, he flipped a second switch, and a set of bedding rolled itself out onto the metallic bed. Iya huffed in mock annoyance as Seht silently closed the gap between them. He leaned in close enough for Iya to study the design of his brass arms, if she weren't too busy thinking of ways to get that smirk off his lips, and pressed their foreheads together.

"See what you could have if you would simply read the documentation instead of mocking me?" he asked quietly.

"Better sex?"

When his smirk deepened in place of a reply, she nudged him with a quick kiss. He responded with another quick kiss and then lightly bit her lip before straightening up and returning to his seat. He watched out of the corner of his eye to judge whether she would respond like Nerevar. The tightening of her jaw and fists served as confirmation.

"You're not very subtle, you know," Iya said, noticing his satisfied expression. In some sort of retaliation, she stretched up and kissed his neck, just below the corner of his jaw. Her lips lingered for a moment, letting herself savor the feeling of his sharp, if quiet, inhale. She pulled back in time to watch his eyes flutter open again.

"Finish your dinner, Ildari," he said.

Iya laughed. "Mm, I can think of no better aphrodisiac than flavorless gray mush." She made a show of taking another spoonful with gusto.

"I only wish to make sure you have sufficient energy."

"Mhm." She rolled her eyes. "So tell me about your work while I eat."

"My work?"

"Yeah, tell me about the cool stuff that you've been dying to talk about but can't tell your Apostles about."

"Hmm...Well, there are the Nine Analyses of the Exalted Enigmas. The Apostles know some of the details, but as it is a study of the Tribunal's divinity, certain key details must be left out."

He explained the studies while Iya worked on her paste. Even now, as an accomplished mage of future-magic, she found it difficult to follow some of Seht's ideas. What she could understand, however, was fascinating, especially given that her understanding of Heart of Lorkhan and Kagrenac's Tools was largely pragmatic. She was proud of herself for being able to ask a few questions, and Seht seemed delighted to answer.

She set her bowl aside when she had finished her nutriment paste and said, "You know, I almost wish I'd grown up in Morrowind, or at least with some exposure to the Tribunal's teachings. I think your approach to magic would have helped me in my studies."

"Where did you grow up?"

"In the Imperial City."

"Ah. I imagine it is nicer then than it is now?"

"What's it like now?"

"Absolutely crawling with Daedra, with the Dragonfires unlit."

She tried to mask her brief hesitation. Technically, it was true that the Dragonfires were lit the whole time she was there growing up. "Then yes, for the most part."

Luckily, he did not ask what it was like the rest of the time. "Did you grow up with the Eight, then?"

It took her a moment to realize that he was talking about what she knew as the Nine, a few centuries before Tiber Septim's ascension.

"Not really," she said. "At least, not worshipping them. Maybe that's why the Empire wasn't too big on my family."

"Hmm." They were facing each other now. Seht's hand floated to Iya's and ran along her fingers. "Perhaps it is for the best that you did not grow up worshipping the Tribunal, either. That may have made things complicated."

"Yeah?" Iya tilted her head playfully. "What sorts of things?"

Seht chuckled but took the cue, and leaned in and kissed her. This time they let it last, without the teasing and tension from their earlier kisses. But soon they were anxious to move forward and re-familiarize themselves with old territory in one-and-a-half new bodies.

"You're too tall," Iya complained. "I can't do anything smoothly."

Seht rose from his seat at the table and took Iya's hand as he walked over to her bed.

"I would hate for all of the work I did to fix the bed to go to waste, anyway," he said, voice dripping with irony.

"Shut up," she laughed.

He sat down and guided her onto his lap. "Better?"

She kissed him once, and then sat back with an exaggerated contemplative expression. "Hmm...a little."

He lay back, bringing her with him. "And now?"

Her lips met his again and then traveled along his jaw and down to his neck, causing him to tense and grip at her shirt. "Much better," she whispered.

She lingered there, teasing with gentle breath and more kisses until Seht's hands found their way under her shirt, lifting the hem to allow cool metal fingers to make contact with skin. She returned to his lips and encouraged him by adding her tongue to the mix while he explored. After a moment, she sat back up and pulled her shirt the rest of the way off. Seht's eyes traveled her front, defining a path that his hands followed: her hips, her stomach, her waist, her lower chest. He sat up to kiss her as his hands traveled farther upward.

"May I?"

Iya nodded, and Seht unlaced her bra and set it aside. Then he turned his full attention to her breasts, running his hands over them, covering them with kisses, sucking gently on her nipples and then everywhere else. Deciding it was his turn to be topless, Iya tugged at the sash on his robes. The sash came loose and her hands moved inside the robe, pushing the fabric aside to reveal more of his chest. She pushed the robe off his shoulders as far as she could, tracing her fingers over the lines where metal met skin. Seht did the rest of the work, releasing her so that he could slide his arms out of the sleeves and let the robe fall off. They lowered back down onto the bed and let their chests press together as firmly as their lips, maximizing their contact as much as possible.

Seht broke away to speak and rolled Iya to the side so that they were facing each other. Before he said anything, he took a moment to run his fingers through Iya's hair, along her cheek, down her neck, across her shoulder, down her arm. He studied the shape of her new body and the expressions on her new face as she closed her eyes and smiled at the gentle touch.

"I should say upfront that I am happy to take this as far as you would like, but I hope you will not push yourself beyond where you feel comfortable. I know this is nothing new for us, exactly, but it has been thousands of years, and for you, several lives. I imagine it must be at least a little difficult balancing the Ildari you are now with the Nerevar you were when we last knew each other. Not to mention, you are in an entirely new body with new sensation. If it is strange for me, it must be especially strange for you." With a small smirk, he added, "Even if I can still bite your lip to turn you on."

Iya nodded sagely. "It's the boobs, isn't it?" she asked. "Throwing you off? They are stunning, I know."

Seht laughed. "They are, but I'm serious." He hesitated. "I don't mean to pry, but have you had much...experience in this life?"

"Just Vehk, really, and even then our relationship has never been heavily focused on sex. I wasn't exactly popular in Cyrodiil, so nothing to report there."

"Would you like to move more slowly?" he asked, voice gentle but serious. "We could stop here, or focus on learning _all_ about your new body and new preferences until you feel comfortable moving forward."

"Hmm...On the one hand"—Iya picked up his hand that was tracing her side and kissed each of his knuckles—"that does sound tempting. _Very_ tempting. But on the other hand..." She pushed him by the shoulder onto his back and climbed on top of him, sitting back on his legs. Her fingers teased his lower abdomen before sliding under the waistband of his leggings and grabbing hold. She bit her lip to keep herself from laughing before she could deliver the line she'd had in mind since she read the first volume of _The Truth in Sequence_, while she waited for his attention to come back to what she was saying. When his eyes found her face again, she continued. "I've been hearing so much about this Divine Metronome, and now I'm dying to see it."

Seht looked confused for a moment, and then burst out laughing when it clicked. "Iya, you can't just _say_ things like that!"

Ignoring him, she leaned down, ghosting her lips over his ear, and whispered, "Is your Mainspring Ever-Wound?"

He rolled them to the side and buried his face in Iya's chest, his shoulders shaking. When he lifted his head to breathe, he asked, "Is this all you've gotten from those books?"

"It's not _all_ I've gotten, but I'm hardly going to discuss theories of Tamriel Final—Anuvanna'si—while we're half-naked. Well, maybe later. But for now, come, Lord of Curiosity." She guided his hand down into her underwear. "Are you not Curious?"

His laughter quickly subsided and was replaced with careful focus. He propped himself up and let his fingers answer in the clear affirmative, circling a few times and then sliding inside, the motion of the smooth clockwork digits rhythmic and precise. Iya removed the rest of her clothes when it became clear that it wasn't on Seht's to-do list. Not that she was complaining; she was enjoying his current focus quite a bit.

It did seem, however, that he had forgotten her original request and was due for a reminder. She slid a hand under his waistband again, staying outside his underwear as a precautionary measure. "So, the Divine Metronome?" she probed. "May I sit on your Throne Aligned?"

"_Gods_, Iya."

"Which gods?" she laughed.

He pulled his hand away without ceremony—which she admitted she deserved—and placed a finger to her lips. She tried to suck on it before he pulled it away to remove his leggings and underwear. Trying to play along, he searched for another term from _The Truth in Sequence_. "Behold, the Nameless Will."

"'Nameless?' Seht, that's a penis."

He flopped to his back. "I give up!" Iya was now giggling uncontrollably. She repositioned herself on top of him and started trying very hard to kiss him while he held her off. "No, no! I said I give up," he said with mock seriousness.

She finally relented and sat back with a pout.

"Oh, _fine._" Seht released her and pulled her down for a kiss, which turned into several more kisses. "Are you done teasing me, then?"

"Done? Oh, no." His faint sigh was masked by a heavier one as she carefully lowered herself onto his Nameless Will. She traced her lips along his neck, barely lifting her mouth away to speak. "Join me in the reciprocating motion. The Sublime Piston. The lover's embrace."

"I can't believe you're not only quoting Deldrise's lectures in bed," Seht groaned as he cast a barrier, "but you've actually managed to make it hot."

* * *

When the motion of The Sublime Piston had run its course, they lay wrapped up in each other's embrace. Iya rested her head in the curve of Seht's neck while his arms held her to his chest and his fingers drew invisible designs on her back.

"Did you still want to discuss Tamriel Final while we're more than half naked?" Seht asked softly.

Iya chuckled, breathing out against his neck. "No. I just want to be with you."

The reply held more truth than she was willing to admit. As flippant as she was acting, this moment of intimacy with her dear friend meant a great deal to her. Not the sex, specifically, so much as the opportunity to be close again after thousands of years, and after thinking she'd never even see him again. She wanted nothing more than to hold tight to this moment out of fear that she might lose him again somehow.

Seht kissed the top of her head, sensing the true depth of the reply. "That can be arranged."


	5. Righteous curse her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They have to explain what's going on to Luciana and Varuni.

As Ildari made her way to her laboratory to begin her research for the day, she found two Clockwork Apostles standing by the door. She recognized one as Proctor Luciana, the stern Imperial woman who had given her and Divayth trouble when she arrived. The other was a kinder-looking Dunmer woman. Ildari nodded politely in greeting as she approached.

"Good morning, Ildari," the Dunmer Apostle greeted her. "I don't believe we've been formally introduced. I'm Provost Varuni Arvel."

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Provost," Ildari said with a bow.

"Would you mind coming with us?" Proctor Luciana asked. Noticing the concerned look on Ildari's face, she added, "We just want to have a chat."

If anything, that explanation made Ildari more wary. "Am I under arrest?"

"No. Should you be?" Luciana asked.

Ildari forced a polite smile. "Of course not. Lead on."

"Don't worry," Varuni said as they began walking. "You're not in trouble. We just want to learn more about you."

Ildari smiled nervously and nodded. She could tell that the Provost's intentions were sincere, at least. The rest of the walk continued in an awkward silence until they reached Proctor Luciana's office.

"Have a seat." Luciana indicated for Ildari to sit across from herself and Varuni.

The awkward silence resumed while Luciana sorted through the papers at her desk. Ildari wondered whether the Proctor was consciously trying to make her nervous.

"So, Ildari, there are some gaps in our records that I'd like to rectify. Plus, you seem very important to Lord Seht, so we want to get to know you better too." Luciana paused to scan Ildari's face for any information it might reveal. "You've said you're old friends, right?"

"That's right."

"How old?"

"How old am I?" Ildari asked.

"Is that a difficult question?"

Ildari hesitated. She couldn't say she was 35, because then it would be impossible to be "old friends" with the likes of Sotha Sil. But on the other hand, she couldn't give her age relative to Nerevar's birth, because she didn't exactly look like she was well over 3,000 years old.

"It's not so much difficult as...complicated," she replied.

"I'm not asking for anything complicated. Just your age."

Ildari continued to hesitate, realizing that her knee-jerk response on arriving in the City had ruined her chances of having a plausible backstory.

"Okay, let's move on," Luciana said with an audible sigh. "The reason I ask is because I can't seem to find anything about you prior to your arrival. Granted, your case is special in that your citizenship was sponsored by Sotha Sil himself. But even in those rare cases, Lord Seht keeps meticulous records on every citizen, including their history. So as far as the City is concerned, you have no history. No history and no age."

Provost Varuni spoke up with the next question. "While Sotha Sil sponsored your citizenship, he did not directly invite you to the Clockwork City. How did you get here?"

"Divayth Fyr brought me here through Bamz-Amschend," Ildari said.

Varuni seemed surprised and looked at Luciana. "Bamz-Amschend is accessible?"

"Fyr probably broke in," Luciana said with clear exhaustion at the mere thought. She pulled out a notebook and made a quick note before looking back at Ildari. "Why did you decide to come here?"

Realizing that she might as well lean into the "old friend" explanation now, as it was at least close to the truth, she said, "I hadn't seen Sotha Sil in a while, and I wanted to catch up and see his legendary city."

"Why now?"

"I was between jobs," she said, trying to sound casual.

"Oh, what do you do?" Varuni asked.

Ildari shifted uncomfortably. In her own time, she knew she could give the what-I-do-is-my-own-affair line, and everyone would know not to press the question. Unfortunately, she suspected that would have the opposite effect in this situation. "I'm...an adventurer, I suppose."

Luciana was growing more and more suspicious, and even Varuni was starting to let her comforting demeanor slip in place of some concern.

Before they could ask more questions, the door opened. Luciana glanced up and laughed in defeat. "I don't know why I ever expect to get anything past you."

Ildari risked a glance behind her and saw Sotha Sil entering the office.

"Lord Seht!" Varuni leapt up from her seat and bowed deeply. "It is an honor, truly. How can we help—We were just interviewing—" She stopped and sat back down when Luciana put a hand on her arm to calm her.

Seht did not respond, instead heading directly for the factotum in the corner of the office.

"By the word of Seht, you are bound."

The factotum projected an interaction panel. "Authentication needed."

Seht placed his hand in the panel, turning projected images of gears in some pre-established pattern. The projection remained when he was finished turning the gears, as though it needed continuous contact in order to maintain authentication. Seht accordingly kept his hand in place, while he otherwise assumed a semi-casual stance.

"By the word of Seht, I am bound," replied the factotum.

"Restrict permissions on recording: control to Sotha Sil exclusively."

"Permissions restricted. Access to recording available exclusively to Sotha Sil."

"Suspend all recording in this room and adjacent zones, pending explicit command to resume."

"Recording suspended indefinitely in current room and adjacent zones."

"Modify unit's shutdown parameters: Disable wake-phrase. Restrict re-activation type to manual, exclusively. Restrict re-activation permissions to Sotha Sil, exclusively."

"Wake-phrase disabled. Re-activation type restricted. Re-activation permissions restricted. Unit will awake only to manual re-activation by Sotha Sil."

"Deactivate unit."

"Deactivating." The factotum powered down, and its projected panel disappeared.

They watched in silence as Sotha Sil crossed the room and sat down next to Ildari. While Ildari was curious about the whole display, Luciana looked surprised, and Varuni looked absolutely stunned.

"Luciana, please deactivate your recording systems."

"Oh, of course." Luciana had nearly forgotten that her own systems were off the network. She flipped down a panel on her collar and interacted with a small device, and then closed the panel and nodded at Sotha Sil.

"In case it needs to be said, this conversation must stay entirely confidential," Sotha Sil said. "There shall be no records kept, and you shall destroy any that you have taken so far immediately upon the conclusion of this meeting. Do you understand?"

Both Apostles nodded solemnly, recognizing that this was not a time for commentary.

"Good." His serious expression faded into a smile. "Your commitment to thorough record-keeping is exemplary, and your attention to detail is remarkable. In truth, I considered constructing a background for Ildari, but I knew it would be time wasted, as the two of you would find the holes sooner or later. I have also calculated that it would be safest for everyone if you knew the truth, rather than some constructed story."

Luciana relaxed somewhat with the compliment. Varuni, in contrast, had never so much as spoken directly to Sotha Sil, and looked appropriately like she had just been personally recognized by her god for her performance.

Seht continued, "First, let us establish why Ildari has no recorded history. Ildari, in what year were you born? The simple answer, please, if it can be called that."

"Year 400 of the third era," Ildari said.

Luciana raised her eyebrows. "Of the...?"

"_Third_ era, yes," Seht said. "Several centuries in the future, though I will not be more specific than that."

"Time travel?" Varuni asked.

"Indeed. Ildari has no history in this time period because her history exists largely in the future."

"Largely?" Luciana repeated. "When did you arrive in this time?"

"About two weeks ago," Ildari said.

Luciana looked to Seht with a confused expression.

"Perceptive," he said. "How could she have _any_ history before the third era? And further, as you are no doubt still wondering, how could we be old friends if Ildari has not even been born?"

The Apostles nodded expectantly.

"Luciana, do you remember the conversation we had shortly after your arrival, about the events surrounding the Tribunal's ascension? You asked about Nerevar."

Luciana nodded.

"Varuni, what do you know of Nerevar?"

"St. Nerevar the Captain was the protégé of Lord Vivec, husband of Lady Almalexia, and Hortator at the time of the Tribunal's ascension. He died at the Battle of Red Mountain—or shortly thereafter?—after giving the Tribunal his blessing. He's now the patron saint of warriors and of House Redoran."

Seht half-laughed, but looked impressed. "It seems Temple education is going smoothly. Do you know of any of the more fringe claims about Nerevar?"

"There are scattered...blasphemous rumors," Varuni said nervously. "Nothing that a loyal servant of the Tribunal would pay attention to, of course."

"Of course. Do you know of the Nerevarine prophecies?"

"The Ashlander legend? I've heard of it..."

"While it is primarily held by the Ashlanders, there is more to it, though it is known to few. As high-ranking Clockwork Apostles, you have a right to access apographa—knowledge not permitted to laypeople. When we ascended and the Daedric Prince Azura changed the Chimer into the Dunmer, she also promised that her champion, Indoril Nerevar, would return and avenge her. According to her prophecy, the incarnate of Nerevar, known as the Nerevarine, would cast down the Tribunal and reinstate traditional ancestor worship with the Good Daedra at the center. Naturally, we suppressed this prophecy, as we were trying to free our people from Daedra worship. As a result, it was largely forgotten, with the exception of some more religious Ashlander sects. However, in several centuries, when the Temple's power to protect the people wanes in the face of a great evil that blights the land, the prophecies will resurface, and Morrowind look to the Hortator and Nerevarine for protection." He turned to Ildari. "Do you have your ring?"

Ildari held out her hand where she wore Moon-and-Star.

Varuni gasped. "Is that...That can't be..."

"One-Clan-Under-Moon-And-Star," Seht confirmed. "Forged by the Dwemer, blessed by Azura, said to instantly kill anyone but Nerevar who tries to wear it. Not something I've experimented with, myself."

"So...you...are the Nerevarine?" Varuni asked.

Ildari nodded.

"You are St. Nerevar, really?"

She nodded again, though being called a saint always felt strange.

"And you remember your life as Nerevar?"

"And every life in-between," Ildari said.

"Shouldn't you be mortal enemies, then?" Luciana asked.

"If Azura had her way, absolutely," Iya said. "But she doesn't seem to understand that it's very hard to hold a grudge for thousand of years, especially against your best friends for actions that are arguably justifiable."

Varuni looked confused. "Arguably?"

Luciana jumped in before that thought could get developed further. "So by some accounts you're, what, three, four thousand years old? I can see why that would be complicated."

"If the Nerevarine prophecies are only relevant in the future, why are you here now?" Varuni asked.

"Apparently Azura wasn't done with me. More existential threats to the world, the usual. I hear Molag Bal's up to something. I'm also going to have to stop some threat to Vvardenfell, again. Or, for the first time?" She shrugged. "That's all the detail I've gotten."

Seht turned to Varuni, who was clearly deep in thought. "Varuni, you have questions."

She waved her hand nervously. "Oh, no, nothing of consequence."

Seht shook his head calmly. "On the contrary, it is of great importance."

Varuni nodded slowly, her face focused. "This is just...difficult to process. Not the time travel; I can accept that well enough. I just didn't know the Tribunal _could_ decline, or be cast down at the will of a Daedra. And the notion of apographa...it shouldn't surprise me, of course. I know that secrets are your domain alone, and there is plenty that is not for mortals to know. But I suppose I never considered the possibility that some things I understood as fundamental truths might actually be, well, fabricated. Maybe it's irrational, but I can't help but wonder how much of what I know is actually true."

"Hmm." Sotha Sil remained still for several moments with his fingers steepled in front of his face and an expression of deep concentration. Ildari looked at him expectantly, and then at the Apostles. Neither seemed particularly fazed, and so she figured it must be a common occurrence. When Luciana caught her gaze, she mimed a writing motion and mouthed, "He's calculating."

"You raise a valid point, Varuni," he said after a long time. "I will provide both of you with information that I calculate will help you reach a better understanding of fundamental truths: information about the nature of the Tribunal's divinity. It goes against the hierographa, and so I reiterate that it must be kept absolutely confidential. I am sharing it with you because I trust that it will strengthen your understanding and your loyalty to the Tribunal. Shall I begin?"

Varuni looked absolutely terrified, but she and Luciana both agreed.

"At the Battle of Red Mountain, when the Tonal Architect Kagrenac attempted to power the Brass Tower, he did so by taking power from the Heart of Lorkhan—that is, Lorkhan's literal heart—which lies at the center of Red Mountain. When the Dwemer disappeared, they left behind the tools that Kagrenac used to tap the Heart, and we were left with a dilemma: should we destroy the tools, or keep them safe? Almalexia, Vivec, and I, who were at the time advisors to Nerevar, believed that we should keep them and study them, in case the Dwemer should return. Nerevar agreed on the condition that we swear an oath before Azura that we would not use the tools on the Heart in order to attain divinity for ourselves."

He paused and looked at Ildari with well-hidden regret on his face.

"When we studied the tools, we saw the world we could create for the Chimer if we replaced the chaotic and cruel Daedra as gods. It was then that we realized that as much as we were honor-bound to keep our oath to Nerevar, we were also duty-bound to break it for the benefit of our people. Thus, we used Kagrenac's tools to absorb divinity from the Heart of Lorkhan."

Varuni nodded as Seht spoke, keeping a thoughtful expression on her face. When he was done, she looked at Ildari and said, "So, that's what you meant by 'arguably justifiable.'"

Seht studied her closely. "How are you taking this, Varuni?"

"It...fundamentally shakes my perceptions of reality, but what good is a reality that can't get fundamentally shaken on occasion, hm?" she replied with a weak laugh. "Truly, I thank you for your trust in me, Lord Seht. I promise it is not misplaced. It just may take some time for me to process this."

He nodded with a gentle smile. "Take your time." Then he turned his gaze to Luciana. "You look almost comically unperturbed."

Luciana shrugged. "I've always figured the whole 'achieved divinity through superior discipline' explanation was just one of those stories meant to patch the gaps that mortals aren't supposed to understand. Honestly, I thought that much was common knowledge. I never really put much thought into where your divinity _did_ come from, but now I know."

Seht smiled. "I love the diversity of approaches among my Apostles. I hope you will continue to find support in each other as needed. You may, of course, also call on me if you need help processing the things you have learned today. I have trusted you with a great deal of potentially burdensome information, but you are never alone in this."

He looked between his two Apostles for a moment before moving on. "I trust that there will be no further issues regarding Ildari's history?"

Luciana waved a hand. "I'll forge some records."

He chuckled. "Your confidence worries me, but does not surprise me." Looking at each of the three before him, he continued. "I thank you all for your patience, cooperation, and trust in this. Now, if there is nothing further to discuss, I will re-activate the systems and take my leave."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is definitely going to change parts of the actual CWC questline, but hey, it's already an AU.


	6. Prophets speak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari gets killed, but then gets partly better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops I accidentally turned game mechanics into magicka lore.

After spending a few weeks in the Clockwork City and getting used to the time period, Ildari decided it was time to go exploring the world on the surface. She looked over a map with Seht, trying to decide on the best place to start her adventures. Of course, she was very familiar with the Morrowind region, but the details had a tendency to change over the centuries, and so it was nice to have some guidance. They both agreed that it was too soon to encounter Ayem or Vehk, which ruled out Vvardenfell and Mournhold, even most of the Deshaan region. They decided on the town of Davon's Watch. It was part of Indoril's holdings, but busy enough that she wouldn't stand out too much and catch the Temple's attention.

Then there was the matter of teleportation magic.

"Have you noticed that the magicka matrix is structured differently now compared to how it is in your time?" Seht asked.

"Not in quite those terms," Iya admitted with a faintly reproachful smirk. Even in this life, with her substantial magical education, she found it hard to keep up with the things Seht took as fundamental. It was an endearing, if at times frustrating, quality. "I noticed that magic feels different, if that's what you're asking."

Seht smiled with gentle amusement and nodded. "It is. The way that magicka flows throughout Mundus—throughout the Aurbis, even, for the most part—changes over time. To the average observer, the change is slow enough to go mostly unnoticed, or at least be adapted to quickly. Comparing two states several centuries apart, however, one can find noteworthy changes."

Iya leaned back in her chair as she tried to picture the system that Seht was describing. It was not how she was used to hearing it talked about. Even the courses she had taken in magical theory were more focused on detecting and molding magicka—interaction at a local level. They never discussed global-scale properties of the "magicka matrix," much less its dynamics. She was intrigued by this new perspective.

"Go on," she said.

To make the visualization easier, he popped a magical pen out of his hand and began drawing evenly-spaced dots in the air, with a cartoonish person among them. "If my projection is reliable, then you come from a time when the flow of magicka is relatively evenly distributed. Levitation, for example, is likely fairly common, even over extended distances," he said. He waved the pen around, and the cartoon figure followed his motions, with the matrix adapting to accommodate before returning to its original structure. "Likewise, recall spells can be used virtually anywhere, as long as you have explicitly set a matching mark." The figure teleported across the field, floated to a new position, and teleported to the same spot again, over and over while Seht spoke. "Am I correct?"

Ildari nodded.

With a wave of his hand, the diagram vanished, and Seht began drawing a new one. This time, instead of being evenly spaced, the magicka dots were concentrated in some areas and thinner in others. "At the present time, the matrix is settled into a state with scattered attractors, or wells. As teleportation magic relies on the structure of the matrix, the wells act as hubs in a teleportation network, commonly known as wayshrines." With another wave, the dots became small dashes, each one oriented toward the center of the nearest well. He drew lines between the wells to illustrate how it could be seen as a network. "In a sense, the wells are passive marks. Simply by visiting them, you will be able to recall to that location from then on. You will also find that recalling from one well to another is much easier than recalling when you are not in a well. The latter is still possible, but can be taxing. Is that all clear?"

"It's very interesting, actually."

"I agree. It is robust enough that its state at theoretically any time can be predicted with relative accuracy, and yet it is dynamic enough to create and dissipate attractors over time. Not to mention the flexibility on the local level...but I digress." He popped the pen back into his hand and waved the diagram away. "Davon's Watch has a well, as most major settlements do. I can attune you to it. I will also attune you to the wells here in the Clockwork City. I keep them protected, but you have my leave to come and go as you please." He moved his hands in a deliberate pattern before her. "There. Can you detect the marks?"

Iya reached for her marks for the first time since she arrived. "I can. Interesting," she said. She found a few new marks throughout the city, including in places she'd never been, and another in eastern mainland Morrowind. She drew her attention back to her surroundings and said, "Thanks, Seht."

"Good luck on the start of your second era adventures, my friend," Seht said with a smile. With a bit of irony, he added, "May Azura watch over you."

She rolled her eyes with a laugh. "Yeah, well, feel free to keep an eye on me, too, since I still have no idea what Azura has planned for me."

* * *

A woman in red and black hooded robes approached Ildari almost immediately after she arrived in Davon's Watch. "Greetings. My benefactor wishes to speak to you about a matter that could affect the fate of our world."

_Finally, some instructions._ It seemed a bit low-profile for Azura, but then, this was Indoril territory. She assumed that possessing someone and lifting them up in a pool of light was frowned upon around here. The Prince was probably just being careful.

"What does your benefactor want?" Iya asked.

"If my benefactor wished to discuss details in the open, why send a messenger?" the woman asked. "The matter is for your ears only."

"Understood," Iya said. "Where can I find this benefactor?"

The woman marked a nearby house on her map. "Do not tarry."

Iya nodded politely, and the hooded figure took her leave. Though the woman had not mentioned it, Ildari knew Azura well enough to know it was most respectful to wait until dawn or dusk. A look to the sky told her that there were just a couple hours until dusk. She spent the time acquainting herself with the town. She refreshed her gear and picked up some glow dust at the alchemist, just in case. Then, when the sun was low and the town was cast in a fading orange glow, she headed in the direction of the house where the "benefactor" awaited her.

When she arrived, she was surprised to encounter not a booming voice and golden light, but a terrified man at a table, bound and gagged.

_Is this the work of the Temple?_ she wondered as she approached the man. But it didn't seem right. If they wanted to arrest him for being a Daedra worshipper, why did they leave him there? Where were they now? Just as she cast a detection spell, three people uncloaked behind her. She was vaguely aware of a blow to the head as she swayed and blacked out.

When she woke up, she was being dragged up to an altar in chains. She wanted to struggle, but they had her under some sort of command spell, and she was in no state to fight it. She could only watch helplessly as she was lifted and laid out on the altar. As the dagger was raised, she wondered bitterly if this was Azura's intention all along. Why send her back in time to kill her? To torment Seht by waving his old friend in front of him and then ripping her away? To torment her friends back in her own time when they couldn't bring her back?

There wasn't much time to contemplate Azura's reasoning before the dagger slammed into her heart.

* * *

The Prisoner woke up. That alone was strange. She was a veteran at dying, and never before had she had an experience in the aftermath that could be described as "waking up," especially not waking up lucid and with a sense of self.

She opened her eyes—so she still had sense organs—and stood up—limbs, too. Apparently, she was in a body. Her own most recent body, even, as her movements felt natural and familiar, her skin was still gray, and the hair that she brushed out of her eyes was still bright red.

She looked around at all the piles of bones and decided quickly that this place was definitely not Moonshadow, nor was it the Spiral Skein or Snake Mount. So...had she not actually died? She felt her chest where the dagger had struck. It wasn't bleeding, and it didn't hurt, exactly. It didn't feel like much of anything. Nothing really felt like anything, except for a strange ache that was everywhere and nowhere in particular. She was still aware of her senses, but she also felt detached from them, as though there was some missing link that prevented her from fully experiencing what she felt. She slowly walked around the room—actually, it seemed more like a huge cell—as she got used to the unsettling state.

"Whoa, there! Are you all right?" came a voice from behind the cell door. The speaker was an extremely tall Nord woman who looked distinctly not dead. "The name's Lyris."

"Uh," the Prisoner fumbled to respond with her own name. She had had so many names, and none of them seemed to come to her readily. Nerevar? No, that was an old one. Her brain supplied a few more before landing on the right one. "Ildari."

Lyris advised her to stand back as she smashed the lock and let her out of the cell. Ildari wanted to ask what was going on, but they were off fighting Dremora before she had the chance. It was only after a projection of an old man called "The Prophet" appeared and made things even more confusing that she was able to stop and ask her questions. She started by asking where they were.

"You're obviously not in Tamriel anymore," Lyris said. "Think of the most miserable, depressing place you've ever been in your life. That's paradise compared to Coldharbour."

"We're in _fucking Coldharbour_?" Ildari asked, surprising herself more than Lyris, from what she could tell.

"So you've heard of it," Lyris said with a faintly amused smile, tempered by the setting.

Of course she had heard of it. The Four Corners of the House of Troubles had been part of Chimeri-Dunmeri society since the Velothi Exodus. "So...am I dead, then?"

Lyris nodded grimly.

"Then why am I in my body? How are we talking?"

"I don't know. Once we rescue the Prophet, he can tell you about the Gods and the ways of Oblivion. I don't understand any of it, myself."

Ildari sighed. It was just like Azura to keep her alive even when she was dead. Putting her in Coldharbour seemed a little excessive, but she got the sense that she wasn't really in the place to be questioning the Prince of Dawn and Dusk, especially when there was someone who apparently needed their help.

"Okay. Lead on."

* * *

Once the Prophet had been freed—at her new friend's expense, to her great reluctance—the old man was willing to entertain some of Ildari's questions.

"You are but a trace of your former self. A soulless one. An empty vessel that longs to be filled," he explained. The revelation hit her like a punch in the stomach, but not quite as hard as it might have if she had her soul.

He continued, "It is as the Scrolls foretold, but not exactly as I imagined."

"Scrolls?" Ildari's brow furrowed with curiosity. "You mean..."

"The Elder Scrolls, yes. Familiar? I am not surprised. The Scrolls speak of you in several places, Vestige. Or, perhaps I should call you Nerevarine."

"Ah," Ildari said weakly. If this mysterious man knew about her role in the future, things might get more complicated than she had anticipated. "'Vestige' is fine."

Sensing her worry, the Prophet said, "Your secret is safe with me, Vestige. I would not disrupt events foretold by the Scrolls."

After they fought their way to the gate, the Prophet called down something that he called a skyshard, which would somehow allow her to regain her physical form. She wanted to ask more questions, but more than that, she wanted to be away from Coldharbour. So, she absorbed the skyshard and they returned to Nirn.

* * *

Ildari woke up once more, this time in what looked like Skyrim, based on the style of the furniture. A projection of the Prophet was there to greet her, telling her that they would meet again to thwart Molag Bal's schemes. When he was gone, she knew that she had to go back to the Clockwork City before anything else. For one thing, Seht would probably want to know more about this threat from Molag Bal. She understood that he had a history of taking the Prince down a peg, and he could likely provide valuable wisdom. Plus, he was probably worried, since the Prophet seemed to think she was out for a long time.

As Ildari sought the local wayshrine, she became more aware of the ache she had felt in Coldharbour. The uncomfortable and almost painful sense of detachment seemed to grow stronger now that she was farther away from her soul, if measures of distance could even be considered meaningful. In fact, the feeling was becoming almost overwhelming. She sincerely hoped that what she was feeling was just a temporary response to having her soul ripped out, because there was no way she would be able to handle it for very long.

She found the wayshrine just outside of town and recalled to the Brass Fortress. She trudged up to the Clockwork Basilica and all the way to Sotha Sil's study, hoping he was there and not in the Cogitum Centralis. As luck would have it—or perhaps it was Seht's will—she found the study unlocked and occupied. Seht jumped at her arrival, his expression a mixture of surprise and relief.

"Ildari! I've been so worried. I lost track of you shortly after you arrived in Davon's Watch. What happened? Are you all right?"

She didn't have the energy to respond right away, and instead kept walking toward him. Seht stopped her by the shoulders and examined her with deep concern; she returned only a weak gaze.

"Iya?" he spoke gently, his voice quiet and even in an attempt to hide his fear. "Where is your soul?"

She squeezed her eyes shut for a second. She wanted to explain everything—and she would, eventually—but now that she was in the comfort of a friend's presence, she had let her guard down and inadvertently allowed the strange feelings to reach a critical point. The best she could do was whisper, "Coldharbour." Then she looked back up at him and held her arms out. "Please?"

He released her shoulders and caught her in an embrace as she flopped against him. It took a while for the tears to come, long enough to make her worry that her emotions were ripped out with her soul. But before too long she was sobbing into Seht's chest while he hesitantly rubbed her back.

"Coldharbour? What happened, Iya?" he asked again, still gently despite his growing worry.

She took a breath and squeezed her eyes shut again as she tried to organize the events into something she could explain.

"Can we sit somewhere?"

"Of course." Seht ported them to his quarters and sat down on the couch. Iya went right for his lap and wrapped her arms around him, squeezing as tight as she could. Seht squeezed back, but waited quietly for her to talk.

Iya recounted her trip while Seht listened. His grip only tightened as she spoke, almost to the point of discomfort. She looked up at him when she was done and saw that his face was set in a hard, faraway gaze. This was a Sotha Sil she knew, but one who came out rarely, only when his people had been deeply wronged. She was glad to be on the right side of it, and almost felt bad for those who weren't.

"I think it goes without saying that the hooded figure you spoke with is not an Azuran cultist. Though whether this was Azura's plan, I cannot say."

"I wouldn't put it past her," Iya mumbled.

"Nor would I," Seht said, his voice quiet but fierce. "Regardless, there will be an investigation to root out Molag Bal worshippers in Morrowind. We will _not_ abide Daedric cultists harvesting our people's souls."

He was quiet for a moment; Iya assumed he was communicating with his fellow Tribunes to set a plan in action.

"As for you, whether it was Azura's will or not, it seems you will once again be in a Prisoner role. Though I have not studied the Elder Scrolls myself, I am not surprised to hear that you are a recurring character."

Ildari sighed. "Ayem have mercy."


	7. Redeems the mad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari meets with Almalexia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is technically a quest-related chapter, but I'm mostly going to skim over the majority of the actual quest content for these types of chapters and focus on stuff like Iya's reactions or new things that branch off of the story.

Before following the orders to head to Mournhold, Ildari made a stop back in the Clockwork City. She couldn't bring herself to go to Almalexia's holy city without first checking in with Seht. The Maulborn would have to wait an extra day or so.

Iya paced back and forth in Seht's quarters. "Do you think I'll get to see her?"

"I think that is likely, considering how you have helped the region so far."

"Do you think she'll recognize me?"

"Do you want that?"

"No, that would be very bad," she said. "But also _yes_, more than anything."

Seht gave her a sympathetic look, which she tried to ignore. She thought she must look pathetic, worrying this much about an imagined interaction that, if all went according to plan, would never happen. But she desperately wished for the opportunity to talk to Ayem like she had with Seht, to dilute the horrible images burned into her mind from the last time they met.

"I'll be careful," she said as if trying to reassure herself. "What do I need to do?"

"Don't wear your ring, of course. Hide it, if you can. If she points out that she can't connect to you, you could attribute it to your current lack of soul. And know that she values her divinity greatly. As strange as it may feel, you should show her the utmost deference. Kneel when presenting yourself to her, do not question her, regard her with awe."

Iya nodded, processing the instructions. "What do I do if something goes wrong? If she does figure me out or something?"

"Call me and I will intervene."

"Call you?"

"Pray to me."

"Right." It was still hard at times to get used to her friends being gods. "But as long as I'm careful, it shouldn't come to that, right?"

He hesitated. "It is...a distinct possibility."

She stopped dead in her pacing and whirled around to face him. "'A distinct possibility?' What do you mean?"

"Ayem is sharp. There is a...nonzero chance that she will figure out who you are."

She narrowed her eyes. "What sort of nonzero chance?"

"Just be careful, and call me if you need help."

Now Iya was getting impatient. "That's not a number, Seht."

"I do not discuss the exact details of my predictions with mortals," Seht said, hiding a smile. He had almost forgotten how adamant Nerevar could be.

She laughed bitterly and resumed pacing. "I'm _literally_ from the future! But, what, since I didn't drink the Lorkhan Juice, you won't even tell me whether to expect to make pleasant conversation with one of my best friends? The one who, last time we met, snapped and killed you and tried to kill me before I killed her instead? What if she decides to kill me again? What if she decides to be sneaky about it and I don't have the chance to call you?"

"Keep your voice down," Seht warned softly. "The recommendations I have given you will maximize your chances of success, and I will be watching in case anything does go wrong."

Iya sighed deeply. Seht offered a hand and a gentle smile. She stopped pacing to take it, turning to face him. He placed his free hand on her face.

"You will be fine, Ildari."

* * *

Upon reaching Mournhold and speaking to a registrar, Ildari learned that Almalexia had summoned her personally. Her stomach leapt at the news. She knew she shouldn't be surprised, but she had somehow expected it to take at least a little while.

On her way up to the Temple, she was stopped by Naryu, a living ancestor of sorts as her predecessor in the Morag Tong, who wanted her help stopping the Maulborn. She was hoping Ildari could use her "hero" status to pull some strings. She seemed surprised, but hesitantly optimistic to learn that Ildari was on the way to "a date with the Sacred Lady." The phrasing caused Iya a twinge of pain, but she hid it and her nervousness well and agreed to keep Naryu in the loop while hiding the Tong's involvement from Almalexia.

She was surprised upon entering the Temple to find that Almalexia was waiting for her in the lobby. She was even more surprised by the Sacred Lady's appearance. Words like "stunning" and "dazzling" took on new meaning in the presence of Almalexia. True, she was radiating light. But she was also so, overwhelmingly beautiful, a beauty that was rivaled _maybe_ by their wedding day. She hadn't looked like this when they had last met, the time that Iya did not want to remember. She had been pretty then, yes—she always was, really—but this was different. She looked vibrant, glowing with energy and life.

Iya's feet carried her before the goddess where she lowered to her knees before making any direct address. After taking several seconds to gather herself, she finally spoke.

"It is truly an unfathomable honor to meet you, muthsera." She almost cringed even as she spoke. It didn't feel right. Was it too much? Too little? Both?

"Rise, my child. Welcome to Mournhold. Your name is known to the Tribunal...but, your name alone. You are a Dunmer, and yet, I do not recognize you."

She rose to her feet as ordered, but kept her eyes respectfully averted. "I was raised outside of Morrowind, muthsera, and regrettably, without Tribunal worship. I have only recently come to know your light."

"Then we welcome you, Ildari," Almalexia replied calmly. Her well-trained diplomatic voice was even harder to read now than it had been so long ago.

They discussed the Maulborn situation, and Ayem noted that she sensed Ildari hiding something. She was afraid for a moment that she had already managed to compromise her cover so soon, until Ayem referred to her "secretive allies" and Iya remembered that the Morag Tong was also involved.

Before leaving the Temple to carry out Ayem's orders to investigate the Maulborn presence, Iya stopped at the altar in Sotha Sil's cloister. She smiled when she saw the scattered tools and construct parts. She wondered if they were offerings, or if Seht was always working on something even when holding audience, or both.

She wanted to send a progress report, but wasn't quite sure how exactly to "pray" to her friend-god. Kneeling awkwardly before the altar to give it her best shot, she concentrated and spoke in her mind, _Uh...hey Seht? It's Iya. I think it went okay, but she might be a little suspicious. She said my name was known to the Tribunal, and only my name, but I don't know if that means she's mentioned me to you and Vehk, or if you guys just normally talk about yourselves in the collective. Anyway, maybe keep an eye on me? Okay, thanks. Uh...bye._

* * *

After tracking the Maulborn through the sewers and dealing with the Daedric incursion that Magistrix Vox had unleashed on the Temple, Ildari met Almalexia outside. The goddess seemed almost distracted, and her ire at Vox almost feigned.

"Come back inside the Temple with me," she requested when their official business was concluded.

Ildari almost didn't notice that none of Almalexia's Hands came with them, until they reached her cloister and she waved the doors shut, leaving the two of them alone.

"Kneel, my champion," she ordered. Her tone was still friendly, though it carried a clear signal that she would not tolerate any deviation.

Ildari knelt and instantly noticed that she was locked in place by some sort of paralysis spell. As if that weren't enough to bring back unwanted memories, Almalexia dropped to her feet and began pacing in front of her.

"Who are you, Ildari? Why are you hidden from me?"

"I am undetectable with spells that detect life, because my soul was taken from me by Molag Bal's cultists and is currently in Coldharbour. If you cannot detect me, that may be why."

Almalexia chuckled. "A clever, well-rehearsed partial truth. And unfortunate, to be sure. But no, that is not the reason, and I think you know that. You have been hidden from me, purposefully. And I would like to know why."

Ildari closed her eyes and began praying as Seht had instructed. _Seht, help, please. Seht, help. Seht, help. SEHT, HELP. SEHT, HELP._

"Not feeling forthcoming?" Almalexia stopped in front of her, leaned down and reached into Ildari's pocket, and then into the smaller pocket that was supposed to be protected against detection magic, and pulled out a ring. Holding it out precariously between her fingers, she asked, "What is this?"

Iya felt a chill wash over her as she realized that her cover was blown. She continued her prayer even more fervently, hoping Seht would arrive before Ayem killed her or extracted timeline-threatening information.

"It's pretty," Ayem said. Shifting to Chimeris, she asked, "May I try it on?"

"Ayem, no, please!" Consciously, Iya knew it was a very obvious test, but she could not stop herself from responding.

"Aha, that answers that."

_PLEASE, SEHT. PLEASE, SEHT. PLEASE, SEHT._

"But it doesn't answer my first question. Why. are. you. hidden. from. me?"

Iya realized too late that she had started whispering her prayer out loud.

"'Please, Seht?'" Almalexia repeated. "Yes, you do have the feel of the Clockwork City about you. You have been living there, yes? Curious. But do you really expect Sotha Sil to come to your aid, incarnate? No, no. He hates your beloved Azura the most out of all of us. By calling on him, you only hasten your judgment."

Sotha Sil materialized next to her. "Ayem," he said calmly.

"Seht! Did you know you've been harboring an incarnate in your Clockwork City?"

"Yes."

Ayem paused. "So...what? Just making use of a Prisoner before it's time to kill her?"

"Not exactly. Please give her back her ring and dispel your binding, and I will explain."

"Seht..." Ayem studied his face for any information. His expression was soft and barely guarded, not what she would expect in the presence of a mortal enemy, but rather like he was only in the presence of friends.

"You are worrying me, Ayem," he said with a faint smile. "What if the ring slips? Please give it back to our friend. She poses no threat to us."

She studied him for several seconds longer, and then hesitantly dispelled the bindings and handed the ring back to Ildari. Ildari quietly thanked her and relaxed her posture, but knew well enough to stay on her knees.

"Okay," Ayem said quietly, turning back to Seht. "Explain."

As promised, Seht explained. Though he left out some of the specific details that might affect the course of time, he surprised Iya by including some of the more sensitive details that she had expected him to omit.

Ayem looked devastated by the mere thought that she could kill him. "But, Seht...I would _never_. You know I would never."

"I know."

She didn't look reassured.

"Centuries will pass, circumstances will change," he said. "We know this."

"We do," she said softly. Then she turned to Ildari with a weak smile and offered a hand to help her up. "So, are you really Nerevar?"

Iya hesitantly smiled back and nodded as she stood up with Ayem's help.

Still holding her hand, Ayem traced Moon-and-Star with her finger now that it was safely on Iya. The movement was a little hesitant, but familiar to both of them, and there was comfort in that familiarity. Her other hand went up to Iya's chin, gently guiding their gazes to each other.

"I don't need to trust a ring," she said. She brought their lips together, and they kissed like they were once again married friends who had been through everything together. Giggling with relief as she broke away, Ayem said, "That's my Neht, all right. Your lips are little softer, and you're a fair bit more gray, but you're definitely you."

"You could have saved us all a lot of trouble and started with that," Iya teased, though her voice was still quiet and gentle.

"Oh, shut up." Ayem lifted her up and spun her around as she began to levitate again. She buried her face in the curve of Iya's neck, as if she could possibly hide the fact that she was crying, and as if she were the only one. Iya ran a hand through her hair and kissed the top of her head. Ayem looked back up and brushed the tears from Iya's face instead of her own, and kissed her again.

"It's just _so_ good to see you without having to...well, kill you."

"I am likewise a fan of not getting killed," Iya said. Then she added more quietly, "But, I suppose we're even on that front now."

Before she could fully process the pain associated with that, Ayem felt a mental nudge from Seht. Realizing that he likely wanted to talk to her alone, she said to Iya, "Would you stay in the Temple for a few days? I'm sure Seht and I can create some sort of distraction to delay Vox by a little while." She waved the doors open to allow her Hands inside. "My Hands will arrange for you the finest quarters. Go get that adventurer stink off of you, and I will be by to check in with you shortly, hm?"

She shut the doors again when Iya and her Hands had left, and turned to Seht.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

Ayem nodded and wiped her eyes, letting her energized persona fall slightly. "You've known about this for some time, haven't you?" she asked softly.

"The events surrounding our decline? Yes."

She floated to him for a hug. "How could I just kill you? That doesn't make any sense. Are you sure that's what happens?"

"Certainty is difficult to achieve, but I have not been able to model a scenario in which you do not kill me. And now that Iya, a Prisoner, is involved, I think this is the only timeline that can happen."

She sighed against his shoulder. "I hate that. I don't want to kill you."

"Would it help if I said that you _will_ want to kill me?"

"Hardly!" Ayem laughed darkly and then pulled away from the hug to converse better. "Does Vehk know about her?"

"Not to my knowledge, and it must stay that way if at all possible."

"Do you really think Vehk won't notice a glaring darkness in hir perception?"

"I am sure ze will, but maybe it will take hir longer to figure out what is going on. At least, that is my hope."

"And if ze does figure it out?"

"Then I hope I arrive before ze kills her. And I hope that the timeline will not be too irreparably damaged, but I suspect Azura knew what she was doing and would not have sent Ildari back if there were too great a risk."

"I don't suppose you'll un-hide her from me?"

"That would not be wise. Truly, none of us should be connected to her, but somebody has to keep an eye on her, and taking over for Azura is my responsibility."

She nodded understandingly.

"I will say this: Iya has been desperate to see you and talk to you openly. As much as she is worried about how your discovery will affect the timeline, she is also incredibly relieved and excited to have this opportunity. I will also say that she is pretty cute in this life." He kissed Ayem on the cheek and gave her a smile and a nudge. "Go see her."


	8. My Nerevar, returned to me at last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iya and Ayem spend some time together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> > "How long I have waited for this! My Nerevar, returned to me at last! I have watched from my Temple as others have made the claim, and I have seen them fall. I believe now that you are the one who was prophesied."
>> 
>> Almalexia, TES III: Morrowind (Tribunal)

"Ildari, dear," Ayem's melodic voice came floating in from the direction of the bedroom. "Are you decent?"

Iya looked down at the towel that was wrapped around her waist while she applied an herbal lotion to herself after her bath, hoping that the scent would be enough to mask any remaining "adventurer stink."

"Not especially," she replied.

"May I come in?" Ayem asked anyway.

"If you'd like."

Ayem appeared in the doorway and crossed the room with gentle steps—or maybe she was still floating and just mimicking a walking motion. There was enough grace in her movements for that to be true. Her smile contained all the hesitant excitement that Iya felt, but Iya suddenly found herself nervous to be half-naked in the Blessed Almalexia's breathtaking presence. It didn't help that Ayem had changed out of her armor and into a light, flowing dress.

"What's wrong?" Ayem asked, detecting her nervousness.

Iya shook her head and laughed self-consciously. "You're just really pretty."

Ayem laughed and finished closing the gap between them with a few bounding steps, ending with her hands around Iya's waist.

"Look at _you_," she said. Her eyes traveled all over Iya's exposed skin, ending on her face. Iya blushed and broke eye contact.

Ayem tilted her head in concern. "Well, that's new. You've never been embarrassed around me. Are you sure you're okay?"

Iya nodded, but folded her arms across her chest. She kissed Ayem on the nose and said, "Let me get dressed."

After Ayem left, Iya finished putting the lotion on and then clothed herself in a dress that had been provided for her by the Hands of Almalexia. She considered tying her hair back into a quick bun, but opted instead to let it hang down by her shoulders. When she emerged, Ayem was sitting casually on the bed waiting for her.

"Hey," Ayem said with a soft smile.

"Hey." Iya joined her on the bed.

"So, are you okay?" Ayem asked, gently tracing her fingers over Iya's hand. "Seeing me again, I mean. I know our last meeting from your temporal perspective wasn't exactly friendly. I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to avoid me altogether."

"What? Ayem, I'm absolutely overjoyed to be seeing you again! I can't even tell you how valuable it is to...to _finally_..." She trailed off as her voice broke. "Sorry..."

Ayem pulled her into a hug. "Don't be, my friend. Point taken."

"Are _you_ okay?" Iya asked after a moment, sitting back. "I mean, I'm the one who...who killed you. If anyone has the right to be upset—"

"Shh," Ayem placed a finger on her lips to interrupt her worrying. "You had to. I can hardly be upset with anyone but myself."

"Right," Iya said quietly.

"So, why all the hesitation?" Ayem probed, resting her chin on Iya's shoulder.

Iya ran a hand through Ayem's hair as she thought about the response. "I don't know. I was just really nervous, and really excited. And also really nervous. I didn't want you to figure out who I am, because that's obviously bad, but I also really did want you to, because I missed you so much."

"But that's out of the way now. Why were you still nervous earlier when you weren't dressed?"

Iya blushed again. "I don't know. It's like I said. You're _really_ pretty. And, I was just standing all exposed for you as if I were trying to impress you, when you're an entire goddess and I'm just some mer..."

"I didn't think you were _trying_ to impress me," Ayem said. "Do you have any idea how many mer I've seen naked? Way, way more than you can probably imagine. Certainly more than I would like. It comes with the job. Every prayer or prayer-like thought reaches us. Every rushed prayer while someone is getting dressed or bathing, every time someone cries out to the Three at the height of pleasure, we receive it. It doesn't even faze me anymore, honestly. But guess what? You still did. You're not just some mer, you're my Neht—my Iya." She kissed her on the nose. "And, by the way, my Iya, is it true that you got dressed up for me?"

Still blushing, Iya said, "Of course. I can't exactly wear my adventuring armor to see the Sacred Lady."

A smile curved across Ayem's lips. "Ildari, do you have a crush on me?"

"What? No!" Iya said with a laugh. "I don't get crushes."

"Since when?"

"Since this life."

"Well, you're sure acting like you have a crush on me."

"That must just be...residual."

"Residual?" Ayem's eyes widened. "_Did_ you have a crush on me?"

"Ayem, we were married."

"That's not an answer! We were married as friends, for political reasons. Did you really have a crush on me?"

Iya flopped down onto the bed with her hands on her head. "I can't believe you're just figuring this out."

Ayem giggled and lay down next to her, propping herself up on an elbow. She traced Iya's torso with her free hand. "Oh Iya, you are just too cute."

"You're acting like I'm the one who should be embarrassed here." She rolled onto her side and poked Ayem in the chest. "_You're_ the one who took three thousand years to figure out that your own spouse had a crush on you. Wipe that smirk off your face!"

"Absolutely not. You'll have to do it yourself."

"No problem," Iya muttered.

Her lips found Ayem's with the certainty and familiarity that would have been expected if they'd truly been together for millennia, but with an eagerness that reflected how long they had been apart. Ayem met the kiss with equal intensity, and opened her mouth slightly to let her tongue flick against Iya's lips, and then against her tongue as Iya welcomed the advance. After another minute or so, she pulled back, tugging gently on Iya's lip with her teeth, and giggled as she watched Iya open her eyes and reveal the fire behind them.

She pushed Iya onto her back and pulled her dress off, and then her own, before positioning herself on top of her. The kisses continued, but they were no longer restricted to each others' lips. Ayem's tongue toured Iya's body, with the occasional appearance from her lips—and sometimes her teeth—to keep things interesting. She continued lower and lower before anchoring herself between Iya's legs and letting her fingers help out where her tongue couldn't reach.

She waved a sound barrier around the room when Iya responded to the touch of her mouth—something she should have done earlier, she realized, but better late than never. Iya squirmed under her, and she held her down as Iya's pleasure climbed, peaked, fell, and climbed again.

"I like this new body of yours," Ayem commented.

Iya couldn't come up with an intelligent response, instead gripping Ayem's hair and breathing, "Sweet...merciful..."

Ayem's head popped up. "Hm? Sweet, merciful, who?" she teased.

Iya laughed breathlessly. "Ayem..."

"'Ayem?' Well, that's ambiguous. I can think of two icons of mercy that both start with an ayem." She slowly, teasingly dragged the tip of her tongue in circles around Iya's clit.

"Sweet Ayem..." Iya moaned.

"You can do better than that." She closed her lips and sucked.

"_Almalexia._"

Ayem hummed with delight. "That's what I like to hear."

She returned to her previous pace. Iya's hips fought involuntarily against her restraint.

"Sweet Almalexia," Iya breathed. "_Merciful_ Almalexia."

More hums of approval came from between her legs.

"Wonderful, beautiful, awesome, _divine_—ah!" She tensed and gasped as Ayem hit a particularly sensitive spot. "_Almalexia!_"

"Less poetry," Ayem ordered. "More screaming my name."

Ildari obeyed, repeating Almalexia's name like a spell with every gasp and every moan until she couldn't take anymore. She tapped Ayem's shoulder to tell her to slow down and tugged at her arms, begging for a kiss.

As if to show her appreciation, she put as much energy as she could behind the kiss despite her fatigue, tasting herself in Ayem's mouth. With one hand, she pulled Ayem closer, while the other traveled, pausing at her breast and then going lower, hoping to return the gesture. Ayem caught her hand and brought it back up to her lips, kissing her fingers.

"Not now," she said softly. "You've had a big day, my champion. You need to get some rest, and _then_ maybe you can see just what divinity has done to my stamina."

Iya was intrigued, but she couldn't disagree that she needed some rest. She smiled when Ayem pulled her to her chest. She was filled with warmth to be so close to her again, and she was sure it was not just the deliberate energy that Ayem gave off, or her own post-orgasm euphoria. She almost dozed off in the comfort of her arms.

"Oh!" Ayem said suddenly, jarring Iya awake. "I almost forgot: you're mortal. You need to eat, don't you?"

"Oh," Iya said with less intensity. "Yeah. I think I do."

Ayem kissed her on the forehead and gently removed herself from under her. She threw her dress back on, tied her hair back, and returned to her levitating position.

"I will be back shortly with something better than that nutriment paste you've been eating."

"Mm, you really know how to excite a mer."

Ayem laughed and came back down for one more kiss before she left. "See you soon, Iya dear."


	9. Preparing for Coldharbour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari gets ready to end the Planemeld and reclaim her soul.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I basically skipped over the main quest, but that's because this isn't supposed to be so much a story about ESO as a story about Iya.

A few months into her adventures, Ildari once again met the Prophet—who had revealed himself to be the former Emperor Varen Aquilarios during their adventures—and his Companions in the Harborage. Now that they had retrieved the Amulet of Kings, it was nearing the time to take the fight back to Coldharbour. Varen advised her to join up with a group who was planning on going there to stop the Planemeld.

Not long after she left the Harborage, the famed mage Vanus Galerion appeared to her in a projection and asked her to meet him in Mournhold. She agreed, but decided to first stop at the Clockwork City to talk to Seht, just in case Vanus was going to expect her to leave for Coldharbour immediately.

* * *

Seht had expected Iya to come see him. He invited her to his quarters that evening to discuss the situation after emerging from the Cogitum. As usual, despite Iya's worry (or perhaps because of it), they started with business before moving onto the more difficult topics.

"Vanus has briefed us on his plans," Seht said. "He hopes that you will help him convince the leaders of each alliance to meet peacefully to discuss sending troops into Coldharbour. It is a bold plan, but it has merit, if it can succeed."

"Do you think it can succeed?" Iya asked. She sat in front of Seht while he braided and unbraided her hair, as was his tendency when faced with a problem that required his focus.

"The probability is small, but not negligible," he said. "I suspect that your diplomacy skills will prove useful."

"Let's assume it does work," Iya said. "You're pretty much the only other person who has been to Coldharbour to put Molag Bal in his place. Any tips?"

Seht thought for a moment. "Your task is very different from what mine was. I went to Coldharbour to make an agreement with the Princes; you are going to end the Planemeld and reclaim your soul."

"So what you're saying is that I have the easy job compared to yours?"

He laughed. "I suppose that is one way to look at it. I also wouldn't think to offer you advice on diplomacy, considering that when I went to Coldharbour, I longed for your advice."

Iya affectionately bumped her head against Seht's chest in response. He kissed her forehead and then nudged her back upright so that he could keep braiding her hair.

"You are also already familiar with Deadra," he continued.

"I've never fought a Daedric Prince, though."

"True, but you have fought gods."

Iya sighed quietly. "True."

"You might even be just fine even without the divine energy your companions plan to give you, but it will undoubtedly help your chances." He stopped braiding her hair and wrapped his arms around her. "I will offer you one piece of advice: Remember that you are not alone."

Iya turned partway around to look at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I know that you know this," he said, "but I suspect that in your time since Nerevar, you have had to learn to rely only on yourself for the sake of your survival. Try to resist the urge to be independent, and instead rely on your friends and allies. Many people are going willingly into this fight with you, but despite their courage and resolve, they will be terrified. They will look to you for inspiration. Be the leader they need."

Iya nodded pensively, and then twisted the rest of the way around and threw her arms around Seht, pressing her face into his chest.

"Thanks," she said softly.

"Of course," he replied with equal softness. "How do you feel?"

"Dread, mostly. I'm scared too, but more than that, I just really don't want to go back to Coldharbour," Iya said. "I'm also afraid to wonder what would happen if we fail and the world ends before I'm born."

"I think that is a scenario best avoided," Seht said. He chuckled when Iya looked at him with a dry smile. "In truth, I do not know what would happen, but I suspect it would only be one of our many concerns."

"I guess I can't argue with that," Iya said.

"Are you leaving in the morning?" Seht asked.

"That's the plan."

"Would you stay with me tonight?"

"I'd love that."

Seht smiled. "Will you see Ayem when you get to Mournhold?"

"I hope so," Iya said. "Could you let her know I'll be there, so that we can be sure to have a chance to see each other before I leave?"

"Gladly," Seht said.

"Thanks." She was quiet for a moment. "It's strange: I'm used to seeing Vehk before I go do something dangerous, but this time I can't. But on the other hand, I _can_ see you and Ayem, so that's nice. I just wish I could see all three of you for once."

Seht nodded and kissed her on the head, unsure of any helpful response.

"Hey, let's go to bed," Iya said. "I imagine I have quite a long day ahead of me."


	10. The House of Troubles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari and company end the Planemeld. Ildari fights Molag Bal and reclaims her soul. Then she goes to see her friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to way skim over the entire zone story in Coldharbour.

Iya left the Clockwork City early the next morning after spending the night with Seht. Despite the daunting task ahead of her, having the comfort of Seht's company helped her get at least a little bit of sleep. She stopped at the Temple when she arrived in Mournhold, and after several long kisses and encouraging words from Ayem, she continued to the Mages Guild to meet with Vanus.

It was relatively easy to get the alliance leaders to agree to a peaceful meeting. Convincing them to trust one another enough to send troops to Coldharbour, however, turned out to be impossible. Instead, they agreed to let the Fighters and Mages Guilds lead the assault, which was expedited when Molag Bal attacked the island.

Once in Coldharbour, she found a city where she met a woman who called herself "The Groundskeeper." The Groundskeeper showed her around the Hollow City and explained that it was once a city on Nirn whose population worshipped Meridia, until Molag Bal attacked and Meridia transported the city to Coldharbour with plans to eventually fight the realm's Prince.

Unfortunately, the group who had come through the portal with Iya had been scattered in transport. She spent the next several days searching for Vanus and the Ayleid King Lalorian Dynar, and any other mundials she could find.

When the forces were finally gathered, they made the final assault on Molag Bal's court. With the help of the Groundskeeper, who revealed herself to be Meridia, they were able to stop the planar vortex that was pulling Nirn and Coldharbour together, ending the Planemeld.

Of course, that was only halfway to a solution. They still needed to free the souls who had been trapped by Mannimarco, as Varen's projection reminded Ildari when she returned to the Hollow City.

* * *

Ildari rejoined the Five Companions at the Harborage to face Molag Bal directly. She had been briefed on what would happen: Tharn would use the Amulet of Kings to perform a ritual that would imbue Ildari with divine power from Akatosh (an idea so layered with irony that she couldn't help but laugh). Unfortunately, as the Amulet was essentially a soul gem, the ritual would require the life of one of the three remaining companions to be sacrificed.

Although it was an unfortunate decision that fell to Ildari to make, it was not a difficult one: she knew she had to choose Varen to be the sacrifice. Although she did not resent him for inadvertently causing the Planemeld as he expected her to, he was still the leader of the operation, a former Emperor, and he knew as well as Iya did that a ruler should be willing to die for their people. There was also the fact that he knew a little more about Iya's future than she was comfortable with. Besides, she wasn't just going to break up the budding couple.

One decision that she was not anticipating, however, came on their way into Molag Bal's temple, when they found Mannimarco. He was strapped to some sort of torture device, and the controls to release him were unprotected. He scoffed at Iya's offer to free him, and part of her wanted to just keep walking, but something made her stop and give the idea more consideration.

For one thing, she had heard of the King of Worms in her time. It was possible that she had an obligation to release him in order to keep the future intact. Part of her wished she could call on Azura to ask about time travel protocol, but she figured this would not be a good time. Instead, she decided to pull aside the self-styled "Prophet."

"Do the Scrolls say anything about him?" she asked Varen quietly.

"The Scrolls show many possible futures. Not all of them will come to pass."

"So that's a yes," Iya said with some impatience. "And since I do know of a future—my past—in which Mannimarco is alive, I probably have to free him."

"You are not bound by the Elder Scrolls, Vestige, nor do you owe Mannimarco anything. I'm sure I needn't remind you that he killed you."

Iya waved a hand dismissively. "Plenty of people have killed me, and I'm best friends with some of them. Mannimarco is nothing special."

She sighed. Varen was about as helpful as she would have expected Azura to be. After mulling it over for a few more seconds, she decided that she wasn't willing to subject another person to being a Daedric Prince's plaything for eternity. Spending even a few thousand years as Azura's toy had been difficult on her, and that was as the honored champion of one of the nicer Princes. Before she could think better of it, she returned to the table where Mannimarco was strapped in and released the controls, ignoring her allies' complaints and the ungrateful Worm King's promises that she would regret her decision.

* * *

Varen accepted his sacrifice with grace when the time came. Ildari had some doubts about Akatosh's willingness to imbue a Daedra worshipper with divine power, but the ritual went smoothly. She didn't necessarily feel like she had more magicka to work with, but she found that she was practically melting Molag Bal's minions with her spells.

Molag Bal himself was a little more of a challenge, but even he was defeated. After a burst of light, Ildari was in an unfamiliar and colorful place. When Meridia's voice called to her and told her to reclaim her soul, she realized she must be in the Colored Rooms.

She reached out and touched the thing that was apparently her soul, and felt as if she was suddenly experiencing everything in more detail. She felt a wave of emotions, but realized that they were all emotions that she had been feeling, just more accessible now. She wanted to stretch and jump and scream and laugh, but it would have to wait until she got back to Nirn.

Molag Bal admitted temporary defeat, but promised that there was more trouble to come for Nirn. The Lady of Light brushed off his warnings and sent him back to Coldharbour before turning to Ildari. They debriefed, and Meridia confirmed that the stolen souls had been released and Nirn was safe from the Planemeld.

* * *

Iya's first stop after returning to the Harborage was to Mournhold. A Hand of Almalexia greeted her with a bow at the entrance to the Temple.

"Sera Ildari! The Sacred Lady has heard of your triumph over the Lord of Schemes and wishes to thank you. She awaits you in her cloister."

Iya thanked the Hand and made her way to Ayem's cloister, where the Sacred Lady was indeed waiting for her with a bright smile. As soon as Iya entered and closed the door behind her, Ayem dropped to her feet and sprinted across the room, throwing herself into Iya's arms.

"Iya! You did it!" she said into Iya's shoulder.

Before Iya could respond, Ayem lifted her face back up and kissed her.

"You saved the world, Iya!" She kissed her again. "You _literally_ saved the entire world!" Another kiss. "You're..._amazing!_" A longer kiss.

Iya spent the night and much of the next day with Ayem before returning to the Clockwork City and allowing Ayem to return to her Temple business.

Seht was equally happy to see her, though he showed it less outwardly than Ayem did. Still, his hug was just as tight. He had been informed that she was coming back and made a point of being available that evening so that they could have dinner.

"'Verminous Vintage,'" Iya read from the label of the bottle of wine Seht had brought to the table. "Is this even allowed?"

"It is not...encouraged," Seht replied with a faint mischievous smile.

Iya laughed and leaned up against him as they shared their meal. There was no nutriment paste this time. Seht had declared it a special occasion and brought in food from Nirn Above, as well as some of the "real" food cultivated around the City. As they ate, Iya recounted her adventure through Coldharbour.

"Do you think Azura really planned for all of this?" she asked at the end.

"It is difficult to say. Azura rarely shares her intentions," Seht said. "On one hand, she considers Molag Bal her ally. On the other, destroying Nirn and enslaving its residents would have hurt her beloved servants."

Iya snorted.

Seht chuckled knowingly and continued. "I think it is likely that this was her plan."

"So she has one beloved servant killed again for the sake of the rest of them...I guess that's fair."

"In her rare defense," Seht said, "you weren't dead for very long."

She sighed. "I guess it's better than dying forever, but it's still pretty rude. Can't she just not kill me for once?"

"Let us hope that was the last time you will die for many, many years."

Iya raised her glass in agreement.

"What will you do now?" Seht asked.

"Finish my dinner. Then sleep."

He chuckled. "After that?"

Iya made a dramatic sigh. "Why do I always have to be _doing_ something? Maybe I'll explore or do some research or something."

"That counts as doing things, I would think."

"I guess. I just hope Azura gives me a little time off before I have to go off on her next adventure," she said. "That said, I wouldn't mind seeing Vehk."

"Vehk is getting anxious to see you, too," Seht said.

Iya raised her eyebrows. "Is ze?"

"Ze doesn't know who you are, exactly, but ze has been curious about the mer-shaped void that Ayem has been sleeping with."

Iya nearly spit out her wine as she laughed. "That must look a bit strange."

"It seems she forgot to block herself off," he said with a small laugh of his own. "Just be careful. I would still advise you against going to Vivec until Azura gives you her orders."

"That seems reasonable." She finished her drink and climbed onto Seht's lap. "Time to sleep now."

Seht laughed and kissed her head. "Good night, Iya."

"Night, Seht."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might have some interlude chapters before jumping right into the Vvardenfell prologue, not sure yet.


	11. Orders intercepted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drabble-chapter where Seht intercepts Alessio Guillon, who is trying to enter the Clockwork City get a message to Ildari.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said I might wait before jumping into the Vvardenfell prologue, but most of the ideas I have involve Vvardenfell, so I decided to jump in.

Deep within Bamz-Amschend, Alessio Guillon closed his eyes and touched the celestiodrome. The warping sensation propelled him toward the Clockwork City, but stopped him abruptly in a liminal space.

A voice boomed through the non-place. “Why do you seek to defile my city, cultist of Azura?”

“Lord Sotha Sil,” Alessio responded. “The chief oracle of Azura in Wayrest has an urgent message for one of your residents.”

“I will tell Ildari to meet this oracle. The Clockwork City need not bear your Daedric influence. Return to the surface, Alessio.”

Before he could respond, Alessio was sent warping back to Mournhold.


	12. Fear not, for I am watchful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari meets with Azura to help address a threat to her oracles.

“Hey, Seht,” Iya said, looking up from her work. It was unusual for Sotha Sil to seek her out in her lab during the day. “What’s up?”

“I intercepted an Azuran cultist who was trying to enter the city. He said that Azura’s chief oracle has an urgent message for you in Wayrest. I suspect the Prince is ready to deliver your orders.”

“Urgent, but all the way in Wayrest?” Iya asked. “You guys really keep a tight grip on your people, huh? I expected her to send an Ashlander or something.”

Seht smiled lightly. “I can open a portal for you when you are ready. I imagine the Lady of Twilight would not like to be kept waiting while you journey across the continent, though I am sure you can take some time to prepare.”

* * *

Ildari arrived at the Cloudy Dregs Inn in Wayrest the next day. The oracle, Rhea Opacarius, told her of disturbing visions: her colleagues were being abducted by Daedra—other than Azura, apparently—and held in pocket realms of Oblivion. As expected, she asked Ildari to speak with Azura. Apparently, there was an entire abbey nearby devoted to the Prince.

Ildari wandered around the city until late afternoon, killing time so that she could make it to Pariah Abbey at dusk. She realized with some surprise that she was fairly nervous, more than she had been when she first began her second era adventures. Perhaps it was that the novelty of the new time had worn off, or maybe it was because Azura may have intentionally gotten her killed in the interim. Whatever the reason, she made sure to wear formal attire and put on her rings (discreetly) before heading down the road to the abbey.

The appearance of the place also surprised her. It looked like a temple to the Divines, not like any Daedric shrine she was familiar with from Morrowind. Were it not for the worshippers in their cultist robes, she would have thought she was in the wrong place.

Once inside, however, there was no denying that it was a temple to Azura, as a statue of the Prince of Dawn and Dusk stood tall at the far end. She approached the statue and knelt before it.

“Rejoice, mortal,” the familiar voice boomed. “You are in the presence of the Lady of Twilight.”

Ildari thought carefully about how to respond. It could be unwise to say anything about her experiences so far in this time, as that could be taken as a slight. She decided to keep it simple.

“Thank you for summoning me, my Prince.”

Azura confirmed Rhea’s story, making no effort to hide her anger at the abductions. She instructed Ildari to collect Daedric essence and rescue her oracles.

The essence was not difficult to collect, as there were scamps littering the area. She even helped some of Azura’s worshippers deal with a threat from Vaermina in the process. When she had collected enough Daedric essence, she returned to the abbey to speak to Rhea.

Rhea began to explain the progress she had made in locating her colleagues, but was rudely interrupted by her own abduction. Ildari stood stunned for a moment after Rhea was pulled off to a pocket of Oblivion, until she noticed a note where Rhea had been standing. Apparently, Rhea had foreseen her abduction. The note contained the information Ildari needed to locate the void keys that could be imbued with the Daedric essence to rescue the oracles.

_Leave it to an Azuran cultist to opt for the dramatic instead of just telling me upfront that she was about to be abducted,_ Iya thought.

She obtained the first void key from an Ayleid ruin called Rubble Butte in southern Bangkorai. It was not the sort of place she expected to find a pocket of Oblivion, and it gave no clues about who could be behind the abductions. The second location, where she found Rhea, was a shrine to Mephala in Stonefalls. That left Ildari with a sense of unease. Although Mephala was known for being complicated, Ildari would not have expected one of the Good Daedra to be conspiring against another so openly, especially if this all turned out to be linked to whatever great threat was coming to Vvardenfell. Perhaps it was meant to throw her off?

The third location left her even more confused. Though it was not a typical Daedric shrine, there was a note outside referring to the Lady of the Twilight, and the void key was guarded by a winged twilight. It seemed that this place was home to worshippers of none other than Prince Azura herself.

This whole situation left Ildari with a bad feeling. Two explanations seemed likely. The first, which was more likely but less risky, was that whoever was behind the abductions intentionally chose locations that would hide their identity. The second possibility was that Azura had abducted her own oracles to detract attention from herself as part of some larger plot, and that she was coordinating with Mephala. That one was less likely, but it would have hefty implications if true. If this was the threat to Vvardenfell that Iya had been warned of, and Azura and Mephala were both involved, then Boethiah likely would be as well. And the fact that they had specifically brought their thrice-blessed champion back in time gave her all the more reason to worry.

* * *

Azura was uninterested in the details of where her oracles were hidden, which did nothing to settle Ildari’s worries. She was focused instead on retribution. She sent Ildari to a place in Shadowfen that Rhea had seen, to confront whoever was behind the abductions.

Ildari found the shrine and, with Rhea, found a journal that indicated that the Daedra involved, named Dyzera, had offered artifacts to a bandit in exchange for carrying out the abductions. Unfortunately for the bandit, the artifacts ultimately corrupted him and led him to regret his decisions. Ildari’s mind was put slightly at ease—if any Daedric Prince was known for making bad deals with mortals, it was Clavicus Vile.

She found the artifacts in the shrine to get Dyzera’s attention, and followed a portal into her realm. The realm was not how she imagined the Fields of Regret would look; it actually looked much like Morrowind, only darker. She would have thought it was Moonshadow if she hadn’t spent time there between lives.

Dyzera turned out to be a shrike, a lesser Daedra in the service of Nocturnal. Was this Evergloam, then? That would explain why one of the artifacts was a cowl, but Nocturnal was not necessarily known for making bargains with mortals. This was maddening. It seemed that every bit of information led only to more questions.

When Ildari had defeated Dyzera, she returned to the oracles, where Rhea was suddenly possessed by Azura and cloaked in golden light. Ildari almost wondered if she should feign surprise, but the other oracles simply knelt, as though this was a common occurrence from their perspective as well.

Azura relayed a warning of an oncoming “Daedric storm” that would threaten the entire world. Of course, she either could not or would not provide more detail than that, as was her way. Ildari tried to ask subtly what she should do next, but Azura remained cryptic.

“We’ll meet again soon, in a familiar land,” the Prince said. “Perhaps sooner than you’d like. Until then, walk in twilight.”


	13. Schemers scheme

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari and Seht try to figure out what's going on with the oncoming Daedric plot.

“How was your trip to Wayrest?” Seht asked the evening that Ildari returned.

“Confusing,” Iya said. “Concerning, maybe. Azura had some warnings about a big Daedric threat, but there were some parts that left me a little worried.”

“Other than the big Daedric threat?”

She laughed. “Well, that much was practically expected. What worries me is that she might be hiding more than usual.”

They sat down on Seht’s couch, and Iya recounted her discussions with Rhea and Azura and the abductions of the oracles.

“Based on the encounter with Dyzera, I would think the threat comes from either Clavicus Vile or Nocturnal. Maybe both, if that’s possible,” Iya said. “But here’s what bothers me: of the three locations where the void keys were held, one of them didn’t seem to be a Daedric shrine, and the other two were shrines to Azura and Mephala.”

Seht frowned as he made the connection. “Do you suspect that the Good Daedra are involved in whatever is going on?”

“I just don’t know,” Iya said. “It doesn’t make sense. Why would Azura abduct her own people?”

“How did Azura respond to the information that one of her oracles was being held in her own shrine?”

“She didn’t even seem interested in the locations.”

“Hmm. That neither helps nor hurts her case,” he said pensively. “Did you see anything that would point to Boethiah?”

“Not that I can think of, other than the fact that this seems to be one big plot.”

Seht thought for another moment. “If all Three are involved, then the fact that they specifically brought you back is alarming. But you’ve already fulfilled the Nerevarine prophecies. They would not call on you to fulfill them again at an earlier time.” He gave an exasperated sigh. “Daedra are such infuriating beings. Not even I can parse their chaotic schemes.”

Iya nodded sympathetically.

“Did Azura say when you would need to proceed to Vvardenfell?” he asked.

“Of course not,” she laughed. “She just said we might meet again sooner than I’d like.”

“That could be any time,” Seht said, also laughing. “In that case, I would still advise you to stay away from Vvardenfell, or at least southern Vvardenfell, until you receive a clear sign, or formal invitation, or something of the like. I will stay attentive to Vivec and watch for anything that seems unusual or concerning.”

Iya nodded, her mind traveling back to the Good Daedra. She thought for a moment, and then said, “Do you think the old Three are really going to try to pit me against you guys again?”

“It is hard to say,” Seht said carefully. “So far, we only know of a threat to Vvardenfell, correct?”

Iya cringed. “Not exactly. I suppose it’s safe to tell you this, since Divayth told me—future Divayth, that is. Apparently, when I’m done dealing with whatever is going on in Vvardenfell, I’ll be coming back here to help with something else, which I’m beginning to assume will be related.”

“I see.” Seht frowned. “Help me, I presume?”

“I hope so. Divayth did say that you and he would need my help.”

“In that case, I am inclined to think that the old Three are not our enemies in this scenario. It seems unlikely that they would have you working against us at one step and with us at the next.”

She nodded. “That’s a good point. So do you think whoever is behind it just chose those locations to throw us off?”

“Most likely, though it would be wise to stay watchful for any opposing evidence.”

“Agreed,” Iya said. “So, Clavicus Vile or Nocturnal?”

“I can’t imagine what cause Nocturnal would have to attack Vvardenfell, and the use of bargains points to Vile, of course,” Seht said. “On the other hand, the realm you described sounds very much like Evergloam. Worse yet: neither of them is bound by the Coldharbour Compact.”

“Do you think it really could be both of them?”

“I do not wish to imagine it, but yes, I must admit that it is possible.”

“Who else isn’t bound by your compact?”

“The bards don’t sing the song in the third era?” Seht teased. “Even I find that it helps me keep track of them. As it goes, the compact included the Schemer, Hunger, Hunter, Scryer, Pariah, Destroyer, Raver, and Twilight. Or, more clearly, Molag Bal, the gracious host, Boethiah, Hircine, Hermaeus Mora, Malacath, Mehrunes Dagon, Sheogorath, and Azura. That leaves Clavicus Vile, Nocturnal, Mephala, Meridia, Namira, Peryite, Sanguine, and Vaermina, most of whom seem disinterested in the present threat.”

Iya ran through them all again in her head. “Why isn’t Mephala on the compact?”

Seht shrugged. “I suppose Mephala had bigger webs to spin, as it were.”

“That is weird, though, right? They’re the only one of the Good Daedra not included.”

“Of the Good and the Bad, in fact,” Seht said. “It does make Mephala a potential threat, but the bulk of the evidence still seems to be pointing toward either Clavicus Vile or Nocturnal, or both.”

“I guess we’d better prepare for anything, huh?”

“That would be wise, if a bit ambitious.”

She nodded contemplatively. Then she stood up, stretched, and leaned back down to kiss Seht on the cheek. “Thanks for your help. Let me know if you do figure anything out?”

“Of course,” Seht said. “Before you go, you may wish to know that Varuni has been looking for you.”

“Uh oh, am I in trouble again?”

Seht chuckled. “No, I think she just wants to be friends with you.”

“Ah, that’s much better than being in trouble,” Iya said. “I’ll seek her out tomorrow. Night, Seht.”

“Good night, Iya.”


	14. Dinner and speechcraft

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari seeks out Varuni after hearing that Varuni wants to be friends with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just love Varuni and I want her to be happy. She deserved a more fleshed-out story than she got in CWC. So I'm starting by giving her more friends.

“Serjo Varuni?” Ildari said as she entered Varuni’s laboratory at the end of the work day.

Varuni looked up and gave a surprised smile. “Ah, greetings, ser—_muth_sera,” she corrected herself. “Sorry, I almost forgot you’re a saint.”

“Oh, no, please!” Ildari waved her hands uncomfortably. “As much as I appreciate my friends’ desire to honor me, it is very strange to be called a saint, especially considering that I’m alive. Besides, there’s no need to call unnecessary attention to me. Even ‘serjo’ could raise eyebrows around here.”

Varuni nodded understandingly. “Of course. How can I help you, Sera Ildari?”

“Actually, I was wondering the same for you. I heard you’ve been looking for me.”

Varuni looked surprised. “You heard that? I suppose I have been, but I didn’t know I was being that obvious about it.” She paused as a realization crossed her face. “Lord Seht told you, didn’t he?”

Ildari nodded.

“Of course he did,” Varuni said with a small laugh. “Nothing is hidden from the Light of Knowledge, after all. Truthfully, I had been hoping we could be friends, childish as that sounds out loud. I’m just finishing up here. Perhaps you’d like to join me at The Cloisters for dinner?”

“That sounds great.”

* * *

“So, how have you been handling the recent divine revelations, so to speak?” Ildari asked over their bowls of nutriment paste.

“It is slightly easier to deal with than I would have expected, but nonetheless strange. World-shaking, if I’m being honest,” Varuni said. “And Luciana, dear as she is to me, has been of little help. She seems to have taken everything in stride. Product of growing up under a different pantheon, I suppose.”

“Have you talked to Seht at all?”

“Oh, no, there’s no need for that!” She waved her hands dismissively.

Iya tilted her head, giving Varuni a look of mild amusement. “Why not? He said you could.”

“Well, yes, but…” Varuni trailed off and shook her head. “He has much more important things to be worrying about, I’m certain. Besides, I wouldn’t want him to think he can’t trust me.”

“Seht may seem cryptic, but he isn’t really one to say things he doesn’t mean,” Iya said. “If anything, he may trust you more for coming to him when you need his assistance.”

“That…that can’t be. No. He’s much too busy for the likes of me.”

“Maybe you don’t realize the magnitude of the information he trusted you with,” Iya said carefully. “Believe me: you should absolutely take it as a sign that you are important to him. I’m sure he would be overjoyed to help you through anything.”

Varuni nodded contemplatively, and then chuckled. “I can’t imagine an overjoyed Lord Seht.”

“He doesn’t show it very clearly, especially for his subjects, but if you look carefully you can see it in his eyes.” She smiled. “I know it’s probably weird to think about, but he is a person. A god too, sure, but also a person.”

“I suppose that’s true in a sense, but it feels blasphemous to acknowledge it. But then, one could argue that that was the core of his…revelation, as you put it.”

“It seems like it’s something he wants you to understand.”

Varuni gave a laughing sigh. “You know, I can handle machine theory, aurbic composition, magical mechanics, orthodox theology, but seeing my god as a person? That’s turning out to be quite the challenge.”

“You’ve said yourself that he never puts more burden on any gear than they can handle. But he also knows that in a machine, the gears support each other. And all are supported by the mainspring.”

“Spoken like a Clockwork Apostle,” she laughed. “All right, maybe I will reach out to him. At least, I will try to get myself to do so.”

“I’m sure that’s all he can ask.”

They were quiet for a few moments while they ate, until Varuni spoke again.

“You know him well, don’t you? Better than almost anyone does, I’d bet.”

“I suppose I do,” Iya said. “After Ayem and Vehk, I’m sure, and certainly after Divayth, but otherwise, yes.”

“Wow…That’s hard to imagine.”

“What is?”

“Knowing Seht. I mean, truly knowing him.”

“Honestly, I think a lot of that stuff about how he’s ‘inscrutable’ and ‘unknowable’ is overstated. He displays his emotions differently from most people, which can make him a little hard to read at first, and he’s certainly brilliant, which can make it difficult to follow his trains of thought. But really, once you get to know him, he’s not that hard to understand.” She shrugged. “But maybe he gives off that image on purpose.”

“But how could one get to know him in the first place? He spends so much time in the Cogitum Centralis, and even when he’s not there, he doesn’t exactly interact with his people on familiar terms. I’ve been serving him for over a century, and that meeting was the first time we’ve ever spoken directly,” Varuni said. Then she quickly added, “Not that I’m criticizing him, of course.”

“Well, _I’ve_ criticized him for it, anyway.” She laughed when Varuni looked momentarily horrified. “Really, you should try it sometime. He appreciates honest feedback.”

“From you, maybe, but you’re special.”

“Okay, look at Luciana, then. She’s pulled her weapon on him before, and now she’s practically his second-in-command.”

Varuni thought about that for a moment. “I suppose you’re right, but it still feels so…unimaginable. Maybe for someone with a stronger personality, but me?”

“Seht is a scholar. He knows the value of having his assumptions and conclusions challenged. And beyond that, he’s a leader, and he knows that effective leaders need people to question them,” Iya said. “Why do you think the Tribunal was formed in the first place?”

“To advise you,” Varuni said quietly, nodding.

“Exactly. And there’s no point in an advisor who goes along with everything the leader does without question. Now Seht needs advisors, but the Clockwork Apostles all defer to his word as the absolute truth.”

“But that’s our duty as subjects and devotees.”

“Is it?” Iya asked. “That might be true of the average auxiliary, but you?”

“But why me? I do well because I avoid confrontation. Why not anyone else on the Congress of Calibration? Gascone, for example?”

Iya raised her eyebrows. “Do you really think Gascone is suited for that sort of job? Seht trusted only you and Luciana with information that even Archcanon Tarvus might not know.”

“Because we were the ones who approached you about your background.”

“Imagine that,” Iya teased gently. “It’s almost as if you take initiative and he respects you for it.”

“Well, maybe, but…” her face flushed as she fumbled for words. “I’m sure he only revealed those things to me because I was there.”

“Sure, yeah, that sounds like Seht: making decisions that could unravel Dunmeri society as we know it based on sheer convenience, rather than careful deliberation.”

“Stop doing that!” Varuni laughed, jabbing her spoon at Ildari. “I see your sarcasm and your persuasive tongue!”

Iya giggled. “Fine, fine. Maybe he just didn’t want to send you away.”

“Or maybe he knew I would keep inquiring,” Varuni said thoughtfully.

Iya spread her arms triumphantly. “There you go.”

“I—What? Oh, that does prove your point, doesn’t it? Slag it.” She laughed again. “Fine. You win.”

“Hopefully you win, too,” Iya said. “And so does Seht, and the Clockwork City, and maybe all of Morrowind, and Tamriel, and even all of Nirn.”

Varuni looked overwhelmed, to say the least. “What burden have you just talked me into, Ildari?”

“Oh, don’t think of it like that! Think of it as becoming Seht’s friend. Isn’t that what you wanted?”

“I didn’t even dare want that. Now you’ve made me feel like it’s my responsibility.”

“Well,” Iya shrugged, “it is, in a way. But it’s a happy responsibility, I hope.”

“It is.” Varuni’s eyes were distant, but she fixed them back on Ildari after a moment. “Truly, it is. Thank you.”

“Hey, you wanted to make one friend, but now it looks like you’ll be making two. I’d call that a successful endeavor, wouldn’t you?”

Varuni smiled. “Definitely. Let’s do this again sometime.”


	15. To Morrowind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari goes to Vvardenfell (but not by carriage or by boat).

"Hey Seht, do you know a Canon Llevule?" Iya asked from the entrance to Seht's lab.

Seht looked up from his workbench. "Yes, he's one of Vehk's priests. Why do you ask?"

"You mentioned a formal invitation to Vvardenfell, and I think it just came." She crossed the room and handed him a letter from Canon Llevule. Apparently, Vivec was interested in meeting her.

Seht read the letter. "Interesting. I have noticed that Vehk has seemed a little quiet lately; I was going to mention it to you if ze stayed that way." He handed it back. "That co-occurrence concerns me. You should not rule out the possibility that this could be a trap."

"Never," she said. "Do you know why ze might be quiet?"

"No, but I suspect it could have to do with this Daedric plot."

Iya said forced a smile to hide her disappointment. "For just a second, I almost let myself hope I'd get to see hir under happy circumstances." She knew it was irrational to be upset, but she hadn't seen her friend in almost a year, and it would be difficult to see hir now, facing some mostly-unknown threat, without being able to so much as interact with hir on a personal level.

Seht ran a cleaning spell over his hand to get the grease off and placed it on her arm. He smiled in an attempt to reassure her. "You will. If not now, then after you have dealt with this Daedric threat. Just stay safe, Iya."

* * *

Seht attuned Iya to the wayshrine in Seyda Neen at her request; she did not want to relive the transport by boat. When she arrived, she wasn't sure if she should be surprised to find that it looked much the same as it would in the late third era, even if Arille's Tradehouse was under different ownership. She glanced around for any signs of Azura, but was distracted when she noticed some people at the end of the road. One was lying down, presumably injured, while others hovered over them. She ran ahead to them to offer her help.

One woman, Canon Valasa, told her that they had been on a mission for Vivec at the Andrano ancestral tomb, but were overwhelmed when they were attacked by Daedra. As soon as Ildari offered to meet with the priest who was still at the tomb, the woman across from Valasa began to levitate and glow with golden light.

_Ah, there we go,_ Iya thought.

"BY DAWN AND DUSK, EVIL CREEPS THROUGH THE SHADOWS OF MY BELOVED VVARDENFELL. BUT AN OUTLANDER ARRIVES TO AID MY PEOPLE, JUST AS I HAVE FORESEEN."

It was bold, even for Azura, to make such a blatant display in front of Vivec's devotees, but it did give Ildari a convincing sign that she was on the right path.

* * *

She met Canon Llevule at his ancestral tomb. He seemed a little too frazzled to be involved with this Daedric business, but she kept an eye on him as they fought their way through regardless. When they reached the central chamber, Llevule asked Ildari to ask Vivec's questions while he focused on the summoning ritual. The questions—even before they received answers—proved insightful to Ildari, even more than they were to Llevule.

"The Heart of the World, the key to ascension: should I be filled with apprehension?" she asked the spirit. Clearly, Vivec was asking whether the Heart of Lorkhan was safe. She knew that the Tribunal would still have access to it until the end of the era, but the fact that Vivec was asking troubled her.

"Has the enemy of old returned, so devious and bold?" The enemy in question was almost certainly Voryn. At least, that's what her retrospective lens suggested. She realized ze could also be asking about the Dwemer, maybe more specifically Dumac or Kagrenac. But given the previous question, it was definitely someone who had to do with the Heart.

"Did Sotha Sil in his unending crusade know our divinity would shrivel and fade?" So, hir divinity was fading? That would explain the previous questions, but it did not soothe her worries in the slightest.

The ancestor assured them that the Heart was safe and that either Dagoth Ur or the Dwemer were not behind the current crisis, and that the Tribunal would not experience the type of loss Vivec was worried about until—well, Ildari knew when that would happen.

When they reconvened outside the tomb, Llevule invited Ildari to help present the answers to Vivec. She did her best to hide her nervousness when she agreed to meet him at the palace. When leaving, she instinctively went to cast intervention, but caught herself and began walking. Luckily, it was not a long trip.

The first thing she noticed upon arriving at the city was that there were significantly fewer cantons than she was used to. Checking a map, it seemed as though only the Saints' cantons and the temple and palace had been built, though more were being constructed. That would make life a little easier.

Then she looked up and noticed the Ministry of Truth—or, she supposed, right now it was just Baar Dau. It was much higher in the sky than she was used to. She doubted she could levitate to it safely if she wanted to, even if levitation worked the same was now as it had in her home time. She wondered if it was actually always falling, just very slowly, slower than the average person would notice in their lifetime.

She made her way through the city and changed into formal wear before heading up the familiar set of many, many stairs. She met Llevule by the entrance to the palace and set her gaze on Vivec for what felt like the first time again. Like Ayem, Vehk was more radiant now than ze would be in the third era, even before she had unbound the Heart. But ze did have a look of fatigue about hir that worried her.

Ildari and Llevule recounted the perils of their trek through the Andrano ancestral tomb. Vivec thanked them both and then turned hir attention on Ildari specifically.

"You are the one we sent for."

"I am, muthsera," she said. That acknowledgment gave her some reassurance; evidently, the invitation was sent under Vivec's direction after all.

"And already you prove helpful. Thank you, and welcome to my city. Perhaps you can be of more help."

"I would be honored to serve you, muthsera."

Ze instructed her to retrieve a blessing stone containing some of hir divine energy from the canton construction site in order for hir to perform a divination ritual and look further into the Daedric threat. She agreed, and Vivec's smile glowed almost as brightly as hir head, but Iya knew well enough not to trust that without question. Although ze had not pointed out her odd blocked-off state, she knew it was on hir mind, and that ze would be watching her closely.

She knew that in this case, the best way to get Vehk's trust would be to disclose her present collaboration with Azura. If that truth were to come out on its own, the consequences could be dire.

"You should know, muthsera, that the Prince Azura presented a prophecy when I arrived in Seyda Neen and met up with your Canon and Armiger. She indicated that these Daedric incursions were also offensive to her, but that I would help stop them," she explained. "She also spoke to me in anticipation of my arrival on Vvardenfell, warning me of the threat. Unfortunately, the detail I have is nearly negligible." She longed for her ring Moon-and-Star as she spoke. Her Dunmeris felt clunky and stilted, as if in the wrong period and register, and she had to focus in order to not shift further back in time and into Chimeris, as she frequently did with her friend in their time.

Vehk's eyes narrowed slightly at the mention of Azura's involvement, but ze hid most of hir thoughts well. "It is possible that what concerns me would concern the Prince of Dawn and Dusk as well. However, it is also possible that she is the source of my concerns. Regardless, thank you for telling me this."

* * *

Ildari returned with the blessing stone, and Vivec and hir Archcanon began the ritual. Images of Daedric cultists, an Ashlander, and a Clockwork mage appeared in the divination pool, but the ritual ended abruptly, as though it had been interrupted by an outside—or inside—source. Ildari stayed behind to speak with Vivec after the Archcanon left to reflect on the findings. It seemed that ze was ready to disclose more about the situation that concerned hir.

"Listen well and speak not a word!" ze said. "My divine energy, it drains away. Whether from illness or foul malady, I know not. You must travel the land and seek answers on my behalf."

It was a sobering thought, even to the Nerevarine. She agreed to help hir investigate the mystery, starting by talking to Archcanon Tarvus about the results of the ritual. She wished she could stay with Vehk and provide the support of a friend, but she knew that was not possible right now. Instead, she hid her reluctance and took her leave with a bow before seeking out the Archcanon.


	16. Memories of the future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari learns that someone she once met in the Cavern of the Incarnate is currently alive and claiming to be the Nerevarine. Then she goes to consult with the mer who indirectly killed Sotha Sil.

Archcanon Tarvus sent Ildari to investigate what clues they did get from the divination ritual. Her first stop was at a mine near Balmora, where she learned that some Daedric cultists had been in possession of a staff that was then stolen by Ashlanders. She decided to go to Ald’ruhn next, which was apparently still Ashlander territory.

When she arrived in the shadow of Skar, she encountered a mer fighting off a number of other Ashlanders. Ildari went to help, but she had it under control before Ildari could even get her staff out. The mer, who introduced herself as Seryn, regarded Ildari with natural suspicion, but asked for her help finding her brother Chodala, who was apparently the Urshilaku Ashkhan.

Ildari agreed and swept stealthily through the Red Exiles’ camp, but saw no sign of the Ashkhan. She did, however, find minutes from a meeting with Chodala. On glancing them over, she learned that this Chodala was indeed Conoon Chodala, whose spirit she had met in the Cavern of the Incarnate during the third trial on the way to becoming the Nerevarine. She wanted to laugh. The hubris! Part of her wished she could just pull out her ring and shut down his claims, but she knew she would have to do this the hard way.

She snaked her way back to Seryn and showed her the note. Seryn seemed surprised and upset by her brother’s claim—a relatable sentiment from Ildari’s perspective, especially knowing how it would turn out. When Iya asked for more information about Chodala, Seryn told her about a staff that he had acquired on a recent trip into the wilderness. Apparently the staff made him incredibly powerful, and he used it as justification for his claim as Nerevarine.

Seryn didn’t seem to know much else about the staff, but Ildari suspected that it might be the same one taken from the cultists in the Shulk mine near Balmora. She thanked Seryn for her help and headed for the wayshrine.

The last stop on her list was Odirniran, a Velothi tower near Molag Mar, to talk to someone else from her past: the clockwork mage named Barilzar. She wanted to make a detour in the Clockwork City to ask Seht to brief her on the fully-living version of the mer she only knew as a lich, but she knew Vehk was relying on her, and so she recalled to Vivec and took a silt strider to Molag Mar.

It was getting late, and she knew she would need her energy in order to deal with Barilzar, and so she stayed at the Penitent Pilgrim for the night. Unfortunately, her body did not seem to understand her need for sleep, as she tossed and turned all night, worrying about her upcoming encounter.

He had been a powerful lich when they last met, adamant about protecting his prized Mazed Band. She still wished she had known what it was at the time. Not that she could have stopped the events from unfolding as they had, of course. If she had refused to retrieve it, Ayem would have just found someone else.

Why did he need such an artifact in the first place? Maybe his necromantic interests had gotten him kicked out of the Clockwork Apostles and out of the Clockwork City altogether, and he sought revenge? And if the Band needed divine energy as a source of power, maybe he was somehow stealing Vivec’s for that purpose? Given his track record, it didn’t seem implausible.

Ildari’s stomach was in knots by the time she dragged herself out of bed in the morning. She made a point of eating extra vegetables for breakfast in order to make up for her lost energy, and headed out to the Velothi tower.

Inside, there were geared devices scattered around the lab, some Dwemeri and others of modern clockwork design—all expected of a clockwork mage. At one workbench was a short mer in Telvanni robes, muttering to himself as he worked. He complained when Ildari interrupted him to announce herself, but stopped mid-sentence.

“You. You have the smell of divine energy on you. Explain yourself.”

Ildari faltered. What sort of “smell” did the Tribunal carry? “I, uh…I was sent by Lord Vivec’s Archcanon.”

“Sent? How intriguing. But no, that does not explain it.” He looked her over carefully. “Do you have…No, that can’t be. One thing can’t exist in two places at once. Can it? No, no, of course not. Not by present scientific standards, anyway. Unless you were from the future. That would explain it. But no, of course not. Time travel isn’t possible yet, and even if it were ever to become possible, the ripples caused by such a meeting could cause the aurbis to implode. No responsible traveler would do that.”

Iya watched quietly as he rambled and nervously twisted a ring on his hand. She did have her version of the Mazed Band with her, and while it was hidden away in her bag, it seemed its creator could sense it. Luckily, he seemed too preoccupied with the theoretics of it to actually pursue the issue.

He waved his hands as if to dismiss the whole monologue. “You were saying?”

“Do you know anything about divine energy?” she asked.

“Divine energy? I’ll have you know I participated in Lord Sotha Sil’s Nine Analyses of the Exalted Enigmas.”

“Can you tell me anything about the transfer of divine energy?”

“Hmm. Sotha Sil had a tool that he used to drain away minute bits of energy to store and study. He could extract it and return it as he saw fit. I still have notes on the subject…they’re around here somewhere…” He dug through piles of gears mixed with scattered papers until he miraculously found the notes he was looking for and handed them to Ildari. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I was on the brink of understanding the correlation between color and time.”

Ildari thanked him and left the tower more confused than when she arrived. She had been prepared to hate Barilzar, but she had to admit she found him rather likable. She couldn’t imagine what changed between now and her time, but she could only assume he hadn’t made his ring with malicious intent. Carelessness, maybe, but he seemed to respect Seht a great deal. He did not seem like the type to intentionally cause him harm.

A projection of Tarvus appeared and instructed her to return to Vivec City immediately. Her thoughts about Barilzar were momentarily displaced by worry for Vivec as she hurried to recall back to the city.


	17. In caverns dark, Azura's eye sees

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari makes a trip to the Cavern of the Incarnate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if it's the common convention or not, but I'm using "false incarnate" to describe someone who thought there were the Nerevarine but wasn't Nerevar at all, and "failed incarnate" for someone who was Nerevar but failed to fulfill the prophecies in that life.

It pained Ildari to learn that Vivec’s condition had worsened enough that the people were starting to notice. Appearances were so important to Vehk’s sense of self—ze would not let hir public face slip unless ze were struggling immensely. As soon as she was done talking to the Archcanon, she rushed up to the palace to check in with her friend.

She was shocked to find hir sitting. Even after losing hir connection to the Heart of Lorkhan, ze still preferred to levitate. To be sitting, especially in the middle of the palace in front of Canon Llevule, she could only imagine that ze must be experiencing incredible exhaustion. Once again, she found that she wanted to run up and hug hir, offer support, _something_ more personal than just trekking around Vvardenfell gathering clues, but she couldn’t. She could only play the role of the semi-anonymous adventurer who just happened to be willing to help. Limiting her expression to one of mild, impersonal concern, Ildari knelt at Vivec’s feet in a brief show of respect and then stood to explain her findings.

The Archcanon arrived as she was finishing her explanation and corroborated her report. They sent her back to Ald’ruhn to learn more about the staff. Once more, she wished she could stay with Vehk, but she bowed and took her leave, as was required of her.

As soon as she arrived in Ald’ruhn, Seryn told Ildari that Dovrosi, the Wise Woman of the Urshilaku, had gone to the Cavern of the Incarnate to meditate on Chodala’s claim. She asked Ildari to meet up with Wise Woman to help.

_No riddles about pearls and teeth this time?_ Ildari thought dryly. _That’s practically unfair._

She did have some anxiety about returning to such a holy and fateful place. She was always anxious about being in the presence of Azura, and this was no ordinary shrine. It was a shrine of prophecy, _her_ prophecy, and the tomb of many who had failed where she ultimately succeeded. It was the place where she received her first undeniable vision from Azura, and where she had put on her ring and survived. Except none of that had happened yet. Right now, she was just a supporter, in the wrong time, setting up a false claimant to join the rest of the ancestors.

She met the Wise Woman at the entrance to the Cavern at dusk. Dovrosi spoke with Azura and, seemingly at Azura’s request, reluctantly asked Ildari to speak with the ancestors and learn of their stories while she returned to Ald’ruhn. There were fewer incarnates this time, which made enough sense. Even though she had already been through sixteen of her eighteen lives by this point in history, there would surely be a boom in false incarnates once the Tribunal’s power started to wane. Fewer still had advice to offer. She was not expecting one of them to be Aduri.

But then she remembered. Yes, that time long ago when Azura had pulled her to the mortal world and bid her speak to the curious red-haired mer who seemed a little out of place. It was no great wonder that she had forgotten until now; memories from between lives were all very fuzzy. She could barely even pull up an image of Moonshadow. The times that she had been pulled to the mortal world as an ancestor spirit were not something her semi-mortal mind was supposed to be able to handle.

So, to help her focus, she tried to keep the fuzzy memories out of her mind as she spoke to the incarnate. Still, it was strange looking at herself—even if it was an old instance of herself—in spirit form.

Aduri reminded her of the path of war that had led to her downfall. It was not her finest moment, she had to agree. She had let her desire to protect people turn into bloodlust, and she wouldn’t believe it until it was too late. The gulakhan had ultimately challenged her to a duel and won. It was for the best.

“Take my scroll and help the Wise Woman understand the futility of a senseless war,” Aduri told her.

The other two spirits were false incarnates, unfamiliar to her. Incarnate Ranso had based his claim on his strength. It was no wonder he had failed. Strength was useful, of course, but it alone was not enough to lead a people. She thanked the spirit for his advice and promised to use his scroll to help the Wise Woman find the truth.

The other, Incarnate Danaat, had failed due to his refusal to listen to counsel. _That_ made her angry. The path of the Nerevarine was a complex one. No individual could walk it alone. Besides, when had Nerevar ever refused counsel? How could someone truly believe themselves to be Nerevar reborn if they could not even understand the importance of seeking the advice of trusted allies? Iya could feel Nerevar rising up within her ready to give the false incarnate a good lecture, but she pushed back against her instincts and held her tongue. It would do no good at this point, anyway. She took the scroll and dismissed the spirit.

Azura’s voice echoed through the Cavern. “MORTAL, LET US SPEAK.”

As Ildari made her way back to the statue of Azura, she reached into her pocket and slipped the ring Moon-and-Star onto her finger, both out of respect and as a source of comfort, and began spinning it nervously. She knelt at the foot of the statue, awaiting the Prince’s wisdom.

Azura now spoke directly into Ildari’s mind. “You must convince the tribes that Chodala is not the Nerevarine.”

“I have spoken with the false and failed incarnates, as Wise Woman Dovrosi asked,” Iya said. “I can use their scrolls to present their wisdom to the Ashlanders’ council.”

“Dovrosi’s wisdom outshines most other mortals,” Azura said. “She recognizes the futility of Chodala’s claim. If she rebuffs him, however, the tribes will turn on each other and blood will flow.”

“Are we correct in believing that the staff is the source of Chodala’s power, that he is stealing divine energy from Vivec?”

“Your instincts serve you well. Chodala’s path took a dark turn. However, my sight clouds when I look too closely. Sotha Sil built the blessed staff, but he did not create it with this vile purpose in mind. You must act on my behalf—and Vivec’s.”

_Too bad I can’t just show them my ring,_ Iya wanted to say, but she held her tongue. Azura may not realize that it was a joke. It did, however, make a more serious thought occur to her.

“My Prince, if you will indulge my curiosity, why did Chodala not come here himself for this trial?” she asked. “Would the ring Moon-and-Star not put a swift end to his claim?”

“Chodala is a prideful coward. He is afraid to die, and so he tells himself that he is stronger than prophecy and does not need to be bound by the details,” Azura said. “It is, as you know, just one of the factors that will lead to his downfall. You are another.”

Ildari sat quietly for a moment, meditating on the weight of this whole situation.

“It is very strange to be here again,” she said finally, quietly. In a slightly stronger voice, she continued, “It was stranger still to speak with Aduri. But your divine wisdom has reminded me what my past experiences can bring to the present discussion.”

“You cannot fully understand my intentions, mortal,” Azura replied. “You are correct in that she may serve as a reminder to you, but she is a reminder not only of your failures, but also of how far you have come.”

Ildari felt her face heat up. That was practically praise, coming from Azura. “Thank you, my Prince,” she stammered.

“There may well be other reasons yet unknown to you.” A cryptic half-prophecy to bring them back to their respective comfort zones.

Ildari meditated on that for a few moments more, but she knew that time was short. She would have to get back to Skar before Dovrosi made her final decision.

“Ildari,” the Prince interrupted her as she stood up to leave.

She stumbled back to her knees. “Yes, my Prince?”

“Take off your ring before you return to Skar.”

“Ah.” Ildari smiled. She had, in truth, almost forgotten. She took the ring off and stashed it back in her protected pocket. “Thank you, my Prince.”


	18. On a certain day to uncertain parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari's adventures take her to Ald Velothi, where she meets some other Vestiges who start asking questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of my Vestiges live in a sort of meta-timeline with individual branches; it's fine.

Ildari once again found herself heading for Odirniran to speak with Barilzar. This time, she felt less dread, and more cautious curiosity toward the eccentric clockwork mage. Upon arriving, she was somewhat surprised to find that he was not in his workshop. She then realized that it should not be that strange at all—after all, even the most eccentric mages need to sleep sometimes. She was just about to leave for Molag Mar and come back later when she heard some shouting through the far door.

“Is someone up there? I could use some help down here!”

She hurried through the door and down to the basement level, where she was met by hostile Daedra.

“Hurry, please! I have a natural aversion to Daedra!” Barilzar called from the next room.

She fought the creatures and found Barilzar working on a broken Dwemer spider on the floor of his quarters.

“So hard to concentrate and maintain schedules when interruptions constantly occur. Don’t they know the Great Gear never pauses in its rotations?” he muttered, seemingly to himself. “So that was you up there? I appreciate the assistance.”

“I assume those weren’t your guardians?” she asked. Mages in Velothi towers had a tendency to conjure all sorts of entities for protection, but it seemed that the ones she just fought were unwanted by the tower’s resident.

“What? No, no! I much prefer to protect myself with magical traps and wards. Daedra are far too unpredictable.”

“They were attacking you, then?”

“I suppose so. Studying the fabric of reality does tend to attract unwanted attention, but these creatures appeared just before you entered my tower. I wonder, why have you returned?”

“I located Seht’s tool. It’s in the possession of a false incarnate. It’s been altered to steal Vivec’s divine energy.”

“Ingenious! Evil, yes, but also quite brilliant,” Barilzar said thoughtfully. He noticed the expectant look on Ildari’s face and continued. “Hmm. A tonal inverter should counter it. Uses sound waves to temporarily disrupt the flow of energy.”

“Do you have one that I could use?”

“No, of course not. I just invented it! I need proper components to build such a device.”

He directed her to some of his old hirelings in Molag Mar who would be able to point her toward the components he needed. She suppressed a sigh at the idea of scouring the island for obscure Dwemer bits while her friend was dying, but it did seem to be her only hope. After making sure Barilzar felt safe enough without her, she left through the trap door and went to Molag Mar.

* * *

Ildari traveled along eastern and then northern Vvardenfell in search of the components for Barilzar. When she finished with the last stop, Arkngthunch-Sturdumz, she was more than ready for a rest. She looked at her map to find the best place to stay, and realized that she was near a house in Ald Velothi that Seht had told her she would have access to. Apparently, it was occupied by a Dunmer couple who were also Vestiges. The idea of there being multiple “Prisoners” was something that she was still getting used to, but Seht assured her that they knew about her and that she would be most welcome. She decided that it was better than trekking all the way to Gnisis to stay at an inn.

She found the house just west of Ashalmawia. It was a Redoran-style bughouse—very cute, she thought. She approached the door and wondered for a second what she was supposed to do. Even if it was technically “her” house just as much as anyone else’s, she thought it would be best to knock, just to be safe. While she waited for an answer, she reached into her pocket and slipped on Moon-and-Star in the hopes that it would help her figure out how to explain herself.

A mer with dark pink hair wearing an apron answered the door.

“Uh, hi,” Ildari said. “I’ve heard that this is…well, I’m a Vestige, and—”

The woman’s face lit up. “Are you Ildari?”

“I am,” she replied with some surprise at the quick recognition.

“Oh, how wonderful! Come in, come in! I’m Milia.” She ushered Ildari inside and danced across the main room to the kitchen area, where another mer was cooking. “This is my girlfriend, Talvini. Tal, this is Ildari.”

Talvini looked up and gave Ildari a friendly smile and half-bow.

“Tal and I were just making dinner. Are you hungry?”

Her stomach rumbled as if in response. “Actually, if you have the food to spare…”

“Of course!” Milia said. “Make yourself comfortable. There’s a bedroom right over there that you can use, if you’ll be staying here.”

“Thank you, sera,” Ildari said. She bowed to the two mer and went into the bedroom to clean up.

* * *

“So, tell us about yourself, Ildari,” Milia said over saltrice and bittergreen.

A dangerous question. “What would you like to know?”

“Well, let’s see. What do you do when you’re not adventuring, or are you a full-time adventurer?”

“Adventuring takes up most of my time these days, but I do some research here and there.”

Tal looked interested. “What sort of research?”

_Be careful,_ she told herself. “Mostly enchanting. I’ve been staying in the Clockwork City lately, so I’ve also been studying some mechanical magic.”

“Oh, really?” Tal said. “I’d love to hear about your work sometime. I’m a mage and researcher as well.”

“How interesting! I’d love to hear about your research as well.” She turned to Milia. “I noticed your staff—are you also a mage?”

“I am, but not like you two. I actually started out as a full-time adventurer, even before this whole Vestige business, but now I’m a Buoyant Armiger.” She smiled and added, “Which is kind of like being a professional adventurer.”

“Ah, Vivec’s finest!”

“I try,” Milia said. She paused for a moment, looking closely at Ildari, and then said, “You know, you look very familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?”

Ildari considered it. She didn’t think she had met Milia before today. “Maybe we’ve seen each other around Vivec City?”

“No, that’s not it…” She waved a hand. “It’ll come to me. So, do you belong to a Great House?”

A complicated question. “My parents belonged to House Telvanni, but I grew up in Cyrodiil, so I haven’t formally enrolled in the House.” _And I won’t until 3E427._

“Ah, Tal is from Telvanni too!” Milia looked between the two of them. “Actually, you look a little bit like Tal. Maybe you’re related?”

“Who are your ancestors?” Tal asked.

“Truthfully, I don’t know much about my ancestors—even my parents. I suppose we could be related, but it would be hard to determine.” _If we are, there’s more distance than you expect._

Tal nodded thoughtfully, and then her eyes landed on Ildari’s hand and narrowed. “What a pretty ring.”

“Oh, thank you!” _Shit._ “It’s a, uh, family heirloom.”

“I see…Is it Dwemeri?”

“Supposedly,” Ildari said with a casual shrug, though her heart raced. “Seems a little implausible to me, but that’s what they say.”

They continued their small talk for the rest of the dinner. Ildari thanked them for the meal and helped clean up, but quickly slipped out to her bedroom afterward on the pretense of exhaustion. She hoped to limit the opportunities to reveal even more about herself.

The following morning, she awoke to a nudge at her mind. She recognized the signature as a projection from Seht, but she had never received this type of projection before. It felt like a request, and that she would have to somehow accept it. She reached her magicka out to the projection and tried to bring it into her mind.

“Seht?”

“Iya,” came Seht’s calm voice in her head. “No need to speak out loud. I can hear your thoughts, as long as you think them clearly.”

_Comforting. What’s going on?_

“Your new friends are suspicious. They will come to you with questions. Be honest, and tell them you mean no harm, though they will require more reassurance.”

_What sort of reassurance?_

“They will ultimately decide to take you to Ayem. Just cooperate. She will, of course, be expecting you, and so you have nothing to worry about.”

_Do they know I’m a little busy trying to save Vehk?_

“Yes, but I’m sure you can understand why the circumstances might make that complicated in itself.”

She sighed.

“You are worried.”

_Of course I’m worried._

“Ayem will handle it.”

_I’m worried I won’t make it to Ayem. Milia’s a Buoyant Armiger. In my experience, they like to deal with incarnates by yelling, ‘Now you die!’ and coming at me with a sword._

“You can trust Milia. And Talvini. But we will also track you and intervene at the first sign of trouble, should it arise.”

She sighed again.

“Does this reassure you?”

_I suppose it’s the best I can ask for._

“Everything will be fine, Iya.”

_Promise you’ll keep an eye on me._

“I promise.”

She felt the projection dissipate.

She got dressed and went out to the main room to get breakfast, where Talvini and Milia were already dressed and sitting at the table. She smiled nervously.

“Morning,” Tal said with a pleasant, if guarded, voice. “There’s tea, if you want some.”

“Ah, thanks,” Ildari said. She made toast with comberry jam, poured herself some tea, and joined them at the table. They all sat in an uncomfortable silence while Ildari ate her breakfast.

“Doing anything exciting today?” Ildari asked after a while.

“Actually,” Milia said cautiously, “we were going to see if you’d come with us to Mournhold.”

“Mournhold?” she asked. “I don’t know. I need to get to Molag Mar as soon as possible. What’s going on in Mournhold?”

Milia shifted in her seat. “Have you ever heard of the Nerevarine prophecies?”

Ildari ate the last bite of toast and took a sip of tea. “I have. Why do you ask?”

“We think you might have the appearance of someone who could meet the prophecies.”

Ildari chuckled in spite of herself. “Would it surprise you to learn that you’re not the first to say that?”

Indeed, they both looked surprised.

“So you agree?” Milia said. “You think you could be…”

“More than ‘think.’ You saw the ring Moon-and-Star. There’s no need to dance around it,” Ildari said. “Now, I could give you my word that I mean the Tribunal no harm, but I doubt you’d accept it.”

Milia shook her head. “Sorry, but if you think you’re an incarnate, then the Tribunal really should be made aware. That’s why we’d like you to come with us to Mournhold.”

“Mournhold it is, then,” Ildari said. “I do hope we can do without shackles, though? I have some bad memories of being brought before the Tribunal in Mournhold in shackles.”

“Oh, of course. You’re being very cooperative. And no offense, but”—she looked Ildari over with a faint smile—“I think I could take you if you tried anything.”

* * *

The recall hubs made the trip to Mournhold a quick one. Despite the lack of restraints, Milia’s commanding presence in her Buoyant Armiger uniform told onlookers that they were on a mission and not to be interrupted. When they reached the temple, Milia saluted the Ordinator at the door and received one in return.

“Armiger. Citizens. The Sacred Lady awaits you.”

“Thank you, sera,” Milia said.

“We’re watching you,” the Ordinator growled.

Ildari thought he was talking to her, until she heard Milia make a friendly scoff.

“What, afraid I’ll burst into song and threaten your sacred monotony? I’ll be good; don’t worry.” She winked and skipped past him, dragging the other two along with her.

“Armigers and Ordinators are always doing that,” Tal whispered to Ildari.

Milia quickly put her serious face back on when they entered the chamber. She and Talvini stood to either side of Ildari, each with a hand gently on her arm, guiding her up to where Almalexia floated, waiting for them. They knelt before her, urging Ildari down with them. When they rose, Milia began to speak.

“Muthsera, we come before you today—”

“I know why you have come,” Almalexia said with an even smile. “The four of us should speak in private.” She waved to her Hands, who all left the room, closing the doors behind them.

As soon as they were alone, Ayem broke into a raucous giggle. It lasted several seconds while Talvini and Milia watched in confusion, and Iya struggled to keep a straight face.

“Iya, dear,” she said at last, catching her breath. “Did you _really_ get arrested by your grandmothers?”

Iya’s eyes widened slightly, and Talvini and Milia exchanged a very confused look. But Almalexia saw neither of these things, as she now had both hands in front of her face, shoulders shaking with laughter.

She took another breath. “I mean, disappointing your ancestors is one thing, but getting _arrested_?”

Ildari bit her lip to keep from joining in with Ayem’s laughter. “Perhaps you could fill our friends in?”

“Of course.” Almalexia’s laughter subsided, and she turned to Talvini and Milia. “Listen well, my children, and speak not a word outside the present company. Where to begin…This is Ildari. She is indeed the Nerevarine, but she poses no threat to us now. She was born in the third era, fulfilled the prophecies in her time, and was later sent back to our time in order to deal with the present threats to Nirn.”

“Would you care to elaborate on the ‘grandmothers’ part?” Iya asked.

“What, is it not obvious? Come now, it doesn’t take a god to see the resemblance.” She looked at their blank expressions. “But, if you prefer divine wisdom, you can have it: Talvini and Milia, you are Ildari’s maternal grandmothers.”

“Both of us?” Talvini asked with cautious confusion. “By blood?”

“Yes,” Ayem said simply.

“If you’ll forgive me, muthsera, how can that be?”

Ayem smiled. “I am confident that you will figure it out in the next several centuries.”

* * *

“Well, that was enlightening,” Ildari said when they were back outside the temple. “I hope that cleared up your questions.”

“The ones we entered with, maybe,” Milia said. “Did you know we were your ancestors?”

Ildari shook her head. “‘Uncertain parents’ and all that.”

Milia stared absently into space. “Our granddaughter is the fetching _Nerevarine_…Vivec’s going to kill me.” Her gaze snapped back to center. “_Is_ Vivec going to kill me?”

“To do so would disrupt the timeline that already exists; I don’t think any of them would try that,” Ildari said. “Besides, by the time I fulfilled the prophecies, it was more about addressing other threats to Morrowind. I was ultimately allied with the Tribunal, if you’ll believe that.”

“I’d believe just about anything right now,” Tal said.

The sun over Mournhold was reaching its peak, and Ildari was reminded of her duties to Vvardenfell and Vivec.

“Well, my _gahaama_grandmothers—” she began.

“Let’s not do that,” Tal said with a short laugh.

“I’m only seventy-four!” Milia added. “That said, you can bet we’ll pull the ancestor card on you whenever it suits us.”

Ildari laughed. “Fair enough. Does that mean we can see each other again sometime? I know I joke, but it is nice to finally know my ancestors.”

“Of course!” Milia said. “The house at Ald Velothi is always open to you. We would love to see you again.”

Milia opened her arms for a hug, which Iya accepted with enthusiasm. She hugged Tal next.

“Well, I should continue on to Molag Mar,” Ildari said. “See you soon.”


	19. To my shame, I craved glory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari objects to the Archcanon’s treatment of Seryn. Ildari and Seryn have to confront Chodala.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kind of a short questy chapter.

With the tonal inverter assembled, Ildari returned to the temple in Vivec City. When she reached the Archcanon’s office, she was surprised to find that Archcanon Tarvus and two Armigers were giving Seryn trouble.

“Is there a problem?”

“Pay no attention to this Ashlander,” the Archcanon said. “I was just about to have her thrown out of the city—or possibly tossed to the slaughterfish.”

Ildari narrowed her eyes. “On what grounds?”

“She’s been blathering on about Lord Vivec’s condition and how she can help, but I’m certain it’s a trick of some sort.”

“Conoon Seryn is our friend, Archcanon. She has been helping me since we met in Ald’ruhn.”

“I know who she is! I still don’t trust her and I refuse to let her anywhere near Lord Vivec. Who knows what an Ashlander would do while the Warrior-Poet is in such a fragile state?”

Ildari took a step forward, involuntarily clenching her fists and letting Nerevar’s voice and fiery impulsivity shine through. “Is this how you treat all your allies? By threatening to throw them to the slaughterfish? You would refuse a great boon over ideological differences?” She stopped and took a breath, reminding herself of her current role, but not before making a mental note to criticize Vehk for hir people’s treatment of Ashlanders once ze was feeling better. In a cool voice, she continued. “I need Seryn’s help. Release her, or explain to Vivec why hir hero cannot proceed.”

The Archcanon looked like he wanted to fight back, but settled for a scoff. “Very well. Take her and defeat Chodala. Then bring me his staff, Sunna’rah, so we can restore Vivec.”

She bowed, eyes locked on Tarvus with an icy glare, and left with Seryn.

Seryn had been disarmed by the Buoyant Armigers and needed to get new equipment, and so they agreed to meet at Kaushtarari, a Daedric ruin that Chodala and his Red Exiles had apparently run off to. The shrine was to Malacath, which surprised Ildari. Malacath was bound by the Coldharbour Compact, and there had been no clues pointing to his involvement during her investigations prior to arriving in Vvardenfell. She wondered whether this was a false clue, or perhaps Chodala himself was being misled.

When they arrived, they found that the shrine was crawling with skaafin.

“These creatures…they don’t belong to Malacath. Another Prince’s power is at work here,” Seryn noted.

They continued until they reached Chodala at the main shrine, where he was cursing the God of Curses.

“Chodala, brother, stop this madness!” Seryn shouted.

Chodala turned around to face them, casting some sort of protective shield with Sunna’rah. “You bring this Outlander to kill me, sister? You can’t harm me! I have a powerful patron on my side!”

He summoned a wave of skaafin in an attempt to hold them off. Unlucky for him, in doing this he unknowingly gave Seryn the time to power up the tonal inverter. Once Ildari had fought off the skaafin, Seryn alerted her that the device was ready. She held out the fork and directed the wave at Chodala, and the staff’s power was interrupted.

“My protective shield!” he shouted. “What have you done? I’ll destroy all of you for this!”

He leapt down from the platform, axe in hand, and charged at Ildari. She drew her staff and stepped to the side, drawing his attention away from Seryn, while staying at range to fight him with magic. A few bursts of fire and a bolt of lightning brought the fight to a decisive end.

“Azura, we’ve defeated the false Nerevarine, just as you commanded,” Seryn said. She slowly walked toward her brother’s body.

Ildari put her staff away and turned to her.

“That was…harder than expected,” Seryn said.

“I’m sorry you had to see that, Seryn,” Ildari said. “And I’m sorry it had to come to that.”

“It was either Chodala or the lives of hundreds of Dunmer, all because he convinced himself he was the Nerevarine. Or someone convinced him. Either way, my brother is dead and the Cavern of the Incarnate has another resident.” She took a breath. “I need to see to his remains.”

“Would you like me to stay with you?”

“No. Vvardenfell needs you. Take Sunna’rah and return to Vivec City. I will meet you there, but first, I will do my own duty.”

Ildari’s eyes landed on Chodala’s axe, the very same one that he gave her in the Cavern of the Incarnate during her third trial.

_I know you will, Seryn,_ she thought. _Azura keep you._


	20. Curse-of-Despair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari and friends save Vivec.

The sky was even ashier than normal when Ildari arrived in Vivec City. Between that and the menacing rumbling of Red Mountain, she almost felt like she was inside the Ghostfence during the Blight.

She pushed down her sense of dread as she climbed the steps to the Palace. When she reached the top, she was surprised to find the main room empty. Cautiously, she went through one of the side doors into Vivec’s chambers. She had been through those doors plenty of times when she came from, but now it could be seen as a major breach of boundaries. Still, she had to do something.

Once inside, she saw Vivec lying on the bed, and the Archcanon standing at hir side.

“Oh, this is terrible!” Archcanon Tarvus said as he noticed her enter. “Lord Vivec collapsed! Tell me, Outlander, were you able to defeat Chodala? Have you brought me his staff? I’m afraid Lord Vivec may not last much longer.”

“Yes, I’ve brought sunna’rah,” Ildari said, rushing over to where they were.

“And just in time! We can use the staff to save Vivec. Just plant it in the floor and the power will return to hir.”

Ildari did as instructed, planting the sunna’rah in a notch by the foot of Vivec’s bed. Light began to flow from it into Vivec. Ildari nearly allowed herself to feel relieved, until Vivec started thrashing on the bed.

“Perfect! It’s working just as I expected!” the Archcanon shouted over the _whoosh_ of magic.

Ildari drew her own staff and turned to face him, but was interrupted by Seryn’s return.

“What are you doing? It’s killing hir!” Seryn shouted.

“What did you expect?” Tarvus said. “That’s the point of all this, after all.”

Before Ildari could ask, Seryn powered up the tonal inverter. Ildari activated it as soon as it was ready, interrupting the beam from sunna’rah and knocking herself and Seryn to the ground. Chains of magic came up from the floor and held them in place as the Archcanon morphed into an unusually tall skaafin.

“You’re too late! I see it now, the Clockwork City!” the skaafin said, projecting an image of the city. “Look what Barbas has found for you, Master!”

_Barbas, Clavicus Vile’s dog,_ Ildari realized just before he grabbed the staff and vanished, letting their magical restraints vanish with him.

Once back on her feet, she saw that Vivec was now floating a few feet above hir body. Her heart sank. Was ze dead? Was that even possible? She ran over to hir, but remembered herself at the last second and went to her knees before addressing hir.

“Barbas killed the Archcanon…took his place. I should have known,” Vivec said slowly. “Chodala…Sotha Sil’s device…impersonating Tarvus…it was all part of some elaborate plan.”

“And despite the gravity of it, I assume attempting to kill you and destroy Vvardenfell was just a step along the way? He seemed interested in the Clockwork City.”

“Yes. They needed Tribunal energy to locate the Clockwork City. I was the easiest target. If Barbas enters Sotha Sil’s city…disaster will follow,” ze said. “I appreciate your help, but I must conserve what remains of my energy.”

She bowed and stepped back, considering what they had learned. So, now it seemed that two of her god-friends were in danger. She wondered if Seht would hear a “prayer” of warning, but she suspected the danger was already underway, and he was likely well aware of it. Her contemplation was interrupted as Canon Llevule entered the room.

“By the Three, Lord Vivec looks terrible!” Llevule said.

Ildari wondered if that was a contender for the understatement of the era as she crossed the room to meet him. She filled him in on what had happened with the Archcanon, and he expressed fear that Baar Dau could fall if Vivec’s divine energy remained this depleted. He suggested that she retrieve another blessing stone to give Vivec some of hir energy back.

Even as she made her way toward the Palace’s exit, she could hear the rumbling of imminent doom and the screams to go with it. When she opened the door, she saw Baar Dau plummeting toward the city. The Buoyant Armigers guarding the door drew their swords, perhaps in some vain hope that they could fight the moonlet should it threaten the city. For an instant, she wondered if she had failed in the mission Azura had given her, if she and everyone in the city—maybe everyone in Morrowind—was about to die, but the rock stopped short of hitting the ground, instead hovering at the altitude that she knew it to be from her home time. She mentally crossed out the hypothesis that it was always slowly descending and rushed down the stairs to make sure it did not get the chance to make another major descent.

She managed to return with the blessing stone without much further disaster, dodging falling fireballs as she went. When she arrived back in Vivec’s chambers, she placed the stone in the notch on the floor and waited for Llevule to activate it. This time, there was no pained thrashing as the energy flowed back into Vivec.

Now that Vivec was at least partially restored, they were able to discuss the situation at hand. Vivec suspected that Barbas had replaced Tarvus weeks ago, all to get to the Clockwork City. Ildari could not understand why Barbas specifically wanted access to Seht’s domain, and wondered if Vivec had any ideas, but decided against asking right now.

“Perhaps we require a Daedra…to fight a Daedra,” Vivec said. “Azura’s champion, Seryn…is in the Archcanon’s office. Seek guidance from her patron. But hurry. My time grows short.”

Ildari descended to the Archcanon’s office and was greeted by Azura’s glowing light.

“So Vivec deigns to ask for help?” Azura said through Seryn. “I foresaw such an event, but scarcely believed it.”

Ildari suppressed an eyeroll.

“The mysteries reveal that Barbas seeks to enter the Clockwork City. So far, Sotha Sil’s wards have impeded him, but the hound has sunna’rah. You must beat him to the prize—the reservoir that holds Vivec’s stolen energy.”

“I understand, my Prince,” Ildari said. “Do you know where the reservoir is? I have spent some time in the Clockwork City, of course, but I do not know enough about Sotha Sil’s many workshops to locate such a thing in time.”

“Such knowledge has been hidden even from me, mortal. But I know someone who can help you. Stand back and I shall summon your friend, the mage of cogs and gears.”

A portal appeared, and Ildari half expected Varuni to step out, but instead met a very confused Barilzar.

“Interesting. Summoned by a Daedric Prince and her mortal mouthpiece,” he said. “I was right in the middle of a crucial experiment, but I suppose I can spare a few clicks of the cogs for Azura and my erstwhile assistant. So, did you break the tonal inverter?”

Ildari laughed despite herself. What went on in that mage’s head that would lead him to such a conclusion?

“No, Barilzar, your tonal inverter worked perfectly,” Ildari said. “Azura summoned you for help accessing the Clockwork City and Seht’s workshops.”

“Mm. No, not going to happen,” he said. “No offense to the Lady of Twilight, but Sotha Sil was quite adamant about keeping the place hidden and warded against the Daedra. Oh, wait. Pistons fall into place. This concerns sunna’rah and Lord Vivec, I presume?”

“Yes, we need to reach the reservoir where Seht’s device stores divine energy before Barbas gets there.”

She could almost see the gears clicking into place through Barilzar’s expression.

“In that case, I can get us to the entrance to the Clockwork City through Bamz-Amschend, under Mournhold.”

The irony of being guided through the Clockwork City by none other than Barilzar, the creator of the fateful Mazed Band that had gotten her there the first time, was not lost on Ildari as she stepped through his portal.

Barbas had left some skaafin in their way, but Ildari had no trouble dealing with them. As they made their way to the platform where the factotums were patrolling, she expected to walk right through them like last time, but was rudely reminded when they drew their weapons that she was not the one they had stepped aside for when she came through here during her arrival to this time period.

“Sorry, Seht,” she whispered as she fought off the militant protectors of the entrance to the Clockwork City. She was sure he would understand, but made a mental note to remind him that he might want to set up some new protectors.

Barilzar caught up to her after hanging back, having claimed to be conscientious of the repercussions should a factotum see a former Clockwork Apostle as hostile. He activated the revolving celestiodrome and directed them to Seht’s workshops. Though she had felt it before, the traveling sensation was still jarring, and wholly different from the sensation of recalling. She stumbled as they landed, and took a moment to re-orient herself as she looked around at their surroundings.

This was definitely Seht’s workshop district. She had been to a couple of his workshops before—he had so many—but she didn’t know the whole area very well. Certainly not like Seht’s old apprentice did. She let him lead the way—or rather, direct the way while he hung back and let her fight—across the many bridges and platforms. When they finally arrived outside the Divinity Atelier, where Sotha Sil conducted his Nine Analyses of the Exalted Enigma, Barilzar instructed her to go inside while he shut off what defenses he could from the outside.

There were still some mechanical defenses to deal with, but she eventually reached the platform where the reservoir was located, and where Barbas was ready to fight.

“Like my new armor?” he asked. “I wanted to wear something special when I kill you.”

The armor was indeed very nice. It looked to be made of ebony (or ebony-like creatia) in a common Daedric style, with a unique helm that looked like the head of a dog. Unfortunately, she it would likely end up getting destroyed during the fight, as she had no intention of dying. Sure, she expected the fight to be difficult, as Barbas was technically an aspect of a Daedric Prince, by some accounts. But she had fought Daedric Princes and other gods before and lived. She had the usual amount of apprehension, but she was more concerned about getting the divine energy back before the rest of Clavicus Vile could reach the city.

The fight went about as expected. Barbas occasionally jumped to one of the workstations around the room to create the pieces of Vile’s portal, each time coming back to the fight with a little more energy. She tried to kill him before he could finish getting the portal open, but the more damage she dealt, the faster he jumped around. It was infuriating, but she kept her head long enough to finally defeat him. She picked up sunna’rah and retrieved Vivec’s divine energy as Barilzar opened a portal for her to leave.

Just like the last time she had relied on Barilzar for transportation out of the Clockwork City, she was intercepted by a Daedric Prince. This time, however, it was not Azura, but Clavicus Vile.

Vile seemed most upset that Ildari had fought Barbas, though he did admit some annoyance that she had “delayed” his plans.

“You’ll stay here until you’re no longer a threat,” he said. “How does a few decades sound to you?”

“Actually, I think I’ll find my own way out of here.”

She reached for her marks. As expected, they were inaccessible—Vile must have been suppressing classic teleportation magic. It had been worth a shot, anyway. Her next thought was to the Mazed Band. Technically, she had her own copy with her, but it seemed like a bad idea. She might have been able to keep it mostly out of Barilzar’s detection so far, but she didn’t want to have to explain how she’d escaped if he started asking questions. And that was if he didn’t recnogize the signature, which he most likely would. No, the Mazed Band was out of the question.

She did not have many options, in truth, and she was not ready to put the conditional immortality part of the Nerevarine prophecies to the test. Luckily, she had to wait only a few more seconds before a projection of Barilzar appeared.

“I lost you somewhere between the Clockwork City and Vivec, but it was simple enough to trace your energy signature to this Daedric shrine,” Barilzar said. “Unfortunately, some power is interfering with my efforts to open a portal for you.”

“That’s Clavicus Vile,” Ildari said. _Your Band seems to have a Daedric vulnerability. Might want to look into that._ “He wants to keep me here for a few decades so I don’t get in the way of more of his plans.”

She almost left it at that, but then realized that Barilzar might need some prodding before he understood that she would want help escaping.

“Naturally, that won’t do,” she added. “Maybe you could help me get out sooner? Something closer to the scale of seconds?”

“Hmm. Yes, I think I could assist you,” Barilzar said. “Expend a small amount of Vivec’s energy at the statue. That should provide a small distraction for Vile and strengthen your signal enough for me to pull you out of there.”

“Expend Vivec’s energy?” Ildari asked. “Is that a good idea?”

“Just a tiny burst. It will be fine, I expect. Most likely, anyway. Hopefully, I’ll be able to grab you before anything explodes.”

Ildari sighed and pointed sunna’rah at the statue, and let out a small burst of energy. Within a second or so, she was being pulled through space, and finally landed back in Vivec’s chambers, where Barilzar, Seryn, and Llevule waited, and where Vivec’s spirit still floated above hir body.

“Were you…successful?” Vivec asked. “Can you restore…my energy?”

“I retrieved your energy. How should I go about restoring it?” She looked from Vivec to Barilzar, assuming the latter might have more familiarity with the tool Seht had designed. Barilzar, however, seemed distracted, and did not make any indication that he understood that the question was directed, in part, to him.

“Use the staff…expend its energy upon me.”

“Ve—_Muthsera_,” she said, catching herself just in time, “last time, it almost killed you. Are you certain it will restore you this time? Does it not need some sort of modification first?”

“Nothing is certain, but I have confidence…in you…in what you have done. Use the staff…return my energy. Or not. In a little while…it won’t matter.”

Ildari once again found herself suppressing an eyeroll at a god’s dramatics, but the fleeting sense was quickly replaced with apprehension. Would she not simply be blasting hir with an entire god’s worth of energy? Would ze really be able to properly absorb it? Could ze even control hir body in this state?

Still, she had to try. Like ze had said, if she waited even a few minutes, they would have a much bigger problem on their hands—a problem the size of a small moon falling on Vvardenfell.

She tried to sense the staff’s properties, but it had the complexity that could be expected of one of Seht’s tools. She considered trying to control the flow of energy herself, but as her only previous experience with Lorkhan Juice was using Kagrenac’s tools to unbind the Heart, she decided that that would be unwise. She might even accidentally imbue herself with some of the energy (though that was almost worth it, if only to see the look on Azura’s face). Reminding herself that time was short, she pointed the staff at Vivec’s body and hoped for the best as she released the energy onto hir. As the staff was expended, Vivec’s body rose up and merged with hir floating spirit.

“Remarkable!” Vivec said, hir voice now full again, reverberating with divinity. “You uncovered a Daedric spy in our midst, brought a Living God back from the brink of death, and saved all of Vvardenfell. Well done, my friend!”

Ildari felt as if a weight had been lifted off of her. She wanted to leap at Vivec and hug hir, but she settled for a bow. “I am relieved to see you feeling better, muthsera.”

Of course, there was still more to be done. Vivec sent her to make preparations for a ceremony honoring those who had helped deal with this threat. When she arrived outside the Temple Canton, the party was already assembled.

Canon Llevule was elevated to Archcanon for stepping up when the old Archcanon was rendered unfit. Overseer Shiralas and her wife were honored, and Shiralas was presented with new blessing stones to continue work on the new canton. Barilzar was given a similar reward: stones with a small amount of divine energy for his studies. Then Ildari was called personally, and Vivec named her hir champion—for the first time, from hir perspective.

Once the blessings were distributed, Ildari checked in with Seryn, who was standing awkwardly to the side. She couldn’t imagine what she was going through. Sure, she knew what it was like to be Azura’s champion, and to be killed for being a “False” Incarnate. So maybe she could imagine it a little, but that was all the more reason to check in.

“How are you doing, Seryn?”

“I lost my brother to ambition and became the champion of Azura. From that point of view, I suppose I’m doing as well as can be expected,” Seryn said. “But what about you, Ildari?”

“Me?”

“Your role in this is not quite how it appears from the surface, is it?”

Ildari’s stomach did somersaults. What had she unintentionally revealed? What did Seryn know? What did everyone else know? She forced a smile and a look of casual curiosity.

“I’m not quite sure what you mean.”

Seryn led her a few steps out of earshot of the rest of the party.

“When Azura spoke to you through me, you addressed her as ‘my Prince.’”

_Shit._ “Ah, just some basic respect for the Good Daedra.”

Seryn smiled, but it felt like she could see right into her. “I saw things about you, through Azura. Fleeting sensations, just a flash of understanding here and there, but it was enough.”

Ildari remained silent, waiting for her to say exactly what it was that she saw. Surely Azura would only allow Seryn access to knowledge that she was meant to have, right?

“Chodala…never stood a chance, did he?” she asked. “You’ve been some of them, but you were never him, were you?”

“No,” Ildari said, barely louder than a whisper. “I’m so sorry, Seryn. I wish I could have said something—”

Seryn bit her lip and looked as if she were about to cry. “I want to be upset—I want to be _furious_, but I know you were just doing my Prince’s will. _Our_ Prince’s will.” She sighed. “And I doubt Chodala would have listened, anyway.”

“It would have disrupted the flow of time; it would have risked breaking the dragon further. Still, I’m sorry.”

They were both quiet for a moment.

“I still have his axe, you know,” Ildari broke the silence. “Not with me, of course, but at home. He spoke to me in the Cavern of the Incarnate, and gave me the axe that you buried with him. I didn’t know him at the time, but I’m sure he remembered me. His spirit remains strong, even centuries from now. Maybe I shouldn’t be telling you this,” she added with a small laugh. “I may not have his memories, but I can say with certainty that you were the best sister he could have asked for.”

Seryn surprised Ildari by throwing her arms around her, the chitinous exterior that she had clearly been trying so hard to maintain now crumbling away to make way for tears. Ildari adjusted her unprepared stance to accept the hug, while Seryn’s shoulders shook as she cried.

Ildari did not say anything, but let Seryn have this moment of broken shell in peace.

“I’m sorry,” Seryn said finally as she broke away. “This is supposed to be a celebration, and here I am, mourning.”

“Understandably,” Ildari said.

Seryn made no indication that she heard her. Already, her exterior seemed to be hardening again. “I need to get back to Skar. There’s still so much to do.”

“Right,” Ildari said. She couldn’t imagine the Ashlander felt particularly comfortable here in the city of a usurper god. “Azura watch over you, Seryn.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this marks the end of the Vvardenfell questline! I decided to shove the last handful of quests into one chapter so that we could move onto things like Ildari's reactions to the events and stuff. Ildari is still going to stop by Balmora and meet Veya sometime before Summerset, but that will probably be after CWC. And in the meantime, we are in desperate need of some non-questy chapters.


	21. Catching up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari debriefs with Vivec and Almalexia, and then returns to the Clockwork City for more debriefing.

After Seryn left, Ildari wandered back toward the group. They had mostly dispersed by now, but Vivec was still floating by hir statue. Hir attention locked onto her as she returned.

“My champion!” ze said. “I wonder if you’d join me back in the palace? I think we still have some business to discuss.”

She was immediately curious about what kind of “business” ze meant. Something about Seht and the Clockwork City? Something about the conversation she had just had with Seryn?

“Of course, muthsera.”

They were back in the palace before she could blink. Ildari was surprised to see Almalexia there as well, and from the fleeting look on Vehk’s face, so was ze.

“Ayem, so wonderful of you to join us!” ze said.

“Glad to see you’re feeling better,” Ayem said, floating to hir side and wrapping an arm around hir.

“Thanks to our friend here,” ze said, gesturing toward Iya. “Now, down to business. Ildari, my friend, as my memories of the past several weeks come back into focus, you remain fuzzy. And yet, the entire time you have been here, you have seemed much more enthusiastic about offering support than I would have expected of someone from whom I have never heard so much as a bedtime prayer. There were times when I thought you were about to hug me.” Ze looked thoughtful. “I wonder why that is.”

Ildari glanced to Ayem for support.

Vehk followed her gaze to Ayem. “Is this your mer-shaped void?”

“She is,” Ayem looked to be suppressing a laugh.

“Yes, that fits…” Vehk said contemplatively, looking Iya over. “Now, there is one memory in particular that stands out to me: an experience had by one of my Buoyant Armigers. In Mournhold.” Hir gaze shifted back to Almalexia, who responded with a look that may as well have been confirmation.

It occurred to her that when Ayem had explained Ildari’s identity to Milia and Talvini, she must have known the word would reach Vehk quickly. That would explain why she was here now, ready to perform damage control.

“I see,” Vehk said. Iya wondered if ze and Ayem were exchanging words telepathically. Hir gaze returned to Iya, and ze spent several seconds studying her quietly, intently. Finally, ze lowered hir feet to the floor and approached her directly, and extended a hand.

She took hir hand cautiously, watching hir closely. Her heart was racing. Was it from fear that Vivec might kill her, or excitement that ze might understand who she was, and that she could have her friend back? Probably a mix, she realized.

“Neht?” ze asked softly.

She nodded. “Iya, preferably. But yes.”

“Iya,” ze repeated with a smile. “And you are not here to end us, then?”

She shook her head.

Ze continued studying her for several very long seconds, but eventually released her hand and opened hir arms for a hug. “How I have missed you, my friend.”

Iya flung herself into the hug without the slightest bit of hesitation. It was so, incredibly nice to have hir back, to finally have all of them back.

“We have some catching up to do,” ze said as ze finally stepped back and pulled hir legs back up to hover. “Or, perhaps we do not. If your past takes place largely in the future, then ‘catching up’ would be more like getting ahead. And we can’t have that.”

“Maybe I should let Ayem fill you in. Or Seht. He might know the most, since he can actually hear me. I guess that comes with me being Azura’s problem,” she said. “Speaking of Seht, is he okay? I would have expected him to be here.”

“He was shaken by the incursion, and is working on his city’s defenses,” Almalexia said. “It would be wise to visit him soon. He would benefit from a grounding influence.”

* * *

Sotha Sil was not around to greet Ildari when she returned to the Clockwork City a few days later. That was not especially odd, but given the circumstances, she decided to ask around anyway. She found Luciana first.

“I haven’t seen him since the breach a few days ago,” Luciana said. “That was you who kicked the dog out? That’s good. One less loose end to worry about.”

“Me and Barilzar,” Ildari confirmed.

“Barilzar?” Luciana looked instantly wary. “Don’t tell me he used that band of his.”

“He did.”

Luciana sighed and rubbed her forehead. “I take it back. There’s more cleanup than I realized.”

“You’re not going to—”

“Kill him?” She laughed. “No. Easy at that might make things, Seht would never have it. But I will have to schedule a whole new set of patrols, just in case he tore any holes in the wards and—Seht forbid—let any chaos in.” She pulled out a notebook and made a note before setting it back down on her desk. “Well, if you see Lord Seht, remind him that some of us are mortal and don’t like to go weeks, or years, without seeing him.”

She talked to Varuni next.

“I’ve been working with him on the Nine Analyses of the Exalted Enigma for a while, but he said he’d need a few days to deal with security after the breach,” Varuni said. “I haven’t seen him since then, but I think he should be back soon. Whatever ‘soon’ means in Lord Seht’s eyes, anyway.”

Not much more information than Luciana had, other than some assurance that he’d be back. The project was a development, however.

“You’ve been working on the Nine Analyses of the Exalted Enigma?”

Varuni looked incredibly pleased. “I have! I took your advice and decided to try to talk to him, and he seemed genuinely thrilled, shockingly enough.”

“Is that shocking?”

“Maybe not, but I’m still getting used to the idea,” she said. “I gathered the courage and approached him after a meeting of the Congress of Calibration to ask him some questions I still had from that conversation a while back. We ended up talking for a while, and then he made his calculating face for a few seconds, and asked if I would be willing to work on the project. He said that since I already knew about, well, the nature of his divinity, I would be an ideal candidate. That and my accomplishments to date, of course.”

“And you agreed.”

“Of course I agreed!” she said, practically radiating enthusiasm. “What an incredible opportunity, to work with the Father of Mysteries himself! I hope I prove as helpful as Barilzar, though I don’t plan to disappear, so I suppose I have an advantage already.”

Ildari fished sunna’rah out of her pack. “Maybe I should leave this with you, then.”

Varuni took the staff and examined it closely. “This looks like an old version of the tool Lord Seht uses to study his divinity. Only…modified into a staff, for some reason.” She looked back at Ildari with a curious expression.

“That’s exactly what it is,” Ildari said. “Clavicus Vile tricked a false incarnate to use it to siphon away Vivec’s energy.”

Varuni looked deeply concerned. “So that was the big threat on the surface? By the Three, that could have been catastrophic. I will be sure to keep this safe until I get back to Lord Seht’s workshop.” She interacted with a projected lock on a cabinet and placed the staff inside.

“Let me know if you hear from him, okay?” Ildari asked.

“Of course,” Varuni said with a smile.

“Thanks, Varuni.”

* * *

Luckily, Iya did not have to do much more asking around, as Seht came to visit her that night when she was about to get ready for bed. He looked a little tired himself, but nothing too concerning. She greeted him with a hug and invited him in.

“How was your time on Vvardenfell?” he asked.

“Eventful. When’s the last time you slept?”

He looked off into the distance in concentration. “Ten days, three hours, eleven minutes, and—Oh. ‘Ten days’ was probably all the information you needed.”

“Ten days? Is that normal?”

He shrugged. “I can go for longer when I am in the Cogitum, as that can be like sleeping, in a way. Otherwise, I prefer to sleep every few days for at least, say, three hours. I sometimes go a week when busy.”

“In that case, sleep before we catch up.”

He shook his head. “There are still tests to run and modifications to make. I’ve already identified a slight variation in the oscillations of the core pallet fork, no doubt a result of leaking chaos from the Daedric incursion.” He frowned and scratched his head. “Or was it just the Wellspring’s fork?”

“And you really think you can address problems in this state, when you can’t even keep track of them?” Iya asked.

“Perhaps not,” Seht admitted.

“Sleep.”

She pointed toward the bed and he climbed in without further complaint. She joined him when she was ready a few minutes later and tried to snuggle up to him.

“You’re really going to make me be the big spoon?” she asked. “You’re almost twice my height.”

He wordlessly hugged her arms to his chest in response and was snoring lightly within seconds.

* * *

They caught up over breakfast in the morning.

“So Vile was willing to kill Vivec just to get to me,” Seht said, gripping his spoon tightly while his voice trembled with ire. “The absolute disregard for the lives of Mundials…”

“Do you know why Vile would have wanted to invade the city?” Ildari asked.

“I don’t, and that is equally troubling. Of course, there are plenty of possibilities, but nothing stands out as an obvious target.” He frowned. “All the more reason to remain vigilant. At least now we know the dangers of depleting our divine energy too much, although I had never hoped to push it so far.”

“Did you know he had taken your tool?”

“I had noticed it was missing, but I assumed Barilzar took it with him when he left. Could be that he did, and he was not careful enough and let it fall into Vile’s hands,” he said. “Perhaps I owe him another visit.”

“Speaking of Barilzar,” Ildari said, “why didn’t you tell me to expect to like him?”

“Oh yes, you met him, didn’t you?” Seht’s expression lightened for a moment, but quickly turned back into a frown. “I suppose you would have had every reason to hate him going in. I did not think of that.”

She nodded. “Not that I was exactly expecting a lich this time, but I _was_ expecting some old necromancer with no regard for anyone but himself.”

“He has not yet delved fully into necromancy, though of course he will eventually,” he said. “Though he has been considering ways to extend his existence for a while, he likely would have put the thought aside with time, were it not for my encouragement, believe it or not. But, as you know, he has an important task to fulfill, and dying of old age is not an option.”

Ildari thought about this as she took a spoonful of nutriment paste. “Why would he even create the Band in the first place?”

“He wanted to leave. I do not make it easy for most people to come and go at will,” Seht said. “I detected his desire to leave and expected him to come to me about it. I would have opened a path for him. Unfortunately, I failed him. Despite our rapport, he did not see me as approachable enough and instead turned to his own methods.”

“Even so, why create an enchanted object that could fall into the hands of, I don’t know, a god on a quest for total domination, for example? Why not just create a spell?”

He smiled faintly. “My Apostles’ intelligence tends to be more in academics than common sense.”

“That’s really what it comes down to, isn’t it? ‘Mortal folly.’” She stared down at the table as she spoke. “He made a dumb decision, and had to devote his life—more than his life—to atoning for it. And I killed him. I killed him for defending you.”

“You could not have known. You had every reason to trust Almalexia and none to trust a lich living in the sewers.”

She shrugged. “I still feel like the villain. I’m sure that’s how Barilzar saw me.”

“Perhaps. But the end was inevitable. If you had not retrieved the Band, Almalexia would have sent someone else. If you had retrieved it but refused to give it to her, she would have killed you or found another way in. I have never projected a scenario where Almalexia fails to kill me.” He tried to give Iya a reassuring look. “He had an impossible task, Ildari, and you granted him a merciful end.”

Somehow, she did not feel reassured.

“I kind of wish I hadn’t met him in this time,” she mumbled into her spoon. “Wish I could go back to thinking of him as an evil lich.”

“I, for one, am glad that you know who he truly is,” Seht said softly. “He bears an incredible burden. He deserves to be known for who he is now, before that burden consumes him.”

They were quiet for some time, both reflecting everything they had discussed, until Ildari finally brought the conversation back to the Daedric threat.

“Is there anything I can do to help with the City’s defenses?”

“Not directly. The City’s defenses are something I trust only myself to handle,” Seht said. “But I appreciate the offer. If you would like to help, stay watchful for any signs of what Vile might be planning to do next: anything out of the ordinary, any relevant news from the surface, any messages from Azura, if she deigns to stay in contact now that the immediate threat to Vvardenfell is handled…anything helps.”

“I will keep an eye out.”

“Thank you.” Seht stood up. “Now that I am refreshed, I must return to the City’s defenses. Be sure to let me know anything you might learn, and keep in touch with Luciana and Varuni.” He paused for a moment to think. “Hm…I had a strange dream last night. Have you been to Tel Fyr yet?”

“Not…recently.”

Seht smiled. “It is only in the late stages of construction now. Next time you are on Vvardenfell, consider stopping by. Divayth may need your help with something. And please give him my love.”

“Sure, but are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

He scratched his chin. “I need to confirm whether my dream was indicative of anything first. Could be nothing, but you should see the tower regardless.”

“Right.” Always mysterious, even in casual situations.

He smiled again and leaned down to kiss her on the forehead, and then disappeared into light.


	22. Halls of Fabrication (sometimes a family is eight Vestiges in a trenchcoat)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari and friends (and friends' friends) deal with a rift to the Clockwork City that has opened in Tel Fyr.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is definitely the second most ridiculous chapter of this fic that also exists for the sake of puns.
> 
> Minmari and Lior will almost certainly be back sometime, but Shasirba, Dances, and Vaynerii are less likely. And Tal and Mils are already recurring.

Ildari felt a strange, yet familiar presence outside the bug house. Daedric, she identified, but if someone had simply summoned a scamp, she would not have even looked up from her book. This was different. She thought for a moment, trying to place the sense, until she realized where she had felt it before. Was this Minmari, the Demiprince of Plans? She had met them before—it could probably even be argued that they were friends—shortly before the Oblivion crisis. Apparently, Azura had been planning on sending Ildari back in to deal with that, but Mephala and Boethiah had intervened and sent their Demiprince instead as a “thank you” to Ildari for reinstating them to the Dunmer people, on the condition that she train Minmari in how to pass as a mortal.

She exited her room just as the Demiprince came through the front door. They looked more comfortable in their pseudo-Dunmeri form than they had when Ildari had first met them, though they still carried some indiscernible knitting project. She wondered if Minmari was also “from the future,” if such a conceptualization worked for Daedra. That had to be the case, as the Oblivion crisis was Minmari’s first time taking a mortal form to spend time on Nirn. Still, she waited for Minmari to speak first, so that she did not unintentionally reveal anything out of time.

“Ildari,” the Demiprince said. “My Prince-parents sent me to make sure you are doing well, and that Azura does not place you under too much burden. I have kept an eye on you since shortly after you arrived in this time, and I have been planning to check in with you directly for some time, but, well, you know that I am better at having plans than I am at executing them. Of course, I cannot keep track of you when you are in the Clockwork City, but I understand that Sotha Sil has also taken up the same responsibility.”

Honestly, it was a relief not only to see Minmari, but also to learn that the other two Good Daedra were interested in keeping her safe again.

“It’s good to see you, Minmari,” Ildari said. “And I appreciate you checking in. How is your time in the Second Era going so far?”

“It is interesting,” they said. “This is not my first time taking on a mortal form, of course, but it is the first time that I have spent time in Morrowind while the Tribunal are still at the height of their power. I find it is all the more important to appear mortal, lest some Tribunal zealot forget about their ancestors and try to kill me.”

“I know the feeling,” Ildari said. “Well, not the ‘trying to look mortal’ part, but the part about getting killed by a Tribunal zealot.”

“Of the actual Tribunal, I have only personally met Almalexia so far. She tolerates me, so long as I bow to her and keep my Daedric nature hidden to her people. Luckily, I have had a good teacher in the mortal ways,” they added with a smile.

“Glad to have helped,” she said. “But are you comfortable living with Tribunal worshippers? Talvini and Milia are out right now, but they’re the primary residents of this house, and they’re pretty devout.”

“I don’t anticipate any problems, but I also do not intend to stay here long. I will likely be staying with Lior when she arrives,” Minmari said. “Do you know Lior?”

Ildari shook her head.

“She is Azura’s Demiprince. She plans to come and take advantage of the dragonbreak and spend time on Nirn while I am also here,” they said. “She is…my girlfriend, you might say. That is the closest approximation of the Ehlnofex, at least.”

“I look forward to meeting her, then,” Ildari said, though in her heart, she was wary of any loyal Daedric servant of Azura. “Will she also need mortal lessons?”

“Hmm…” Minmari made a few stitches in their knitting project, and then laughed. “Most likely, yes. I will try my best to instruct her, but we may be coming to you with questions, as long as you do not mind.”

“Of course not,” Ildari said. “I would love to meet her, anyway.” Or, at least, she would love to know who her Prince’s Demiprince was so that she could avoid any missteps, or stay informed of any action Azura might be taking that Ildari might want to know about.

Minmari seemed to detect her suspiciousness, but was unbothered by it, instead giving a simple nod and a small, knowing smile. “Then we shall be seeing you again soon.”

Without further ado, Minmari vanished.

* * *

When Ildari was in Vivec City a week or so later, she encountered a projection of Divayth Fyr.

“Ildari. Good to see you,” Divayth said. “I’m having a bit of trouble here at Tel Fyr. More trouble than even I am willing to address on my own, if I’m being honest. Is there any chance you could stop by and help me deal with it? You do have a personal stake in me having a working laboratory, after all.”

“Sure.” She wondered whether this was related to whatever strange dream Seht had when she was last in the Clockwork City, that she had been meaning to check on.

“Good. Try to round up, oh, eleven or so adventurer friends, if you can. Make sure some know how to heal or withstand blows—I’m sure you know the drill.”

“You really expect me to have eleven adventurer friends?”

“Just bring whoever you can. I’m sure House Telvanni can spare a few more retainers if needed, though they’re already complaining that I’ve used too many.”

“I’ll see who I can find,” Ildari said.

“Excellent. You know where to find me, of course, but if you’re in Vivec, one of my retainers can transport you.”

* * *

She stopped home to the bug house for her first wave of recruiting.

“Serjo Fyr needs help?” Talvini asked. “I don’t know what any of us could do that he couldn’t do himself, but of course I’ll help.”

Milia’s reaction was of a different variety. “Hang on a second,” she said. “We’re your grandmothers, right? So that means that at least until we have a kid who’s going to be your mother, we’re protected by prophecy.”

“I…suppose that’s true,” Ildari said.

“Then we can do whatever we want, and we won’t die!” Milia said. “Who cares if this is dangerous? Count me in!”

They also agreed to talk to three more Vestiges: a Khajiit named Shasirba who had known Talvini since they had both started their adventures, an Argonian named Dances-Forth-Light who was said to always be eager to heal her friends, and another Dunmer named Vaynerii, who apparently also had some healing abilities.

While Talvini and Milia were out the next morning, Ildari summoned Minmari with a skein of fine Daedric spidersilk yarn.

Minmari appeared and picked up the yarn. They examined it closely before putting it into their bag with a satisfied look. “How can I help you?”

“Would you be willing to come with me to Tel Fyr tomorrow to help Divayth Fyr deal with…something? He hasn’t said quite what.”

“Fyr? Sure. I’ll bring Lior.”

“Ah, Lior has arrived?” Ildari asked, trying to hide her apprehension.

“Yes, the day after the last time we spoke.”

“Excellent. The more, the merrier,” she said. “Well, the more, the less likely we are to be totally obliterated by whatever’s going on in Fyr’s tower.”

“Something to do with clockwork constructs, I imagine,” Minmari said, staring off into a non-space. “The details are foggy, but it has Sotha Sil’s signature.”

That much did not surprise Ildari, but it did serve as some additional evidence that Seht’s cryptic message would be relevant here.

“Well, thank you. I look forward to seeing you both tomorrow.”

Minmari nodded and disappeared.

* * *

Ildari, Talvini, and Milia traveled to Tel Fyr together the next day. Shasirba and Dances-Forth-Light were waiting for them outside the tower when they arrived.

“Oh, good, this one was beginning to worry that you were not coming,” the Khajiit said. She turned to Ildari. “You are the one organizing this adventure—Ildari, yes? It is good to meet you. Shas hopes she can trust you not to lead us all to our deaths, but she trusts Talvini, and that is good enough.”

Dances seemed less social. “I am here to offer healing to anyone who needs it,” she said. “Beyond that, I have no interest in helping the Telvanni.”

They entered the tower and found Divayth Fyr and a number of others in the foyer. Once they were more than a few steps inside, they could see the bodies lining the floor. Apparently “a bit of trouble” was a bit of an understatement. Ildari began to worry about what she had dragged her friends and friends’ friends into.

She approached Divayth for a briefing.

“Glad to see you made it,” Divayth said. “And glad to see you’ve brought friends. I only have a few retainers to spare.”

“What’s going on?” Ildari asked.

“It seems Sil has opened a rift in my basement,” Divayth said.

Ildari forced a pensive expression, despite the rich pun material he had just given her. “Did you really call me here to gossip about your sex life? I thought you said there was a problem.”

“Ildari…” Talvini whispered in a chiding voice, while Milia burst out laughing.

“Oh, shut up, Iya,” Divayth said, though his face showed hidden amusement. He folded his arms and waited for Milia to stop laughing before he continued explaining. “There is a _literal_ rift into what looks like the Clockwork City in the caves through that door.” He indicated the door next to him. “I don’t know what Sil’s playing at, but there are all sorts of fabricants pouring through.”

“I think he misses you,” Ildari said. “When we woke up the day after I returned from helping Vivec, he told me he had a strange dream and asked me to check on you and give you his love.” She offered her fist for him to bump with his own. “Does this suffice?”

“That will do just fine,” he said, accepting the fist bump.

“When you woke up—Did you _sleep_ with—” Talvini stumbled through incredulity.

Ildari and Divayth exchanged a look while Milia put her arm around Tal to keep her stable.

“In the literal sense,” Ildari said. “This time, anyway.”

As they were finishing their briefing, Minmari arrived (through the front door, thankfully), accompanied by a shorter not-quite-Breton and a winged twilight. Ildari broke away from the rest of the party and hurried over to them, in the hopes of making introductions before her grandmothers caught onto the fact that they were now sharing the tower with two Daedric Demiprinces.

“Ildari!” the not-quite-Breton and, curiously, the winged twilight spoke in unison. She seemed to catch herself when Minmari put a hand on her shoulder, and used only her mortal-like voice to continue speaking. “I’ve seen so much of you throughout your lives, and my Prince Azura talks about you all the time! It is so nice to have a chance to meet you in person! Please forgive my mortal form—well, you don’t know my regular form, anyway, so I guess it’s fine.”

Minmari whispered something in Ehlnofex to Lior that Ildari could not quite catch, but Lior’s eyes widened, and she nodded intently.

“Sorry!” Lior whispered loudly. “I forgot I should keep my voice down.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Lior,” Ildari said in a quiet voice. “But it is probably best to keep your nature a secret while we’re here. At least two of our party are devout followers of the Tribunal.”

Lior looked disgusted and craned over Ildari’s shoulder to see who she was talking about. “Which ones? Those two?” She pointed at Talvini and Milia, until Minmari gently lowered her hand.

“Please be nice,” Ildari said. “They’re my grandmothers, and my friends.”

Lior sighed dramatically. “Only for you, Nerevarine.”

Talvini and Milia joined them moments later.

“Just waiting for Vaynerii, I think,” Milia said.

As if on cue, another Dunmer walked through the door. She came over to them and greeted the group with a bow.

“Are you Ildari?” she asked. “I’m Vaynerii. I think I’ve seen you around the Mournhold Temple. The Sacred Lady sure likes to spend time with you, doesn’t she?”

To their side, Talvini looked as incredulous as she had before. Ildari noted her expression, but was more focused on Vaynerii. She was certainly no priest; any time she had spent around the Mournhold Temple was likely for reconnaissance reasons. Ildari would recognize the stance of a Morag Tong assassin anywhere, having been one herself, and it also struck her that Vaynerii had managed an introduction without saying anything useful about herself. While healing was an interesting role for an assassin, she got the sense that this one’s job was more to gather information than to do much dirty work, though there was certainly blood on her hands.

Once the introductions were done, they proceeded toward the door. A hand on Ildari’s shoulder slowed her down.

“Careful of that one,” Minmari whispered. “She may be a Tribunal worshipper, but she’s also one of Mephala’s.”

“I noticed,” Ildari said. “Would you know if she had a writ on anyone here?”

“I might, and I don’t, which is probably a good sign. Still, I’ll keep an eye on her.”

“Thanks, Min.”

* * *

Once inside the caves, they were accosted by a number of constructs: some Dwemeri, and some definitely of Seht’s own making. They fought off a few bigger ones while Divayth stabilized the rift. Once it was stable, they all passed through it, hoping to stop whatever was causing the automata to come through in the first place.

They were let out somewhere that was definitely in the Clockwork City. It looked to be one of the regions uninhabited by mortals, or much organic life at all.

“If I know Sil’s city, we’re in the Halls of Fabrication right now,” Divayth said. “You lot deal with these constructs. I’ll run ahead and see what more I can learn.”

They continued to fight through the Halls. At every step, a booming mechanical voice made some commentary on their progress, usually noting that there were “vermin” in some circuit and that it would send even more automata to address them. Ildari wondered just how much of the Clockwork City’s resources were going toward trying to keep them out right now, and whether this really was Seht’s plan.

After a while, they caught up with Divayth. They dealt with what seemed to be a committee of factotums while Divayth tinkered with some control panels.

“Are you listening, construct?” he asked once they had defeated the committee.

“Query denied: Creator not found,” the booming voice replied.

“Close enough. We’re coming for you, you chattering collection of cogs!”

After much more fighting, they arrived at a room that looked like a control center, with a giant automaton inside.

“Initializing internal scan,” said the booming voice that they had been hearing throughout their adventure.

“Well, well. Now that’s the second largest construct I’ve ever seen,” Divayth said.

“You’ve seen the Numidium?” Ildari asked, just to his side. “Oh, I see. You meant second only to Sil’s d—Agh!” A sharp elbow to her ribs prevented her from finishing her sentence.

“I _was_ talking about the Numidium, Ildari.”

Ildari laughed while trying to catch her breath. “Yeah, I deserved that.”

Dances-Forth-Light sent her a healing beam and a nod of approval.

“Organic contamination detected within control center,” the voice announced. “Assuming manual control. Surrogate avatar…synchronized.”

The giant construct powered up.

“This must be the Assembly General’s giant metal body,” Divayth said. He looked ahead to the opposite end of the room. “Aha! There’s its cogitation array, in the distance. Keep the body distracted while I unravel its mind.”

“You want us to fight this thing?” Ildari asked.

“Yes, I thought that much was obvious.”

“It’s in charge of making all of the City’s fabricants, right? Isn’t it sort of important?”

“And my tower isn’t? I’m only asking you to destroy its body. Sil can rebuild it. Or, it can probably rebuild itself. Go on, now.” He jogged across the room to the cogitation array, making sure to be safely out of the way before they sparked the automaton’s aggression.

Naturally, the Assembly General was tougher than the other constructs they had fought so far and seemed to be doing everything in its power to purge the Halls of what it saw as “organic contamination.” It tried fire, poison, spinning knives, and even fabricated “clones” of the combatants. The latter was interesting, if a bit unsettling. Ildari couldn’t help but be impressed at the lengths Seht had gone to to protect his Halls of Fabrication, as much as she wondered what could possibly have possessed him to open the rift in Divayth’s tower. Surely a projection would have been easier?

When the General was nearly destroyed, it came to the center of the room and began blasting them with as many fireballs as it could in some last ditch effort to destroy them. It got a little hot, even for a Dunmer, but they were ultimately able to disable it.

“Finally. Quiet,” Divayth said when they rejoined him by the cogitation array. “Now, to study this mechanism in peace. It would take years to sort through this information…though perhaps I can repurpose an animunculus to sift through the archives.”

“You’re really going to study it?” Ildari asked. “You’re not just going to go to the Cogitum to tell Sil you solved his rift puzzle or something?”

“Of course I’m going to study it. Why else do you think Sil led us here?”

“I assumed he was trying to get your attention.”

“Oh, I have no doubt that he was. But how would it look for me to come to him empty-handed?”

“Like you’re eager to see him, maybe. How long has it been since the last time you were here in the City?”

“Not long after you arrived. What was that, a year ago?”

“You haven’t seen Sil in a year?”

“We’ve been together for over three thousand years. Surely we can stand a year apart once in a while. We’ve gone much longer before.”

“Divayth. He opened a rift in your basement, and not even in the sexy way. He misses you.”

“Fine.” He threw his arms up with a sigh. “Give me a week to sort through this information, and then I’ll go see him. You and that thrice-damned ring…”

“Thrice-_blessed_,” Ildari corrected him. “And besides”—she held up her hands for him to see—“I’m not wearing Moon-and-Star. I’m just right.”

Divayth rolled his eyes and opened a portal back to Tel Fyr.

“Out you go. Let me sort through this material in peace. Wouldn’t want to keep Sil waiting. Tell the other Telvanni still at the tower that the danger is taken care of and I’ll be back…sometime.”

* * *

Once back at Tel Fyr, Ildari thanked the rest of the crew for their help and alerted the Telvanni construction overseer that they had dealt with the rift problem.

“Tal and I are going to get drinks in Sadrith Mora, if any of you want to come,” Milia said to the group.

Ildari debated whether it would be weird to drink with her grandmothers, but as they were the ones suggesting it, she decided to accept the invitation. Most of the group went to leave, but Ildari noticed that Vaynerii hung back. A look to Minmari told her that they had noticed as well. She wouldn’t have thought much of it, if Vaynerii were not part of the Morag Tong, They approached her, trying to look casual.

“Thanks for your healing, sera,” Ildari said. “Will you be coming with us for drinks?”

“I’ll be right behind you,” Vaynerii said with an easy smile. “Just want to check in with my friend first.” She nodded in the vague direction of some of the workers.

“Oh, I didn’t realize you already had friends here outside our group. Which one, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Falsa, over there,” she pointed in a slightly more defined direction, but still toward a group of three Dunmer.

“The one with the long braid?”

Vaynerii nodded, again with an easy smile.

“That’s Meryne; I talked to her earlier. Walk with us?”

They kept Vaynerii in their view as they walked around a corner, out of sight of the others in the tower.

“Whom do you have a writ on?” Minmari asked.

Vaynerii feigned confusion. “I’m not sure what you mean, sera.”

Minmari glanced at Ildari, who looked around the corner to make sure no one was coming, and then nodded back at Minmari. Minmari reverted to their Daedric form, growing several feet taller and sprouting two new pairs of arms and a few extra sets of eyes.

“I ask again with the authority of the Webspinner: On whom do you have a Writ of Honorable Execution?”

Vaynerii’s eyes widened, and she bowed low before the Demiprince.

“Please forgive my ignorance, Demiprince,” she said. “I did not expect you to be involved with our mortal affairs.”

“Ildari offered me a very nice skein of yarn,” Minmari said. “Need I repeat my question?”

“No, my apologies. I do not have a Writ of Honorable Execution at this time. I am simply doing some research for another agent who does.”

“Is their writ on anyone from our group?”

“No, Demiprince,” Vaynerii said. “It is on Arilina Drano. She seems to be friends with the one with the long braid. Meryne.” She looked briefly at Ildari. “Thanks for getting me her name. That will help with my research.”

Minmari kept all of their eyes locked on Vaynerii for several, extremely long seconds while they finished a row of their indiscernible knitting project. Ildari wondered whether they were actually scanning to see whether Vaynerii was telling the truth, or if it was a simple intimidation tactic. Finally, they nodded and returned to their semi-mortal form.

“Good. Continue with your research, then.”

Vaynerii bowed again and went back around the corner to return to her field work. Ildari and Minmari gave her a few seconds before also leaving the alcove.

“I could have told you she didn’t have a writ on any of them,” Lior said when they met back up with her. She landed her winged twilight aspect on Minmari’s shoulder as they began to head for the exit.

“Could have, but why pass up the opportunity to make a Tribunal-loyal Tong agent squirm?”

Once outside the tower, they left Vaynerii to her work and recalled to Sadrith Mora to join the others.


	23. Mortal lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari teaches Lior how to boil water and that mortals have feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are some references to [this story](https://tonal-modulator.tumblr.com/post/190764388138/mortal-101-lesson-1-mortals-lie) about Minmari’s mortal lessons, but it’s not necessary background reading or anything.

Ildari was working on an enchanting experiment in the upstairs workshop of the bughouse when she heard a _whoosh_ and a knock on the front door. There was definitely a Daedric presence that there hadn’t been moments ago, but it was diffuse, as if spread across two bodies, and carried an Azuran signature. She set down the soul gem and went to invite Lior inside.

“Ildari!” Lior greeted her when she opened the door. “Will you teach me how to cook?”

“How to cook?” Ildari repeated, stepping aside to let Lior in. She had expected cooking to be one of the later mortal lessons, after establishing concepts like “knives and fire can be dangerous to mortal forms.” But then, Lior had already been living on Nirn with Minmari for a little while, and they had likely already covered the basics.

“Yeah, how to cook! Minmari said that mortals need to eat, and that you normally cook food. But Min usually just lights things on fire and calls them done, and it seems pretty different from food you find just about anywhere else. It also doesn’t taste very good, but maybe that’s just mortal food in general.”

Ildari laughed, but was not remotely surprised to hear that Minmari’s cooking skills were lacking. Their cooking lessons had been delayed for a while (it was some time before Ildari felt they could be trusted with knives, especially around Vivec, who was always trying to cause trouble), and they never really reached a satisfactory conclusion before Minmari had to go off on their hero duty. Not for lack of trying, but Minmari never quite made it past their brute force approach to cooking. And it sounded like that was still true even now. Ildari considered suggesting that Minmari join them for this lesson, but decided that that might do more harm than good.

“Sure, I’ll teach you to cook.” She led Lior over to the kitchen area on the far side of the main room. “Let’s start with something simple, like saltrice. I’m assuming you already know the basics of kitchen safety?” She handed Lior an apron and put one on herself.

“Knives will cut you if you grab the blade, and pain actually hurts,” Lior said, looking down at her own hand. Ildari suspected she may have learned that lesson the hard way. “Fire is also hot.”

“And everything around the fire also gets hot, which is why you need potholders.” Ildari picked up a pot, filled it with water, and set it on the counter. “Hair can also catch fire. Tie yours back, please.”

Lior rustled around in her pocket and pulled out a hair tie, and used it to tie her hair into a quick bun.

Ildari handed Lior a measuring cup and pointed to a sack. “Would you fill this with saltrice and add it to the water?” Lior did as asked. “Now, we can light the stove. There are mechanical ways to do it, but we’re all mages here.” She sent a small stream of flame from her hand to light the burner and set the pot over it. “And now we wait for it to boil.”

“That’s it?” Lior looked surprised.

“For now.”

“How long will it take?”

“A few minutes. Luckily, we have some leftover nix stew. Making this from scratch would be too complicated for today’s lesson, but reheating it is easy.” She took the container of nix stew out of the icebox, along with another pot and spoon from the shelves. She transferred the stew to the pot and said, “Why don’t you start the other burner?”

“Just throw fire at it?” Lior asked.

“_Carefully._ Just a little fire.”

She stood nearby to throw a dispulsion if anything went wrong, but Lior managed to create just a small stream of fire like she had seen Ildari do moments earlier.

“Great! Now turn that knob to make the fire about half as high, and then put the pot of stew on.”

Once the pot was safely on the stove, Ildari handed Lior the spoon. “Give it a slow, constant stir, and keep an eye on the heat. If it gets too hot, turn the fire down again. Let’s be honest: you don’t want to tell Minmari we managed to burn your first cooked meal.”

When the saltrice had begun to boil, Ildari instructed Lior to lower the flame and cover the pot, and then return to stirring the stew. They filled the gaps by talking about Lior’s time on Nirn so far. She had been spending most of her time in Daggerfall Covenant territory, which Ildari was not as familiar with, aside from Pariah Abbey, where Lior had naturally spent some time helping Azura.

“I don’t think any of them knew exactly who I was—Azura told me to keep it on the down-low—but it was still so nice to meet a bunch of Azura’s servants in person. And to see them worshipping in public! I thought most mortals hated Daedra, but they let Azura’s servants keep a whole abbey right out in the open.”

When the meal was done cooking, they safely extinguished the flames, plated the food, and took it over to the couches in the main part of the room.

“We’d normally eat at a dinner table, but this is comfier. Just be careful not to spill it.”

“This place _is_ comfy,” Lior said. “So you live here? I thought this was where those Tribunal worshippers lived.”

“Talvini and Milia?” Ildari did not feel like reiterating that they were her ancestors and friends. “This is where they live, but I also stay here with them when I’m on Nirn.”

“When you’re on Nirn? Where else would you be? You don’t smell like Oblivion.”

Ildari paused mid-bite and hesitated. She had somehow not anticipated the question, and knew Lior would not like the answer. But, if Lior was going to spend time here, she would have to get used to the idea of the Tribunal being around.

“I spend a lot of my time in the Clockwork City.”

“You—_where?_ Why?” Lior looked appalled, and her winged twilight aspect, which had been floating idly above them, was now flying in agitated circles around the room. “Is that horrible usurper holding you prisoner? Do you need a rescue? I’m sure my mom could help you—”

“I’m not a prisoner there—I’m here now, see?” Ildari said. “I live there because I like it there. Sotha Sil is my friend.”

“He’s your friend? How could you be friends with that monster? He betrayed you! He’s _killed_ you!”

Ildari wanted to point out that the Tribunal was not unique in that regard, but she suspected that would not go over well. Besides, there was a deeper point here, the same one that had been nagging at her about Azura ever since she had regained her memories years ago.

“The Tribunal betrayed their oath to me well over three thousand years ago. Seventeen lifetimes ago. Before that, they were some of my closest friends. Am I supposed to throw that all away for a millennia-old grudge?”

“A few millennia is nothing,” Lior said.

“It’s seventeen lifetimes.”

“Only because mortal lives are so short.”

“I know,” Ildari said. “And yet we manage to fit an entire life’s worth of experience into those few centuries, or even decades. We don’t have the luxury of agelessness—most of us, anyway—and we certainly don’t have the luxury of invulnerability. So we work to make sure our brief existence is a fulfilling one. We right what wrongs we can, repair or sever strained bonds, because we know any moment could be our last.”

Lior’s winged twilight aspect had now landed on her Breton aspect’s shoulder, and both were watching Ildari with deep focus.

“I’m in a unique situation—most mortals only get one life, and I’m on my eighteenth—but that only makes me intimately familiar with the fragility of a mortal existence, and I know that this is my last one. Sure, I may not have to worry about aging or disease, but if someone were to come up and slit my throat right now, I’d be dead. Forever.” Her hand involuntarily floated up to her neck as she tried to push away the memories of the times she had, in fact, been killed in that way. “This is my last chance to have my friends back.”

“But why would you _want_ them back after what they did? Aren’t you angry?”

“Of course I was angry for a while. But holding a grudge for even one lifetime—even a few years—is exhausting. Actively hating people takes so much energy. There are reasons one might hold onto a grudge, but normally it’s easier to reconcile or cut ties altogether. The latter would have been difficult, given my particular situation, and the former is better anyway.”

“What about your Dwarf-King? You held a grudge against him for a while.”

“That was more of a war than a grudge. And while thirty years may be a long time, it’s orders of magnitude less than three thousand,” she said. “Besides, Dumac is gone now. There’s no reconciliation left to be had.”

“The Dagoth, then?”

Her jaw tightened, but she forced herself to relax and even laugh. “What of Voryn? What point are you trying to make, that I had poor choice in men?”

“Just that you didn’t exactly run back into his arms. I thought he was important to you too.”

“I would have,” Ildari said after a breath. “If he had been anything like the Voryn I knew, I absolutely would have run into his arms. I didn’t kill him over a grudge; I killed him because he was actively and unrepentantly posing a threat to Morrowind, and, if he’d succeeded, to all of Tamriel. I killed him because I had to. The Tribunal aren’t doing anything like that.”

“They’re still murderous, oath-breaking monsters,” Lior grumbled.

“Breaking an oath doesn’t make one a monster.” She was starting to lose some patience.

“What about killing you?”

“Azura has killed me a number of times, and I still serve her,” Ildari said, immediately cursing herself for letting Nerevar’s impulsiveness shine through.

Lior narrowed her eyes.

“I didn’t mean that as a slight,” Ildari fumbled to correct herself. “I only meant that if I am still willing to serve Azura knowing that she has killed me, then of course I would be willing to stay friends with—”

“Azura has killed you?” Lior asked in a quiet, faraway voice, her eyes filled with concern.

“Did…did you not know that?”

“But you’re her favorite mortal,” Lior continued as if she hadn’t spoken. “Why would she kill you?”

Ildari chewed her lip and set her plate down on the coffee table. How could she explain this to Azura’s own daughter without causing irreparable harm? She nervously spun Moon-and-Star while she considered her words.

“I won’t speak for you, but in my experience, Daedra tend to see mortals as tools,” she began slowly. “It’s not out of love that Azura has given me so many chances at life; it’s because she needed me to fulfill a prophecy. There were times when I was clearly going to fail to fulfill the prophecies, and so she killed me so that she could have my soul back and prepare for the next incarnation. It’s the same reason this is my last life: I’ve already fulfilled the prophecies, and so she doesn’t really need me anymore.”

“But if what you say is true, and mortals cram so much life into their lives, why would she cut yours short? Does she not understand the nature of mortals’ existences? Or are you lying?” She hugged her winged twilight aspect to her chest as one might hug one’s own knees for comfort, and stared Ildari in the eyes. “No, I can tell you’re not lying,” she said at last. “But Azura knows everything. What am I missing?”

Ildari knew she was in a dangerous position. She was sure that she had already said enough to spark Azura’s ire on her own behalf, and now she was dragging the Demiprince down with her. To continue the conversation would no doubt be disastrous, but Lior would not accept her going back on what she had said now. She idly wished they were in a Tribunal temple that was warded against Daedric reconnaissance, but that would come with difficulty of its own. She was still contemplating how to proceed when another Daedric presence entered the room, surrounded by what felt like a dampening field, and Ildari remembered what Minmari had said about keeping an eye on her.

“Rough lesson?” Minmari asked as they sat down on the couch next to Lior and wrapped an arm around her. In a quieter voice, they asked, “Do you need a ward?”

“That would be nice,” Ildari said.

They looked at Lior. “I’ll need to borrow your signature so that you’re not excluded.” The two Demiprinces held hands, and with their free hand, Minmari flung a glowing rune onto the floor of the room and let their own dampening field dissipate. “All clear.”

“Thanks, Min,” Ildari said. She looked back at Lior. “You asked what you’re missing.” She hesitated, still unsure how much the ward would protect her from Lior’s own wrath in defense of her Prince mother. “Will you permit me some minor blasphemy?”

Lior nodded solemnly.

She considered her words further. “It’s not that I think Azura doesn’t _know_ what a mortal existence is like, in a strict sense,” she said. “She knows about life and death and what we do in between. But I don’t think she could ever understand it.”

Lior tilted her head in question.

“She exists on a scale that’s incomprehensible to me, even as a relatively long-lasting mortal,” she continued. “I think that mortals likewise exist on a scale that’s so small as to be incomprehensible to her. I think, in particular—again, please forgive my blasphemy—that she may never understand love as mortals do.”

“Of course she understands love!” Lior said, her energy suddenly having returned. “Love is what she _does_. Love is how she interacts with everyone.”

“I know,” Ildari said, “but every mortal who has served Azura knows that her love is different. It’s powerful, but turbulent. Conditional. Mortal love, believe it or not, tends to be more stable and resilient. Maybe it’s because we need stability. Maybe it’s that we work to fix things before it’s too late. Either way, my love for my friends can withstand a broken promise, or, in the right circumstances, getting killed once in a while.”

Lior’s eyes were once again distant. “Will I ever be able to understand?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” Ildari said after a moment of thought. “As an immortal being, you might not. But here, in a semi-mortal form, maybe you could.” She glanced to Minmari for help.

“It takes practice,” Minmari said. “If you’re paying attention, you’ll start to understand with time, though you might notice yourself getting a little soft in the process.” They gently ran their fingers through Lior’s hair, which had come out of its bun when they were done cooking. “Sometimes I even balk at murder if I like the person. Can’t wait to get an earful from my Princes over that. Still, it’s worth it.”

“Hmm. I guess I should try it. Getting a little soft might not be too bad, if it helps me understand mortals better.” Her winged twilight aspect floated back into the air as her Breton head leaned against Minmari’s shoulder. “Will Azura be angry, though, if I try to understand mortals?”

“You can answer that better than either of us can,” Minmari said.

Lior sat quietly in thought for a moment. “I can’t decide. I need to invoke prophecy.” The eyes on both her bodies glowed purple for a few seconds, and then faded back to normal. “She’ll tolerate it,” she said. “She won’t really like it, and she’ll make some comments, but as long as I do what she requires of me, I won’t get in any real trouble. I think it’s worth it, then.”

Ildari nodded, hesitant to say anything more about Azura. “What was that thing you did with your eyes?” she asked instead.

“When I invoked prophecy? I just looked into the future. It’s not as easy or clear as when Azura does it, but I can still get a pretty good idea of simpler things once in a while,” Lior said. “Is that not something mortals do?”

“Not normally,” Ildari said. “You might want to keep that hidden.”

“Got it!” Lior said. “I’m learning so much today. Oh!” She handed her half-eaten plate of nix stew and saltrice to Minmari. “Want some? We didn’t even burn it!”

Minmari accepted the plate and took a bite. “Impressive,” they said. “Not burnt at all.”

Lior looked like she had been given the height of praise. “Thanks! I had a good teacher!” She looked sheepishly at Ildari and said, “I’m sorry I didn’t know about Azura killing you.”

“It’s okay; it led to a learning experience.”

“And I’m sorry I brought up your exes to try to make a point.”

She laughed. “That was a little rough,” she said. “Hopefully you’ll learn to temper your jabs the more you understand mortals.”

“Yeah, maybe I will!” she said enthusiastically. “Hey, one more question. If you know that your mortal love is different from Azura’s, and that she’s willing to hurt you for her own goals, why do you still love her?”

Ildari took a second to think. As tolerant as Lior had been so far, she could not tell her the truth: that while Nerevar had loved Azura, that love had worn down over the ages, with the last bits falling away when she was faced with the reality of fulfilling her prophecies. That she now only served Azura out of obligation and fear of defying her. That the closest thing she had to love left was the remaining bond formed from familiarity. No, Lior could not know that. It would break her Daedric heart—an unbearable thought in itself—and she would risk being reminded of what Azura’s wrath looks like.

Instead, she smiled and said, “I guess mortal love just endures.”

She exchanged a covert look with Minmari, who nodded almost imperceptibly with approval. She knew they were both thinking of what Minmari had learned at one of their first mortal lessons: mortals lie. She hoped for everyone’s sake that Lior didn’t fully understand that yet.


	24. Gods blasphemed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari returns to the Clockwork City when it seems that the Daedric Plot has reached Sotha Sil.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the Clockwork City story is going to have to be tweaked a fair bit, since Ildari already lives in the CWC, and she already knows Sotha Sil, and Varuni and Luciana already know more than they "should" and Varuni in particular is already in her wrestling stage, and Ildari is getting near-explicit orders not to shine a lamp on Sotha Sil in the middle of a lecture. So this should be fun!

Ildari knelt at Almalexia’s feet while they waited for the last of the Hands to depart from the chamber so that they could begin their relatively sensitive discussion. Divayth simply stood to her side, unwilling to kneel even for appearances’ sake. Once the three of them were alone, they were able to begin.

“Something strange is going on with Sil,” Divayth said. “I was searching for the Skeleton Key—just some routine artifact hunting—and managed to trace it to the Clockwork City, which is strange, because Sil is usually quite adamant about not allowing Daedric artifacts in his ‘holy’ city. I tried to contact him about it, but couldn’t reach him. Have you noticed anything strange, Ayem?”

“He has been quiet lately,” Almalexia said. “Even quieter than he usually is when he’s hooked into his machines.”

Divayth nodded grimly. “I suspect this is related to the recent business with Vivec, but I thought that was Vile’s campaign. Why would Nocturnal be involved?”

“I did have to deal with a shrike back when Azura’s oracles were being kidnapped,” Ildari said. “I think it’s probable—if a bit mind-boggling—that they’re working together.”

While Almalexia looked largely unsurprised, Divayth made a noise of disgust.

“I trust you two can investigate and take care of this?” Almalexia asked.

“That’s practically my job,” Ildari said with a small laugh, despite her nervousness.

“And I trust that you will be discreet about it? We don’t need rumors floating around about our fallibility, even if they’re mostly contained in Seht’s city.”

“Of course.”

“Good.” She gave Divayth a sharp look to indicate that he was included in that request. “You should take a more conventional means of travel, in order to avoid attracting attention—such as the simulacrum in Bamz-Amschend that I don’t know about.”

“Right.” Divayth turned to Ildari. “We should head out. I’ll meet you by the waterfall.”

As he left the chamber, Almalexia caught Ildari’s hand. “I don’t trust him for a second to care about appearances, so try to keep him reined in as much as possible.”

“I will do my best.”

“Good.” She kissed Ildari on the forehead. “Be careful.”

* * *

The celestiodrome dropped them off in the wilderness just outside the Brass Fortress. As they crossed the bridge and drew near the door to the Fortress, Proctor Luciana came out to greet them.

“Divayth Fyr!” she shouted, slamming her hammer on the ground in front of her. “I warned you never to come back here.”

“What in Oblivion is she talking about?” Divayth wondered aloud. “Go speak with her, would you?”

Ildari rolled her eyes, but jogged ahead to meet Luciana.

“And you, auxiliary!” Luciana shouted at her as she approached. “Is this the kind of company you keep?” Once Ildari was close enough, she whispered, “Play along.”

Ildari stopped in front of her, folded her arms, and put on her best defiant tone. “I can keep whatever company I please. Do you really think you can deny me entry? Need I remind you that I am a citizen here?”

“Save it,” Luciana said. “With me. Both of you.”

They followed her into the Fortress and to her office, where Varuni was waiting, pacing nervously. Luciana dismissed the factotum that was sweeping the floor, turned off her own recording devices, and sat down at her desk, motioning for them to sit across from her.

“Sorry for the theatrics,” she said. “Something is going on with Seht, and we can’t risk people knowing. Or realizing that we know.”

“Something to do with Nocturnal, perhaps?” Divayth said.

Varuni paused her pacing for long enough to say, “A Daedra? Preposterous.”

“What makes you say Nocturnal?” Luciana asked.

“You’re really going to entertain his blasphemy?”

“Because I’ve tracked the Skeleton Key here,” Divayth said. “Ildari has her own evidence as well.”

“This is likely related to what happened recently with Vivec. There have been hints at Nocturnal’s involvement from the start. She might actually be working with Clavicus Vile for…whatever it is they’re trying to achieve.”

“Ildari, not you too!” Varuni looked greatly distressed. “What happened with Vivec was different. Vvardenfell is open, vulnerable. Daedra cannot enter the Clockwork City. It’s just impossible.”

“Varuni, I fought Barbas in the city just a couple months ago. We know that there are exceptions to that rule.”

“I…I know.” She quit her pacing and sat down beside Luciana. “But something of this scale…To suggest that a Daedra could be responsible for Lord Seht’s…changes would mean that he could be, well, compromised.”

“Can you tell me what sorts of changes you’ve noticed?”

Varuni looked nervously to Luciana for assistance.

“He’s become volatile, shouting at Apostles for minor mistakes,” Luciana said. “He keeps changing production schedules and infrastructure in unpredictable ways. Even his movements look chaotic.”

“Wait, how long has this been going on?” Divayth asked.

“The past week or two, why?”

“When I tried to reach out to him yesterday, I could swear I detected him on the Throne.”

“It’s funny you should say that,” Luciana said, grabbing a nearby data plaque, “because just about everything—power consumption, factotum patrols, the production schedules that he  _ hasn’t _ tampered with—look like they would if he were on the Throne Aligned. But he’s been in the Brass Fortress; I’ve seen him.”

“Hm. I don’t like this one bit,” Divayth said.

“It must be a test,” Varuni muttered after a moment of silence. “He wants to see if we can trust that there is a logic behind what looks like chaos to a mortal.”

“Seht doesn’t test us like that,” Luciana said. “But if it is a test, then it’s a test of whether we’ll use the information in front of us to protect the city and its residents. And we need you with us on this, Varuni.”

Varuni looked terrified, but finally conceded. “Right. Okay. Three forgive me, but I’ll do whatever I can. I’ll work through my concerns on my own.”

Luciana gave her a small nod and a pat on the arm, and then turned to Ildari.

“Do you think you can pass as Fyr’s assistant? I’m sure some of the lower-ranking Apostles would be more than happy to complain at length about whatever Sotha Sil is making them do. Maybe you can find some sort of pattern.”

“I’ll get right on it.”

“Good. And try to keep this on the down-low. We don’t need mass panic until we know what there is to panic about.”


	25. Shadows and Skeevatons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ildari and friends reveal the nature of Sotha Sil's impostor.

“Not gonna happen,” said Luciana.

Ildari had expected such a response, and was even a little relieved to hear it. The plan that Divayth had proposed was far too public to be compatible with their goal of keeping people from panicking, but Ildari was not exactly in a position to object to the suggestions of Divayth Fyr and expect to have any success. Luciana, on the other hand, could do that just fine. And luckily, Ildari still had an idea of her own.

In her discussions with low-ranking Apostles, Ildari had learned that Sotha Sil had demanded that all the lamps be replaced with new ones that were apparently less efficient, and was causing quite a bit of chaos to get it done. Her next step, of course, was to find the parts to reassemble one of the old lamps to see just what the problem was. She worked with Kireth and Raynor—friends from her previous adventures whom she had run into here—and their rather arrogant Altmer acquaintance, Neramo, to get the lamp together, though they had to be kept relatively in the dark, so to speak, as to the reason.

Divayth’s proposed plan, with which Luciana had taken issue, was to shine the lamp on Sotha Sil in the middle of a lecture, exposing the results to any Apostle in attendance. Ildari’s plan was a little subtler, though still definitely risky.

“Divayth, you have access to Seht’s chambers, don’t you?” she asked. “Why don’t you install the lamp in there, and then tonight, we’ll all go there and pretend we had dinner plans. Once we’re all together, we can turn the lamp on and deal with the consequences ourselves, hopefully without alerting anyone else.”

“That’ll never work,” Divayth said. “Sil wouldn’t break his routine just because we told him it’s dinnertime.”

“Look, we all know this isn’t our Sotha Sil. And whoever this guy is, he’s not even a very good impostor. If we all show up, adamant that he made plans to have dinner with us tonight, what’s he going to do? Object? Admit that he ‘forgot?’”

“It’s better than Fyr’s plan,” Luciana said after a moment.

“I’ll give it that, too,” Varuni said. “But I want the record to show that I don’t like it. I don’t like any of this.”

“It’ll have to do,” Luciana said. “Fyr, install the lamp. I’ll see you all back here at dinnertime.”

* * *

The four of them walked to Sotha Sil’s chambers together that evening. Varuni looked to have dressed for the occasion, wearing fancier-than-normal Apostle robes, while none of the rest of them had changed since their conversation that afternoon.

None of them was positive that Sotha Sil would even be there; they were working off his usual schedule, and they all knew there might be unexpected deviations. Luckily, he was indeed in his chambers when they arrived and came to the door when they knocked, greeting them with a raised eyebrow.

Divayth gave him a quick hug, and then sniffed the air. “Did you forget to cook dinner? Ugh, don’t tell me you’re going to make us eat that awful nutriment paste again.” He ushered the party inside and closed the door. “I was going to bring something myself, but Iya convinced me otherwise. Said you wouldn’t forget it was your turn to host dinner this time.  _ Clearly, _ I shouldn’t have listened.”

Varuni bowed deeply once she was inside. “I would like to thank you once again, Lord Seht, in person rather than in my prayers. I was incredibly honored to receive your invitation. I’ve been looking forward to this dinner all week.”

Ildari noticed a tremble in Varuni’s legs and cast her a subtle nod of approval while Sotha Sil’s attention was floating between them.

“Dinner?” he scoffed. “I am your god. I have no need for meals.”

“Neither do I,” Luciana said. “That’s never stopped either of us before.”

“It’s a little dark in here, don’t you think?” Divayth asked before Sotha Sil could object further. “I’m sure you wouldn’t mind if I—”

He switched on the lamp. Sotha Sil’s impostor shrieked and transformed into a being of shadow. Three of them drew their weapons—Varuni stepped out of the way.

“Weaken it.  _ Don’t _ kill it,” Divayth said.

After a few blows landed, the being dissolved into a puddle of shadows, snaking its way through them and along the floor.

“You fools,” its voice echoed through the room. It still sounded like Sotha Sil’s voice, but with a sinister quality now that its nature was revealed. “You won’t stop me from reaching my goal. Not at the expense of your precious godling.”

They chased it out of the room and into the hall, but it dispersed into the regular shadows as soon as it was out of the light.

“Slag it,” Luciana muttered. She jogged over to the nearest factotum.

“Greetings, Proctor Luciana Pullo.”

“Initiate silent lockdown Lyr-Payem-282.”

“Dreaming…fishing boat…splashing waves…Initiated.”

The factotum resumed walking as though nothing had changed.

“Well, that was unexpected, and unfortunate,” Divayth said when they caught up to Luciana. “If an impostor seeks the Throne Aligned and has the means to access it, we can all expect to be dead soon enough. Regardless, I’ll do my own research and regroup with you all as needed. Do try not to die prematurely.” He opened a portal and vanished through it.

“We should check on the rest of the Congress of Calibration,” Varuni said.

“Agreed. Let’s start with Gascone, and not out of interest in his well-being,” Luciana said. “That skeevaton has always been half a click of the gear away from revealing himself as an actual villain. Maybe he’s finally taken the step.”

They made their way back down to the main floor of the Basilica as quickly as they could without attracting attention. A balding Breton man tried to hurry past them out of the building, but Luciana caught him by the arm before he could get very far. Based on descriptions she had heard and her companion Apostles’ interest in him, Ildari suspected that this was the fabled skeevaton himself.

“Chancellor Gascone, just the man I wanted to see!”

“Not now, Proctor. I have important business to deal with elsewhere.” He broke out of her grip and exited the building.

“Well, that didn’t help his case,” Luciana said, folding her arms. “The lockdown will prevent him from getting far by even the lesser-known conventional means, but we should still keep an eye on him, in case he has Daedric allies. You two go check his office. I’ll start tracking him.”

The office was in a state of complete disarray, more than one would expect of even the messier scholars. Sounds of rustling and muttering carried over to them from behind the bookshelf partition. Ildari drew her staff and motioned for Varuni to stay behind her. On the other side of the shelves was a shrike of Nocturnal, tearing through Gascone’s belongings. She launched into combat the moment she noticed Ildari.

Ildari cast a ward around herself and Varuni to deflect the swarm of shadowy crows that the Daedra sent toward them. When the swarm had diffused, she slammed her staff down to send fire through the floor, and then cast a bolt of magic at the shrike. They danced for a few moments, exchanging bursts of shadow and elemental magic, until a lightning bolt finished the shrike off.

While Ildari examined the shrike for any useful information before the body could return to Evergloam, Varuni sifted through Gascone’s scattered belongings.

“He left a note.”

Ildari turned around to see Varuni holding a message plaque. She offered it to Ildari when she was done reading.

> Fellow Apostles,
> 
> A matter of no small import recently came to my attention, and I must attend to it forthwith. I apologize for any disruption my brief absence might cause. Please refer any urgent questions to my aide.
> 
> There is no need for alarm. Everything is fine. Please carry on in a manner befitting your station.
> 
> Yours in faith,   
-G

“Though I hate to even imagine it, he does seem to be involved in this,” Varuni said.

“How could he have known to run off at just the right time? That shrike probably wouldn’t have let him escape so easily if he’d been here when she arrived.”

“Perhaps the shadow warned him?” Varuni suggested hesitantly. “Or maybe he has some sort of interplanar alarm system. He’s done some surprisingly precise work on interplanar travel.” She paused. “Oh dear. That was never theoretical, was it?”

“Doesn’t sound like it.”

“That skeevaton. What does he gain by compromising the integrity of Seht’s holy city?”

“I don’t know. Maybe we should see if Luciana’s made any progress in tracking him so that we can ask him ourselves.”


End file.
